Intimate Relationships PSY 473 - Final Exam

What are the three components of love identified by the Triangular Theory?

intimacy, passion, commitment

What are the eight different kinds of love that result from combinations of intimacy, passion, and commitment?

Nonlove

Liking

Infatuation

Empty Love

Romantic Love

Companionate Love

Fatuous Love

Consumate Love

What type of love results from intimacy, passion, and commitment all being absent?

Nonlove

________ love is casual, superficial, and uncommitted. Probably just acquaintances, not even friends.

Nonlove

What type of love results from high intimacy with low passion and commitment?

Liking

________ love are friendships that do not arouse passion or the expectation that you'll spend your lives together

Liking

What type of love results from high passion with low intimacy and commitment?

Infatuation

__________ love is when you're aroused by others you barely know

Infatuation

What type of love results from high commitment with low intimacy and passion?

Empty Love

_________ love are often burned-out relationships or arranged marriages

Empty Love

What type of love results from high intimacy and passion with low commitment?

Romantic Love

__________ love can often be seen in summer love affairs

Romantic Love

What type of love results from high intimacy and commitment with low passion?

Companionate love

_________ love is a deep, long-term friendship. Long, happy marriages often have a lot of this type of love

Companionate love

What type of love results from high passion and commitment with low intimacy?

Fatuous love

__________ love is often present when partners marry quickly on the basis of overwhelming passion but don't know (or necessarily like) each other

Fatuous love

What type of love results when intimacy, passion, and commitment are all present to a substantial degree?

Consumate love

__________ love is easy to do for a while, but hard to maintain over time

Consumate love

Romantic love is produced, or at least intensified, when feelings of __________ are associated with the presence of another attractive person

arousal

What does "adrenaline fuels arousal" mean?

Physiological arousal, such as a fast heartbeat, in the presence of another person can make you think you are aroused by that person (i.e., standing on a high bridge with another person. your physical arousal is due to the height, not necessarily attraction for the person you're with)

An altruistic care and concern for the well-being of one's partner is a defining characteristic of _____________ love

compassionate love

Over time, ____________ love is typically stronger in enduring relationships than ___________ love is, and it is more highly correlated with the satisfaction people enjoy

companionate love; romantic love

Options: dopamine; oxytocin

Romantic, passionate love stimulates ______________, while companionate love involves ______________

dopamine; oxytocin

_________ declines, but _________ and _________ both increase as we age. Thus, companionate love may be more stable than romantic love is

passion; intimacy and commitment

Define unrequited love

romantic, passionate attraction to someone who did not return that interest

___________ love is a romantic, passionate attraction to someone who did not return that interest

unrequited love

Define the self-expansion model

suggests that love causes our self-concepts to expand and change as our partners bring us new experiences and new roles, and we gradually learn things about ourselves that we didn't know before

__________ are anything with an interaction that is desirable and welcome and that brings enjoyment or fulfillment to the recipient

rewards

_________ are punishing, undesirable experiences. Consequences of interaction that are frustrating/distressing (financial expenditures, injuries, psychological burdens)

costs

Outcomes = _________ minus _________

rewards; costs

Outcomes minus ___________ = satisfaction or dissatisfaction

comparison level

Define comparison levels (CLs)

the value of the outcomes that we've come to expect and believe that we deserve in our dealings with others.

Based on past experiences.

CLs are the standards by which our satisfaction with a relationship is measured

___________ are the standards by which our satisfaction with a relationship is measured

comparison levels

Outcomes minus _________ = dependence or independence

comparison level for alternatives

Define comparison level for alternatives (CLalt)

second criterion to determine whether we could be doing better somewhere else—the outcomes you'd receive by leaving your current partner and moving to the best alternative partnership/situation you have available—also the lowest levels of outcome we'll tolerate from our present partner—CLalt determine our dependence on our relationships

What explains why people stay in relationships that make them miserable and why?

comparison level for alternatives are not higher than their current satisfaction with their present partner, so they remain dependent on the relationship

