Peter and the Starcatcher Lines (Molly)

SMEE: —high as a cloud and lighter than air—

—then loop the loop and up into the stars! I dreamed about flying all the time. (beat) What? Girls dream.

BOY: Up to the stars—I like that.

Me too.

BOY: That's the rule.

Everything ends.

SCOTT: —and captains—

—mothers—

ASTER: —a crucial year in the reign of Her Majesty, Queen Victoria—

GOD SAVE HER.

ASTER: Lord Leonard Aster, dedicated minister to the Queen and devoted father—

—to Molly Aster, whose mother flew up to heaven when Molly was just six years old.

ASTER: While, taking her with him on each royal mission, Lord Aster gave Molly a life few girls would normally know—

A life that made her insatiably curious, insufferably bright and pretty much friendless at school.

TED: Me too.

Boys!

PRENTISS & TED: We're lost!

BOYS!

ASTER: and Lord Leonard Aster—

His friendless Molly—

BUMBRAKE: And her nanny, Mrs. Bumbrake—

JOURNEYED AT DAWN TO THE DOCKS OF PORTSMOUTH.

ASTER: Molly, my Molly.

Please let me come with you. I don't like it on this ship.

ASTER: You're safer here on the Neverland. By the time you arrive in Rundoon, I'll have completed my mission, and we'll be together again.

Look, Daddy—the cat, the ships cat. A lucky sign! Here, puss, puss...

ASTER: Molly! Careful!

It's alright, Daddy. Him's a sweet puss, isn't him...

BUMBRAKE: Our Molly loves all God's little creatures.

Daddy...I know you don't need my help in Rundoon, but I've got to start pulling my weight sometime.

ASTER: You're all grown up, aren't you.

I am, Daddy. Courage now, promise?

ASTER: Promise.

Oh dear.

N. BOY: One of the boys almost falls out!

N. Hanging upside down just over Molly's head!

N. BOY: He stares at her.

N. She stares at him.

N. BOY: He has an air about him.

N. The look of a boy who doesn't miss much, or say much about it.

SLANK: Back in the box, y'monkeys!

N. Something about the boy makes Molly feel like she just grew up a little.

ASTER: Daughter. A word. There isn't any treasure in the Queens trunk, and what IS in it has to be destroyed, by order of her majesty, Queen Victoria.

God Save Her.

ASTER: I'll have to move quickly, before the King of Rundoon even knows I'm there.

But how are you going to destroy it?

ASTER: Can you keep it a secret?

I can.

ASTER: Cwah cheep wirp reep reep burp.

Click...bleep...cwaaaah!

ASTER: Sorry?

Click bleep cwaaaah?

ASTER:...and don't ever take this off or let anyone else touch it. You know what's in this amulet, Molly. And you know how to use it if you're ever in trouble.

But what if something happens to you? You need me on the Wasp.

ASTER: Too dangerous—I won't have it.

I want to be a part of the mission!

ASTER: If you can't be British, you can go straight home and back to school, young lady. Mrs. Bumbrake—

NO! Don't send me home please. I'll be good, I promise.

BUMBRAKE: Shut the faucet, Molly—blubberin' like a whale when the world's your oyster! Be a woman!

Yes, Nana.

ASTER: As soon as I'm done in Rundoon, we'll take a few weeks in the Antipodes—scare up some rare birds eggs, hmm? I might even teach you to speak Porpoise.

Yes, Daddy.

ASTER: There's my little Starcatcher.

Just an apprentice. If I were a Starcatcher, I'd be on the Wasp with you!

BUMBRAKE: With pleasure. The cabin could smell no worse than you.

Can we have kitty with us?

BUMBRAKE: First class ain't what it used to be...(monologues)...There are men who can smell it on you, Molly, and they make you pay...

That's a stupid example if you're going to cry halfway through. Be a woman!

MRS. BUMBRAKE: Mr. Bumbrake fell off the twig years ago. Left me widowed at fort—er, thirty.

Is that food? I'm awfully hungry.

ALF: This ain't for no ladies. It's fer the pigs down the other end.

Pigs? Really? May I help you feed them?

ALF: Been thinking 'bout getting in shape, me-self.

Round is a shape.

BUMBRAKE: He's rough but he's ready, that Alf.

He smelt like smelt.

BUMBRAKE: True...but there's a whiff of hero about him, mark my words.

Left the cabin door ajar. I could follow him and feed the piggies! May I, Nana, please?

SLANK: Left, y'fool! Gimme his left! A nice big P—help you remember!

Pigs!? Where's the pigs?

PRENTISS: I'll think of something.

No, you won't. (boys scream) In my experience, boys are sadly slow thinkers.

PRENTISS: What ARE you?

I'm a girl.

TED: It was nothing like you. It was all—"aarrgh, rowrrr, gonna gotcha!"

Who's the leader here?

PRENTISS: Who wants to know?

Molly Aster. Doctor Pretorius back home says I have an extraordinarily high level of brain power.

PRENTISS: If you're so smart, how come you're stuck on this dirt-bucket?

I'm not stuck. I'm going to meet my father in Rundoon. He has important things to do.

BOY: He's not the leader.

You.

BOY: You.

How old are you?

BOY: How old are you?

I'm thirteen.

BOY: I'm thirteen.

Wait—I just remembered today's my birthday. I'm fifteen.

BOY: If you were thirteen and todays your birthday, you'd be fourteen.

I only celebrate odd-numbered birthdays.

PRENTISS: Wait a minute, wait a minute, doesn't matter how old you are! I'm still the leader. The leader has to be a boy.

Hey—up our end of the ship we get served proper food. I could lead you there—which would make me the leader.

