Rake Carbuncle - Destiny

okay.

What do you want me to do with this picnic basket clover?

Rake carbuncle you put the picnic basket on the blanket

Gosh, you know everything clover. You're going to make some man a great secretary.

lets eat

im hungry

it's a girl's name

we don't want to play

if we dont play london bridge is falling down nobody's going to eat peanut butter sandwiches. Don't forget- it's my picnic basket.

oh, all right

everybody sing. Loud

"London bridge is falling down, falling down, falling down. London bridge is falling down, falling down falling down. London bridge is falling down my fair lady!"

she couldn't find any big enough to fit!

hahahahahaha

I don't think we should make fun of little peggy just because she's a mess.
It doesn't cost anything to be polite.

this belongs to be. I threw it in the trash last week.

Let her have it.

stop shoving! stop it!

You leave her alone, todd.

make me

Ok, i will.
(very light fist tap to his face)

OOoooooooooh. I'm going to tell the teacher what you did.

Tattletale, tattletale.

You're like the prince that came to the rescue of the beautiful princess

aw, it wasn't anything.

Rake carbuncle, rake carbuncle

I have to go now. I don't want clover and the other kids mad at me. See ya!

*scene 2 starts*

Brewster said you wanted to see us, mama.

i can't understand a work that old woman says.

sometimes she forgets and puts her dentures in backwards

It's a wonder he doesn't bite off his head. How old is brewster?

Beats me. How old is brewster, mama?

who, dear?

Our butler.

Have a butter cookie rake?

No cookie, but i could do with a perrier

It's quite a distinctive nose

It's not one you'd forget in a hurry.

you said to rake - "one day I'll be in your house."

I remember that.

Well, you are in his house. Youre the maid. hahahahah

hahahahhahahahhah

What a loser. Imagine that drab drab showing up here.

She's in love with me.

hashahahahahahah

no it's true, honest!

hahahahahahahahaha

good old little peggy drab. Always good for a chuckle

A chuckle? she's a scream!

I like her. Besides with that nose, who knows? she might go far. In children's theatre.

More like cyrano de bergerac

who?

I think I will have a butter cookie after all.

Oh rake, how could you marry clover?

Easy.

That's why you're poor and we're rich.

MMMMMMMmmm! These butter cookies are gooood!

Don't be stupid. Butler I want a water bottle.

Have a butter cookie, Peggy.

My heart is broken.

Well, in your case, a broken heart IS better than a broken nose.

This nose! this nose! always this nose!

Maybe i'd see you differently if it weren't there.
(cover her nose from your sight)

You mean the only thing standing between you and me is my nose?

I don't mind your nose. But i can't go against family tradition.

Clover doesn't love you!

You heard mama. We're talking business.

That's so cynical

That's life!

If that's the way you feel i have a wedding present for you.

Thanks peggy, that's sporting of you.

I hope you and your "partner" will be happy together.

What is this? Looks like a piece of an old tree trunk.

That's what it is. Bark.

You wan't me to bark? (kinky)

(It's a piece of bark from an old tree.

what happened to the tree?

smog got it. Read what's written there.

It's so faded.

"Rake Carbuncle loves little peggy Drabb." I didn't write that!

You might have written it. Years ago. When you were a different person. When you were my prince in a storybook

huh?

But you've changed. You're shallow - and fickle

whah?

you're not a nice person anymore

Huh? (norwegianly)

I carved those words. After the school picnic.

What did you carve them with?

my fingernail.

Your fingernail! Clover's going to get a big laugh out of this!

You're not going to show it to clover!

Hey, clover, wait 'til you see this!

all in good time, my beauty.

Wow!

What is it rake?

Look at that gorgeous woman with Dr. Balducci!
Ive never seen anything, so, beautiful!

what am I? chopped liver?

Sorry, clover. I didn't mean to suggest you're anything but gorgeous and beautiful.

Let me get a good look at this FEMALE. Well, i must admit, she certainly is ravishing. She must be the woman your mother met in the salon di loveliness. This afternoon. She couldn't be talking about her.

Oh, so that's the woman.
Hello Dr. Balducci

Good evening. Rake. May i present a friend of mine?

Dee-lighted!!

we're married. We're a team!

Mama sid you's be coming for dinner one evening.

Rake, your dinner's getting cold.

We haven't ordered yet.

Stop staring. you're behaving like a schoolboy!

