Charlottes Web

His name is- well actually, she doesn’t have a name yet. For the moment, she’s still just a little pig. But as you’ll see, she isn’t just any ordinary pig.

Who am I? Where am I? I’ve never been here before (beat). I’ve never been anywhere before. Everything seems so strange. But I like it…I think.

She was very contented living with Fern and the Arable family.

I love it here.

She was becoming quite a speciman of a pig.

I chalk it up to good, clean living.

Suppertime, Wilbur.

And to good, fattening food.

Before long, Wilbur was five weeks old.

I’d say it’s about time for a birthday party.

He was big.

Now let them call me a runt.

And strong.

Anyone for arm wrestling?

And healthy.

Check out the pink in the cheeks.

And he was ready to be sold.

For a pretty fair price, I’m willing to…(beat). Sold! Oh no! (faints)

It’s very nice here Wilbur. And I can come down and visit you almost everyday. Now I’d better go. I’ll see you tomorrow.

It’s a very large barn. And old, I’ll bet. I like the smell. Hay and manure. Horses and cows. It has a peaceful smell… As though nothing bad could happen ever again in the world. (beat) Fern was right. It is very nice here. (sleeps)

Hello, hello, hello.

Who…who are you?

The Goose.

Oh. Hi, Goose.

And this is my friend, the Gander, Gander, Gander.

But I only see one Gander. You introduced me to three.

Do you have a name…besides pig?

Yes. They call me Wilbur.

Well nobody, nobody, nobody asked you.

Who was that?

Well, I will admit it’s nice to have a pig around the place again. I haven’t had delicious, leftover slops in ages.

But the slops will be for me.

Oh, yeah. The pig.

You know about me?

And fatten you up with delicious slops.

Oh, I am going to like it here.

Just the same, we don’t envy you. You know why they want to make you fat and tender, don’t you?

No, I don’t.

Now, now, now old sheep. She’ll learn soon enough.

Learn what?

Nice to meet you, Wilbur.

My pleasure, I’m sure.

Good, good, good night Wilbur. Better get some rest after such a long day.

Yes, thank you, I will. The animals seem nice…I think. But I’m not sure about Templeton (beat). And I’m a trifle concerned about the old sheep’s remark. “You know why they want to make you fat and tender, don’t you?”…Well, I don’t know. And old sheep didn’t tell me. Well, I’m not going to worry about it just now. I’m much too tired.

Go to sleep, Wilbur. Go to sleep, little pig.

Oh, no. Morning already. And it’s raining. In my dreams, I had made such grand plans for today. Let’s see.

6:30

Breakfast.

7

A nap indoors.

8

A nap outdoors. In the sun.

9

Dig a hole.

10

Fill up the hole.

11

Just stand still and watch the flies. And the bees and the swallows.

12

Lunch.

1

Sleep.

2

Scratch itchy places by rubbing against the fence.

3

A visit from Fern.

4

Supper. And 4:30 on…

Free time!

Right. I get everything all beautifully planned out, and it has to go and rain. i’m lonesome. And I know Fern wont’t come in such bad weather. Oh, honestly. I’m less than two months old, and already I’m tired of living.

What’s wrong with you? We must have a sick pig here. Mr. Zuckerman! Come out to the barn.

It does look delicious. But I don’t want food. I want love. I want a friend. Someone who will play with me.

Do you want a friend, Wilbur? I’ll be a friend to you. I watched you all night, and I like you.

Where are you? And who are you?

Good work, Lurvy. That pig will be well in no time.

Attention, please! Will the party who just spoke to me make himself or herself known? (beat) Please tell me where you are if you are my friend.

Salutations

Oh, hello. What are salutations?

It’s a fancy way of saying “hello”

Oh. And salutations to you, too. Very pleased to meet you. What is your name, please? May I have your name?

My name is Charlotte.

Charlotte what?

Charlotte A. Catatica. I’m a spider.

I think you’re beautiful.

Thank you.

And your web is beautiful, too.

It’s my home. I know it looks fragile. But it’s really very strong. It protects me. And I trap my food in it.

I’m so happy you’ll be my friend. In fact, it restores my appetite. (eating) Will you join me?

No, thank you. My breakfast is waiting for me on the other side of the web.

Oh. What are you having?

A fly. I caught it this morning.

(chokes) You eat…flies?

And bugs. Actually, I drink their blood.

Ugh!

That’s the way I’m made. I can’t help it. Anyway, if I didn’t catch insects and eat them, there would soon be so many they’d destroy the earth, wipe out everything.

Really? I wouldn’t want that to happen.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to have my breakfast.

Well, I’ve got a new friend, all right. But Charlotte is…brutal I think. And bloodthirsty. How can I learn to like her, even though she is pretty, and very clever, it seems (lie down)

We’re pleased as we can be, be, be.

How many Goslings are there?

Certainly, -ertainly, -ertainly. Add it to your nasty collection.

Imagine wanting a junky old rotten egg.

And you know why, don’t you?

You asked me that once before, but you didn’t tell me why.

She has to know sometime.

Know what?

Wilbur, I don’t like to spread bad news. But they’re fatttening you up because they’re going to kill you.

They’re going to what?

Kill you. Turn you into smoked bacon and ham. It’ll happen when the weather turns cold. It’s a regular conspiracy.

Stop! I don’t want to die. I want to stay with all my friends. I want to breathe the beautiful air and lie in the beautiful sun.

You’re certainly making a beautiful noise.

But I don’t want to die.

Wilbur quiet down. You shall not die.

What? Who’s going to save me?

