INTO THE WOODS: BAKER LINES

#2 Act 1 Opening, Part 2

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: …BUT DO YOU HAVE A BASKET?

BAKER: Don’t stray and be late.

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

NARRATOR: …he was eager to have a family of his own, and was concerned that all efforts until now had failed.

BAKER: Who might that be?

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

BAKER’S WIFE: We have sold our last loaf of bread…

BAKER: It’s the Witch from next door.

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

BAKER: It’s the Witch from next door.

BAKER’S WIFE, BAKER: We have no bread.

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

WITCH: Of course you have no bread!

BAKER: What do you wish?

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

NARRATOR: The old enchantress went on to tell the couple that she had placed a spell on their house.

BAKER: What spell?

#4 Act 1 Opening, Part 4

WITCH: …AND WE’LL CALL IT SQUARE.

BAKER: I had a brother?

#8 Act 1 Opening, Part 8

CINDERELLA: GOOD NIGHT FATHER.
I WISH…

Look what I found in Father’s hunting jacket.

#8 Act 1 Opening, Part 8

BAKER’S WIFE: Six beans.

BAKER: I wonder if they are the —

#8 Act 1 Opening, Part 8

BAKER’S WIFE: Witch’s beans? We’ll take them with us.

BAKER: No! You are not coming.

#8 Act 1 Opening, Part 8

BAKER’S WIFE: …THE SPELL IS ON MY HOUSE.

BAKER: No. You are not to come and that is final. Now what am I to return with?

#11 Hello, Little Girl

WOLF: AND HELLO…

BAKER: Is harm to come to that little girl… in the red cape!

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

WITCH: Forget the little girl and get the cape!

BAKER: You frightened me.

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

WITCH: That’s the cape. Get it. Get it. Get it!

BAKER: How am I supposed to get it?

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

WITCH: You go up to the little thing, and you take it.

BAKER: I can’t just take a cloak from a little girl. Why don’t you take it!

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

WITCH: …Get me what I need. Get me what I need!

BAKER: This is ridiculous. I’ll never get that red cape, nor find a golden cow, or a yellow slipper — or was it a golden slipper and a yellow cow? Oh, no…

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: …THE SLIPPER AS PURE AS —

BAKER: What are you doing here?

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: You forgot your scarf —

You have no business being alone in the Wood. And you have no idea what I’ve come upon here. You would be frightened for your life. Now go home immediately!

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: I wish to help.

No! THE SPELL IS ON MY HOUSE —

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: A COW AS WHITE AS —

BAKER, BAKER’S WIFE: —milk.
Hello there, young man.

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

JACK: Hello, sir.

BAKER: What might you be doing with a cow in the middle of the forest?

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: What are you planning to do there — ?

BAKER: And what are you planning to do there?

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

JACK: Sell my cow, sir. No less than five pounds.

BAKER: Five pounds!
Where am I to get five pounds!

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

JACK: …I suppose my mother and I will have no food to eat.

BAKER: This is the sum total…

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: Beans — we mustn't give up our beans! Well… if you feel we must.

BAKER: Huh?

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

BAKER’S WIFE: Tell him.

BAKER: Magic that defies description.

#12 - Underscore After “Hello, Little Girl”

JACK: How many beans?

BAKER: Six.

#13 - I Guess This Is Goodbye

JACK: Could I buy my cow back someday?

Well… possibly.
Good luck there, young lad.

#13 - I Guess This Is Goodbye

JACK: …IT WON’T BE ON A PLATE.

BAKER: Take the cow and go home!

#13 - I Guess This Is Goodbye

BAKER’S WIFE: I was trying to be helpful.

BAKER: Magic beans! We’ve no reason to believe they’re magic! Are we going to dispel this curse through deceit?

#14 - Maybe They’re Magic

BAKER’S WIFE: …At least they’ll have some food.

Five beans!

#14 - Maybe They’re Magic

BAKER’S WIFE: WHAT’S IMPORTANT, REALLY, IS THE SIZE.

BAKER: What?

#14 - Maybe They’re Magic

BAKER’S WIFE: THE BEANS!

BAKER: Take the cow and go home. I will carry this out in my own fashion!

#15 - Rapunzel

RAPUNZEL’S PRINCE: …I will stand before her window and ask her to let down her hair to me.

BAKER: Hello there, little one.

#15 - Rapunzel

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: Hello.