TED: Proper food? Really?

Just tell me your names.

BOY: Why should we?

Only that...if you have names, they serve you meat.

PRENTISS: Like I said, food-obsessed. I'm Prentiss. I'm in charge here.

Ever notice, Ted—the more you claim leadership, the more it eludes you?

PRENTISS: Oh, snap!

And what are you, boy?

BOY: Leave me alone.

Sorry.

TED: Go on, tell her your name, why don't you?

What's so funny?

PRENTISS: Like we need your permission, friendless.

Doesn't cost any more to be nice, charmless.

PRENTISS: You can be like temporary leader—but only 'til we eat.

Fair warning, boy—I shall expose you utterly.

N. GREMPKIN: As no one had ever shown the slightest interest in him before, the boys eyes began to sparkle and the lure of competition wipe led some of the misery from his face.

Right. Follow me.

N. STACHE: Father and son—

N. —mother and child.

BOY: Mother. Mother...

C'mon, you! Last chance! We Asters do not leave boys behind!

(START OF ACT ONE, SCENE SIX)

My father. He's in trouble.

PRENTISS: Your neck-thing is glowing.

Don't ask me about that.

BOY: Lay off, Prentiss. C'mon, you have to tell.

Alright, listen. My father is going to Rundoon on a secret mission for the Queen.

BUMBRAKE: Molly! Where are you, girl?

Ssssh! Down this gangway, and keep it quiet!

TED: Tell me again, what was it called, what we ate?

Pork chops, pork salad, and pork belly pie.

TED: Greatest night of my life.

Sssshhh! There's more tomorrow if we don't get caught.

PRENTISS: Her neck-thing—

No, it's coming from someplace else.

BOY: Behind this door.

Get away, Boy! Don't open that cabin!

BOY: Holy—!

Slank's—!

ASTER: —and that cabin is definitely glowing.

Glowing—ringing—flying—it can only mean one thing!

ASTER: Starstuff!

Starstuff! The Queen's trunk is is Slank's cabin! (closes the door) Okay, nothing to see here, move along.

TED: But that cat was—

No it wasn't.

PRENTISS: Yes it was! Tubby's right! Your neck-thing was ringing and Slank's cat was totally fly—

Hey—y'know what'd be fun? Howzabout a bedtime story!

TED: What's that?

Oh, ha ha, very amus—omigosh—you poor things. You've never had a bedtime story?

TED: Hard to have a bedtime when you don't have a bed.

Sorry. Sorry, I didn't mean to—

BOY: So, bedtime stories? Not a big deal, okay?

No, it's not okay. I'm giving you one. It's a gift. Least I can do. Like, um—Sleeping Beauty. Sleeping Beauty's a good one. You'll like it. There's a kiss in it. True Love's kiss.

TED: Yeah! I don't know what that is.

Then I'll tell you. C'mon—back to your cabin and I'll be Mother. Now—the story of Sleeping Beauty. "Once upon a time"—that's how they always start—"Once upon a time, beautiful baby was born..."

(START OF ACT ONE, SCENE EIGHT)

And as the Princess slept, a thick forest grew up around the castle, keeping everybody out. Everybody but one man. Boys?

BOY: The Prince, right?

The Prince, yes, very good. He chopped his way to Sleeping Beauty's room, saw his true love and kissed her, just once, sweetly on the lips.

TED: Mmm...pork.

And True Love's Kiss broke the spell, the Princess found her Prince, and they all lived happily ever—The amulet again! Talk to me, Daddy!

N. ASTER: With the Wasp racing at flank speed for the Neverland, Leonard Aster clears his mind and tries to reach Molly.

Daddy, are you there? Hello, hello?

ASTER: Can you hear me now? Can you hear me now?

Daddy—the Queen's trunk is here, on board the Neverland!

ASTER: Not in English! Too dangerous.

Oh dear, please don't speak in—

ASTER: Brump burppel wheee!

Oh Daddy, not Dodo.

ASTER: Myah myah vrrreeep!

Parrots? A flock of parrots?

ASTER: Vrrrraaap, vrrrrrreeep! Eeeep!

Parrots have taken over your ship? Well, what genius brought parrots—?

ASTER: PIRATES! We've been taken over by pirates!

Pirates! Oh, that hard "i" sound is so tricky—

ASTER: MOLLY! The Wasp is bearing down on the Neverland! Soon as we catch you, steer clear of Black STACHE and BRING THE TRUNK TO ME!

I will!

ASTER: Don't let me down, Daughter! This is your mission now!

Yes, sir. Thank you, sir! Cwa-cwah! Cwa-cwah! Vreeeep!

BOY: What are you doing?

Sorry, what? Um—get below, boy. If Slank sees you up here, he'll rear up like the—

BOY: You were talking to your neck-thing.

No, I wasn't.

BOY: I know what I saw.

Well, there was...there was a porpoise swimming alongside the ship, and it was making those funny noises that porpoises make, and I though I'd make some funny noises too, that's all.

BOY: So you were talking to a fish.

Porpoises are not fish. They're mammals, just like you. Or Germans.

BOY: Then how come your neck-thing glows and rings all by itself?

It's for swimming. I'm a good swimmer. It's a swimming medal.

BOY: Right. Swimming. Sure. And what's starstuff?

Decision. I'm going to trust you.

Boy: Why? I'm just a boy.

I know. Pity. (beat) You like to look at the stars? Well, there they are—

BOY: There's so many.

They look safe, don't they, sparkling up there like diamonds.

BOY: I like when they shoot across the sky! Shooom!

Sometimes pieces of them fall to earth—little bits that look like sand. Can you keep a secret?