I feel like a schoolboy. There's something about that woman that reminds me of someone I used to know.
Someone I used to like.

Who?

I can't remember. (a little frustrated.)

I think that's brewster.

Don't be stupid. This man doesn't look anything like Brewster.

I tell you it's brewster. Brewster, is that you?

It's brewster. (deadpan)

Brewster, what are you doing here? (grumbles)
What did he say?

Says he's moonlighting. He wants money for a motorcycle.

Everyone! everyone! Wonderful, wonderful news! I want you all to hear!

What is it, Doc?

Your dear mother too, Mr. Carbuncle.

Mama'll be delighted to come.

I hope we'll see a lot of each other.

You bet.
*all flirty* (eyebrow pumps)

Auuuiuuuuuuuugh!

Auuuuuuuuuugh!

What the flip?

Good heavens Rake. What's wrong with him?

He's dead. That's what's wrong with him.

From this point on, I shall devote myself to DESTROYING all those who have humiliated me in the past!

I'm thinking of running for senate.

Destiny.

What?

What about your husband?
Destiny: who?
(motion to the corpse)

*Start scene 3*

It's worse than I thought. A penny a share and the stock isn't selling.

Isn't there anything we can do, Rake? She's taken all our subsidies.

We've sunk EVERYTHING into our last corporation. Truing to save it from disaster. There's nothing left.

(emphasized but not too extreme or anything)

oh, my.

Where's clover?

Here I am!

We've reached the bottom line, Clover. This is it.
The carbuncle corporation is about to go under.

69 (nice)

What can my son do against the power of countess Balducci? That female seems intent on destroying us

Why?
(frustrated)

Why?

By tomorrow morning the stock won;t be worth a penny a share.

How much will it be worth?

Exactly nothing. I'll have to get, a job. (spooky)(mortified)

Don't be vulgar.

Maybe you could find a job at mcdonald's.
(sad)

McDonalds?!?!

(determined) I know!

what?

I'll speak to mrs. Mink.
Why didn't I think of that before?

Give it the old college try, Rake.

Where are you going?

come back you, er, uh, miss, er miss, uh-

Thank you for seeing me, Miss Mink. It's been a long time.

Years. Please be brief. My time is money and you're wasting it.

You're not an easy woman to see.
Why are you trying to destroy the Carbuncle corporation?

You of all people should understand. Business is business. Dog eat dog. Survival of the fittest. If you want to beg I'm listening.

What have the carbuncles ever done to you?

I suppose the carbuncle corporation is the only thing you ever loved.

That's not true.

I forgot your wife, shamrock.

Clover. She doesn't love me. I don't love her.

oh?

Ours was a marriage of convenience.

How convenient?

She'll divorce me the minute the company's gone.

(smiling) You're breaking my heart

My mother says you don't have a heart.

she would.

Well, I gave it the old college try. And I won't beg. I suppose mama and i will have to make the best of it. Living on public welfare won't be so bad. We both like soup.

I can always use a good janitor and your mother, i imagine could learn how to use the mop and pail.

you're wrong.

About the mop and pail?

About business being the only thing I ever loved.

I didn't know i was in love. At first, i didn't know what a precious thing love was. I was young and restless. There was a girl who loved me, who would have stood by me no matter what. I didn't take her love seriously. More fool I.

What became of her?

She was there one day, gone the next. She was a maid in my mother's mansion.

Maid?

Little peggy Drabb.

Little peggy drab?f

If only I could see her again. If only I could tell her I'm now mature enough to understand what love, true love, is all about.

Rake, I have something to tell you, something that will make you so happy. If I could be certain you wouldn't laugh.

If only she hadn't looked like Pinocchio.

You'll regret this!

That's Clover!

We've finally got her, Miss Mink.

Take your hands off my wife!

I should have known.

Clover, this can't be true.

It's true all right. I'm glad I did it. I'm not letting my fortune slip away without fighting back. Snap at me and I bite.

Business is business, Clover.

Yes ma'am

I wan't to apologize for my wife.

What a mean thing to say.

We don't have much of a choice, do we?

My attorney is across the hall.

(deep breath) Let's get it over with.

London Bridge?

It's better than nothing, Clover. We've got to be realistic.

It can't be.

It's brewster.

I didn't know Brewster was interested in law.

Last time I saw him he was trying to get money for a motorcycle. That was years back.