BAKER: Have you saved some of those sweets for Granny?

#15 - Rapunzel

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: I ate all the sweets, and half the loaf of bread.

BAKER: Where did you get that beautiful cape? I so admire it.

#15 - Rapunzel

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: My granny made it for me.

BAKER: Is that right? I would love a red cloak like that.

#15 - Rapunzel

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: You’d look pretty foolish.

BAKER: May I take a look at it?

#15 - Rapunzel

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: I don’t like to be without my cape. Please, give it back!

BAKER: I want it badly.

#15 - Rapunzel

WITCH’S VOICE: Forget the little girl and get the cape!

BAKER: I just wanted to make certain that you really loved this cape. Now you go to your granny’s — and you be careful that no wolf comes your way.

#17 - Grandmother’s House

NARRATOR: …And with his appetite appeased, the Wolf took to bed for a nice long nap.

BAKER: That grandmother has a mighty snore.

Odd. Where is the little one? Eating, no doubt.

Or eaten!

Grandmother, hah!

What is that red cloth in the corner of your mouth? Looks to me to be a piece of — ah hah! I’ll get the cape from within your stomach.

#17 - Grandmother’s House

GRANNY: Quiet, child. This evil must be destroyed.

BAKER: Well, I will leave you to your task.

#17 - Grandmother’s House

GRANNY: Don’t you want the skins?

BAKER: No. No! You keep them.

#17 - Grandmother’s House

GRANNY: What kind of a hunter are you?

BAKER: I’m a baker!

#18 - I Know Things Now

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: Mr. Baker, you saved our lives. Here.

BAKER: Are you certain?

#18 - I Know Things Now

LITTLE RED RIDINGHOOD: Yes. Maybe Granny will make me another with the skins of that wolf.

BAKER: Thank you!

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: …Look what I have! Here’s five gold pieces.

BAKER: Five gold pieces!

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: I had more, but my mother made me surrender them. She allowed me these five to do with as I pleased.

BAKER: Oh, my…

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: Where is Milky-White?

BAKER: Milky-White is back home with my wife.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: Let’s go find them!

BAKER: Wait!
I don’t know that I wish to sell.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: But you said I might buy her back.

BAKER: I know, but I’m not certain that five gold pieces would —

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: Are you saying that you wish more money?

More money is always —

#23 - Giants in the Sky

JACK: Keep this. I will go fetch more.

BAKER: Wait. I didn’t say —
Five gold pieces! With this money I could buy baking supplies for a year. I could buy a new thatched roof and a new chimney.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

MYSTERIOUS MAN: But could you buy yourself a child?

BAKER: Who are you?

#23 - Giants in the Sky

MYSTERIOUS MAN: …Could you buy yourself a child?

BAKER: I don’t understand.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

MYSTERIOUS MAN: How badly do you wish a child? Five gold pieces? Ten? Twenty?

BAKER: I’ve not thought to put a price on it.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

MYSTERIOUS MAN: Exactly
You’ve not thought about many things, have you, son?

BAKER: Give me back the money! It is not yours —

#23 - Giants in the Sky

MYSTERIOUS MAN: Nor is it Jack’s. The money is not what’s important. What’s important is that your wish be honored.

BAKER: Come back here! Damn! Give me back —
What are you doing here now?

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: I see you’ve the red cape.

BAKER: Yes. I’ve the cape. Only two items left to locate.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: Three.

BAKER: Two. I’ve the cape and the cow.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: You’ve the cape!

BAKER: What have you done with the cow?!

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: She ran away. I never reached home. I’ve been looking for her all night.

BAKER: I should have known better than to have entrusted her to you.

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: She might just as easily have run from you!

BAKER: But she didn’t!

#23 - Giants in the Sky

BAKER’S WIFE: But she might have!

BAKER: But she didn’t!!!

#23 - Giants in the Sky

WITCH: WHO CARES! THE COW IS GONE! GET IT BACK! GET IT BACK!!

BAKER: We were just going to do that.

Here. I can give you this —

#24 - Fanfares

BAKER’S WIFE: Lovely.

BAKER: She’s very gifted.

#24 - Fanfares

WITCH: By tomorrow’s midnight - deliver the items or you’ll wish you never thought to have a child!

BAKER: I don’t like that woman.

#24 - Fanfares

BAKER’S WIFE: I’m sorry I lost the cow.