I am.

How?

I’m glad that’s over. I’m sure the smell will go away soon.

Charlotte?

Yes.

Were you serious when you promised you would keep them from killing me?

I’ve never been more serious in my life.

How are you going to save me?

Well, I really don’t know. But I want you to get plenty of sleep and stop worrying.

Okay. Good night, Charlotte.

Good night, Wilbur. (beat)

Thank you, Charlotte.

Some pig. Not bad old girl, for the first time around. But it was quite exhausting. I’d better catch a little nap before daybreak.

No, no. Please don’t. Stop! (wakes) Oh, my goodness. That was a terrible dream. There were men with guns and knives coming out here to take me away.

I’m seeing things. Mr Zuckerman! Mr Zuckerman! I think you’d better come out to the pig pen quick!

What did he see? There’s nothing out here but me. That’s it! He saw me! He saw that I’m big and healthy and… and ready to be made into… ham! They’re coming out here right now with guns and knives. I just know it. What can I do? (beat) Wait! The fence that Lurvy patched up. Maybe it’s loose again. I have to get out. I have no choice. It’s either freedom… or the frying pan. But first, a little sustenance. Now, I’m ready. I’m breaking out of this prison. They’ll never take me alive! (beat) What am I saying? I’ve got to get out of here. (starts running) Chaaaarrrrge!

What was that? Wilbur, where are you?

I’m free!

The Goslings can’t sleep.

(run on)

Now stop this! Don’t encourage her. If Wilbur does escape, she’ll never stand a chance in the outside world. So, if she runs through here again, we’ve got to stop her. Get set! Here she comes.

(runs in) I’ll make it this time! I saw an open gate that leads to the woods. Thank you everybody, for all your- What is this? Even my friends have turned against me! I’ll not go down without a fight! I’ll struggle all the way to the butcher block! I won’t be bacon for anybody!

I’d say he’s…some pig. Well, let’s hurry and get the chores done. I’m sure we’ll have lots of visitors when word of this leaks out.

Oh, Charlotte. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Tonight, I will tear my web apart and write “terrific”. Now go out into the yard and lie in the sun, Wilbur. I need a little rest. I was up all night.

Thank you Charlotte. You’re the best friend a pig ever had.

She fell asleep.

I can’t believe I spent the entire day and night outside sleeping. Oh well. It’s very refreshing. Especially in the summer.

I don’t believe my eyes. “Terrific” It did! It did happen again! “Terrific” Another miracle! Mr Zuckerman! Come quick! It’s another miracle!

It’s beautiful.

Good morning, Wilbur.

Oh, Charlotte. Everybody’s so excited about the new word. And they’re expecting more visitors today.

Morning, morning, morning.

Did you see Charlotte’s new word?

Wilbur, is all this attention going to go to your head and make you stuck up?

Of course not. Fame will never spoil me.

Anyway, she still has to worry about the future. Her life is still not secure yet.

I know. But I can face anything with friends like you. Friendship is one of the most satisfying things in the world.

Do a front flip…a back flip…and roll over into a split! It may not be radiant, but it’s interesting.

Actually, I feel radiant. I really do.

Oh, yes. And Mr. Zuckerman’s even talking about taking you to the County Fair if all this excitement continues.

Did you hear that, everybody? The County Fair. That means I would get to live for at least another month.

If you win a blue, blue, blue ribbon.

You’ll go to the Fair with me, won’t you Charlotte?

I don’t know. The Fair comes at a bad time for me. That’s when I’ll be making my egg sac and filling it with eggs.

You could lay your eggs at the Fair.

Sounds good, Edith.

Charlotte, you did it. Thank you. Thank you.

Well, we got you to the Fair. But that’s only half the battle.

Will you come with me, Charlotte? Please?

Ditto, ditto, ditto.

I’ll be out in the sun taking a nap, Charlotte.

Well, better be getting back. I’ve got to get spiffy for the crowds that will be coming to admire me. So long, sister.

Oh, hi, Charlotte. Where is everybody?

Off to see the Fair.

Did I hear you talking to someone?

A pig that’s staying next door.

Is he better than me? I mean…bigger?

I’m afraid he is much bigger.

Oh, no.

But he has a most unattractive personality. Oh, he’s going to be a hard pig to beat on account of his size and weight. But with me helping you, it can be done.

When will you be writing the new word?

Well, let’s go look at the horses and see if we can pick the winner over there.

Oh, dear. Did you hear that Charlotte?

I hope you brought a good one. It is the last word I shall ever write.

Charlotte, what do you mean?

Fare thee well, Charlotte, you old schemer! This will be a night to remember in a rats life.

Charlotte, what did you mean when you said this would be your last word?

Shhhh…

But Charlotte….

Mother, let me tell you about my ferris wheel ride with Henry. One time we stopped at the very top, and you really could see the whole county. Or at least I guess it was the whole county.

It’s nice that Fern found a friend here at the Fair.

Well, I’d better be getting to work.

Is this really going to be your last word, Charlotte?

I think so. I don’t have much strength left. And tonight I have another job to do.

Is it something for me?

No. It’s something for me for a change.

Please tell me what it is.

I’ll show you in the morning.

Listen. It’s the fireworks.

Fireworks are an important part of the Fair.

This is the first night I’ve ever spent away from home. (beat) I’m glad you’re with me Charlotte. I never feel lonely when you’re near.

Thank you.

Even if I don’t win the blue ribbon…and the worst happens…I will never forget you.

That’s very nice of you to say. Now, go to sleep.

Good night.