______________ are the things one would lose if the relationship were to end

investments

When people's outcomes exceed both their CLs and CLalts, their relationship is _________ and __________

happy and stable

when people's outcomes fall below their CLs but are still higher than their CLalts, their relationship is __________ and _____________

unhappy and stable

when people's CLalts are higher than their outcomes but their CLs are lower, their relationship is ____________ and ____________

happy and unstable

when people's outcomes are lower than both their CLs and CLalts, their relationship is __________ and _________

unhappy and unstable

To stay satisfied with a relationship, we need to maintain a rewards-to-costs ratio of at least ________

5-to-1

_________ motivations for having sex would be to feel close to our partners and to enjoy the physical experience

approach motivation

__________ motivations for having sex would be to avoid negative rejection or to end a peevish partner's pouting

avoidance motivation

define approach motivation

in seeking rewards, we try to satisfy an appetite for desirable experiences. our motivation for doing something is to feel good

define avoidance motivation

our desire to avoid costs. we seek to escape punishment/pain, so we try to avoid undesired experiences and to reduce feelings like anxiety/fear

What four different types of relationships result as a combination of avoidance motivation and approach motivation?

Precarious

Flourishing

Distressed

Boring

____________ relationships have fulfilled approach motivations and thwarted avoidance motivations

precarious

___________ relationships have fulfilled approach motivations and fulfilled avoidance motivations

flourishing

___________ relationships have thwarted approach motivations and thwarted avoidance motivations

distressed

___________ relationships have thwarted approach motivations and fulfilled avoidance motivations

boring

define the principle of lesser interest

Suggests that the partner who depends less on a relationship has more power in that relationship. Or, the person with less to lose by ending a desired partnership gets to call the shots

The more independent member of a romantic relationship is usually the more dominant of the two

what is the mutual exchange of desirable rewards referred to as?

social exchange

What are the two main reasons for the changes in American attitudes toward same-sex sexuality?

1. Gays and lesbians are more visible in public life than ever before. More contact = more acceptable

2. We understand same-sex sexuality better than we used to. People are more accepting when they believe homosexuality is NOT a choice, but rather a biological influence

True or False:

All couples (regardless of age, gender, or sexuality) are having less sex than our grandparents did at our age

True

___________ have less sex than any other couples do

Lesbians

__________ tend to have higher sex drives

Men

True or False: Men are more likely to cheat than women are

True

Which sociosexual orientation is more likely to cheat or have extradyadic sex?

Unrestricted

What are the two types of sociosexual orientations?

Restricted and unrestricted

What are the 7 main influences that deter condom use when people have sex with a new or temporary partner?

Underestimates of risk

Faulty decision making

Pluralistic ignorance

Inequalities of power

Abstinence education

Low self-control

Decreased intimacy and pleasure

Define stealthing

occurs when one removes a condom just before or during intercourse without his partner's knowledge or consent

define pluralistic ignorance

occurs when people wrongly believe that their feelings and beliefs are different from those of others

Why did Masters & Johnson (1970) conclude as the primary reason that same-sex couples enjoy more satisfying sexual relations than heterosexuals do?

Good communication.

also, both parties being the same sex allowed them to know what they liked themselves, thus predicting what their partners like

What are the two dimensions involved in the four types of sexual violation?

Type of pressure that is applied

Unwanted sexual behavior that results

Sexual violations in quadrant ___ are interactions in which one person coaxes and cons another to submit to touching that he or she doesn't want

quadrant 1

Sexual violations in quadrant ___ are verbal manipulations and/or intentional intoxication that lead to penetration of the genitals

quadrant 2

Sexual violations in quadrant ___ involve various degrees of physical force (or drug-induced stupor that leave the victim unable to resist)

quadrants 3 and 4

Sexual violations in quadrant ___ are most likely to be prosecuted as "forcible rape"

quadrants 3 and 4

People who endorse these ___________ conceive of sexual satisfaction as something you work for; they think that sexual success is malleable and that you can enjoy more of it by striving to attain it

sexual growth beliefs

____________ lead people to think that to have great sex, you just have to find your sexual soulmate; you're sexually compatible with some people and not with others, and that's just the way it is

sexual destiny beliefs

True or False: A strong sexual double standard still exists

False. But, a person's sex can still have some influence on others' evaluation of his or her sexual experiences

Traditionally, women have been judged more harshly than men for being sexually experiences or permissive. Whereas men who have multiple sexual partners may be admired as "studs", women with the same number of partners may be dismissed as "sluts".

