2+3- ATHENS Marriage Customs

Young Women and Women in the Home

at what age would marriage be arranged for a girl

when she reached puberty (around 14 years old)

who arranged marriage for a girl

her kyrios

how would a kyrios arrange a marriage

he would select an appropriate groom and they would agree a dowry

what happened during the betrothal ceremony

• a dowry would be agreed

• both kyrios’s would swear an oath in front of witnesses

• from this moment the couple are considered legally married

when could betrothals happen

at any age, and years could pass before the actual marriage

what was the main concern of a kyrios when choosing a groom

for the match to be beneficial for both parties

why was the betrothal ceremony important

it formally confirmed the marriage as the bride and groom were technically married

what is a dowry

the money the brides family would pay the grooms family for the marriage between them

who was it common for a kyrios to give his daughter in marriage to

one of his friends or business partners, or one of their children; to solidify an alliance

what happens to the dowry if the husband wants a divorce

it protects the bride as if the husband wanted a divorcee he would have to return the dowry, meaning men would treat their wives better as they wouldn’t want to give this money away

why would rich families have less of a problem forming a marriage

they have more money to provide a better dowry

how does the size of the dowry change the wife’s influence over her husband

a larger dowry means that the husband may never be able to pay it back, meaning he wouldn’t be able to divorce her and his wife could influence her

how long did the wedding ceremony last

3 days

what happened on day 1 of the wedding ceremony

• the bride shares a feast with her female family and friends

• the bride made sacrifices to Artemis, Hera and Aphrodite

what does the brides feast signify

signifies the end of the brides old life

why does the bride make sacrifices to Artemis

to help transition from childhood to womanhood and for childbirth

why does the bride make sacrifices to Hera and Aphrodite

she does this to pray for good marriage and love

what happens on day 2 of the wedding ceremony

• the bride took a ritual bath

• the bride dressed in her finest clothes and best jewellry, and wore a veil

• the bride and grooms family shared a lavish feast

• the groom dragged the bride away from her mother in a pretend show of force

• the couple would travel from the brides house to the grooms

• the bride then taken to the hearth of the grooms house

why does the bride take a bath

• cleansed and purified her

• increased her fertility

why did the bride dress in her finest clothes

to show her wealth

why did the bride wear a veil

to show the brides modesty and purity

what is the importance of the feast the bride and grooms family share

establishes the alliance and trust between the two families

what does the groom dragging the bride away from her mother show

shows the bride isn’t a part of her childhood family anymore but now a member of her new household

what was the travel from the bride to the grooms house called

the torchlight procession

what happens during the torchlight procession

• the guests came and sang wedding songs and threw flowers and small fruits at the couple

• they all held torches

why did the guests throw flowers and small fruits

this blessed the couple and offered them prosperity and fertility

why did everyone hold torches during the torchlight procession

warded off any evil spirits

what happened at the end of the torchlight procession and what does this symbolise

the axle of the cart was burned, and this symbolises that the bride can’t return to her old home anymore as the cart that took her to the groom’s house can’t work

why was the bride taken to the hearth of the house

hearth is the heart of the home and Hestia is the goddess of a good home life

what happened between days 2 and 3

• the bride and groom spent the night together, consummating their marriage

• their friends and family waited outside the door, singing songs and banging on the door

why did the guests sing songs and bang on the dorr

• to prevent evil spirits from entering

• provides moral support as the wife is losing her virginity

• symbolises the bond between the bride and the groom

what happens on day 3 of the wedding ceremony

the couple would come out of the room and the guests would still be there and would sing wedding songs and give gifts to the bride

what were typical gifts the bride would receive

• clothing

• perfume

• jewels

• cosmetic tools

sources for Athenian weddings

• additional- black-figure lekythos depicting a wedding procession

what does this source show

• a wedding procession

• couple facing forwards on a carriage surrounded by many people, probably their friends and family

• the brides face is painted white

• the bride has a red veil

why is the brides face painted white

to show her fair skin as she doesn’t work outside, showing her wealth

why does the bride wear a red veil

shows her modesty

what does them being surrounded by so many people show

shows lots of people and wealth were involved in Athenian weddings

why were eye-witnesses important to the wedding ceremony

there were no official marriage records, so if anyone claimed a couple wasn’t married, the witnesses could prove that they are