BAKER: I shouldn’t have yelled.
Now, please, go back to the village.
I will make things right! And then we can just go about our life. No more hunting about in the Woods for strange objects. No more Witches and dim-witted boys and hungry little girls.
Go!

#26 - Jack, Jack/Rapunzel

JACK’S MOTHER: …Jack…! Jack…!

BAKER: Moo… Moo…

#26 - Jack, Jack/Rapunzel

MYSTERIOUS MAN: Moo! Looking for your cow?

BAKER: Where did you find her?
Hello?

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)
BAKER’S WIFE: Cow?

BAKER: Please, let me just compare this color with that of your own.

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

STEPMOTHER: Over there!

BAKER: I thought you were returning home.

I’ve had no luck.

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

BAKER’S WIFE: You’ve the cow!

BAKER: Yes. I’ve the cow. I’ve only two of the four.

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

BAKER’S WIFE: Three.

BAKER: Two!

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

BAKER’S WIFE: Three! Compare this to your corn.

BAKER: Where did you find it?

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

BAKER’S WIFE: I pulled it from a maiden in a tower.

BAKER: Three!

#27 - A Very Nice Prince (Reprise)

BAKER’S WIFE: And I almost had the fourth, but she got away.

BAKER: We’ve one entire day left. Surely we can locate the slipper by then.

#28 - It Takes Two

BAKER’S WIFE: We? You mean you’ll allow me to stay?

BAKER: Well… perhaps it will take the two of us to get this child.

#28 - It Takes Two

JACK: And the owners. And my hen!

BAKER: Look what this hen has dropped in my hand!

#29 - Cow Death

BAKER’S WIFE: Five gold pieces?

BAKER: Now, I never said I would sell —

#29 - Cow Death

BAKER’S WIFE: You took five gold pieces?!

BAKER: I didn’t take, you gave.

#29 - Cow Death

BAKER’S WIFE: Where are the five gold pieces?

BAKER: An old man —

#29 - Cow Death
JACK: You said I could have my cow!

BAKER: Now, I never said you could. I said you might.

#29 - Cow Death

JACK: Milky-White is dead…

BAKER: Two!

#30 - Second Midnight

NARRATOR: Two midnights gone. And the exhausted Baker and his wife buried the dead Milky-White.

BAKER: You must go to the village in search of another cow.

#30 - Second Midnight
BAKER’S WIFE: And what do you propose I use to purchase this cow?

BAKER: Here. Tell them it’s magic.

#30 - Second Midnight
BAKER’S WIFE: No person with a brain larger than this is going to exchange a cow for a bean.

BAKER: Then steal it.

#30 - Second Midnight
BAKER’S WIFE: Steal it? Just two days ago you were accusing me of exercising deceit in securing the cow.

BAKER: Then don’t steal it and resign yourself to a childless life.

#30 - Second Midnight
BAKER’S WIFE: I feel it best you go for the cow, as I have met a maiden with a golden slipper these previous eves, and I think I might succeed in winning one of her shoes.

BAKER: Fine.

#30 - Second Midnight
BAKER’S WIFE: Fine.

BAKER: That is simply —

#31 — Stay With Me

MYSTERIOUS MAN: When is a white cow not a white cow?

BAKER: I don’t know! Leave me alone!

#31 — Stay With Me

MYSTERIOUS MAN: Haven’t I left you alone long enough?

BAKER: Your questions make no sense, old man! Go away!

#34 - Underscore

BAKER’S WIFE: I’ve done nothing…

BAKER: I’ve the cow.

#34 - Underscore

BAKER’S WIFE: Yes. Slipper — Hair

BAKER: Cape — Cow— Shoe

#34 - Underscore

WITCH: This cow has been covered with flour!

BAKER: Well, we did have a cow as white as milk. Honestly we did.

#34 - Underscore

BAKER’S WIFE: She’s dead.

BAKER: We thought you’d prefer a live cow.

#34 - Underscore

WITCH: Of course I’d prefer a live cow! So bring me the dead cow and I’ll bring her back to life!

BAKER: You could do that?

#34 - Underscore

JACK’S MOTHER: You’ve stolen too much! You could have been killed coming down that plant.

BAKER: She’s too heavy.

#34 - Underscore

WITCH: Quiet! Feed the objects to the cow!

BAKER’S WIFE, BAKER, JACK: What?

#35 - The Potion
WITCH: Yes.

BAKER: And four, I compared the hair with this ear of corn.