What is this an example of?

Sexual double standard

What are the benefits to reproduction according to the good genes hypothesis?

By obtaining commitment and security from one man and having taller, stronger, healthier children with another, women could bear offspring who were especially likely to survive and thrive

The ______________ suggests that some women can profit from a dual mating strategy in which they (a) pursue long-term partners who will contribute resources to protect and feed their offspring while (b) seeking good genes for their children from other men

good genes hypothesis

What are the three types of consensual non-monogamy?

open relationships

swingers

polyamory

In _____ relationships, partners feel free to have sex with others—sometimes going on individual "dates" that they may or may not talk about later—but they agree to avoid any romantic or emotional attachments to those other people

open relationships

_______ pursue extradyadic sex as a couple, having sex, for instance, at parties they both attend; their connections to others are also casual (non-romantic)

swingers

In _______ relationships, the partners have full-fledged love affairs that may be both sexual and romantic relationships with more than one person

polyamorous relationships

______________ is a bias where many of us believe that bad things are generally more likely to happen to others than to us, so we fail to take sensible precautions that would prevent foreseeable dangers

illusion of unique invulnerability

define the illusion of unique invulnerability

a bias where many of us believe that bad things are generally more likely to happen to others than to us, so we fail to take sensible precautions that would prevent foreseeable dangers

define alcohol myopia

Involves the reduction of people's abilities to think about and process all of the information available to them when they are intoxicated

True or False: Sexual attitudes have become more conservative over time

False. they have become more permissive

True or False: Sexual attitudes of Americans are more conservative compared to people in many other countries

True

What is extradyadic sex?

Having sex outside the dyad, or couple, with someone other than one's partner (can be with or without the other partner's knowledge/consent)

What are trait-like collections of beliefs and behaviors that describe our feelings about sex?

sociosexual orientations

People with a _________ sociosexual orientation are generally willing to have sex only in the context of committed and affectionate relationships

restricted

people with a ________ sociosexual orientation do not seek much closeness or commitment before pursuing sex, and are more likely to cheat

unrestricted

Recognize the personal and relational influences that make one prone to jealousy.

Dependence on a relationship affects jealousy, as does feelings of inadequacy, attachment styles, personality traits (negative emotionality)

2. Ponder evolutionary psychology's perspective on sex differences in jealousy.

Sexual selection may have favored men who were suspicious of their partners faithfulness, leading to fear of infidelity as an evolutionarily adaptive trait. For women, sexual selection may have favored women who were suspicious of mens declarations of love and commitment.

Compare lying in close and casual relationships.

Benevolent lies are especially common in close relationships, people tell many lies intended to benefit others. We lie more to casual acquaintances, but we tell more important lies to those close to us.

Recognize the two sides to every betrayal.

People who are betrayed feel it more deeply than the betrayers

51% of betrayers feel that things got worse after betrayal compared to 91% of victims

Understand the ingredients that make forgiveness more likely to occur.

When the offender is genuinely contrite and apologetic, and when the betrayed sets firm boundaries and expectations for future conduct

define mate poaching

going after someone who is already in a relationship with the intent to start your own relationship with them

define reactive jealousy

Occurs in response to finding out that your partner is doing something and you are jealous about. Cheating, talking to someone else, spending time with another person alone, etc.

define deceiver's distrust

people who lie tend to be less trusting of others and assume that they are also liars

define suspicious jealousy

Occurs without basis of fact. A person may be suspicious or fear the loss of their relationship, but the partner has not actually done anything to make them jealous.

define truth bias

we assume that our partners are telling us the truth because we trust and love them. this is good, because you don't want to assume that your partner is lying, but it makes betrayals more devastating

define betrayal

disagreeable, hurtful actions perpetrated by someone we thought that we could trust.

lies, cheating, deception, etc.

consider how we can master our anger

DON'T lash out, take a step back and calm down. Take 6 deep breaths a minute, give yourself space to calm down and continue the conversation when you are steadier.