CFS 3070 Midterm

Why are intimate relationships important?

They matter to the people in them. Psychological and physical consequences.
They matter to people around them. They matter to society

Intimate relationships can buffer threats

Puts people at ease.
People who could hold hands with a partner were calmer while distressed

Intimate relationships affect our happiness and well-being

People in intimate relationships generally experience a higher subjective well-being; higher overall happiness.
End of relationships drop household income 58% when divorce
Household income drops 33% when partners end a cohabitation
Women are particularly affected

Selection effects

People who are happier and healthier are more attractive to potential relationship patterns

Protection effects

Married individuals that are shielded from some potential stressors or negative outcomes

Impact of relationships on physical health

People in happy intimate relationships live longer

Intimate relationships influence the well-being of children

Level of poverty, academic success, behavioral problems, emotional problems

Long term effects of parental relationships

Parental relationship satisfaction: more emotional security, fewer emotional problems, fewer behavioral problems, greater physical health
End of a conflictual marriage is related to positive outcomes for children
End of a less conflictual marriage is related to negative outcomes
Children with parents in unhappy marriages are more likely to have relationship problems of their own- also more likely to raise children who follow their footsteps

Intimate relationships contribute to larger communities

Social control theory
People in committed relationships are less likely to misuse alcohol and drugs
Weaker relationships increase deviant behavior
These effects encourage people to conform to social norms

Intimate relationships determine the survival of our species

Natural selection; social relationships help determine whether a specific gene or set of genes improve fitness; oxytocin- calmness and trust

4 characteristics that make a relationship intimate

Interdependence- partners behaviors affect each other; personal; closeness; potential to be sexual

Intimate relationship

A close relationship that includes some kind of sexual passion that could be expressed and shared

Close relationship

A personal relationship in which partners have strong and frequent influences on each other across a variety of activities

Personal relationship

An interdependent relationship in which the partners consider each other special and unique

Interdependent relationship

A relationship in which the behavior of each participant affects the other. Interdependence is the defining characteristic of any social relationship

7 common attributes of love

Desire, idealization, joy, preoccupation, proximity, prioritizing, caring

Ch 1 Sternberg's theory of love

Passion, intimacy, commitment
Fatuous= passion/ commitment
Consummate= commitment/ intimacy/ passion
Companionate = intimacy/ commitment
Romantic= passion/ intimacy

Evolutionary perspective

Mind has evolved in response to whether an outcome was associated with more or less successful reproduction

Fundamental assumptions of the evolutionary perspective

A feature is adaptive if it helps an organism attract or compete for mates
Sexual selection, natural selection, adaptive features can hinder survival or have nothing to do with it; psychological mechanisms

Theory of parental investment

Females invest more time and resources in raising offspring than males; females have limited children, primary caregiver, children are dependent on the female for a long period of time; males seek mates to maximize offspring; females want companionship

How this this translate to parter preference?

Women prefer strong men who have the resources and intention to stay and help care for their offspring; women are upset about potential emotional infidelity; men prefer women who are likely to invest only in their children; men are upset by women's potential sexual infidelity

Attachment theory

Relationship with primary caregiver

Fundamental assumptions of attachment theory

Behaviors that promote and maintain closeness between infants and their attachment figures

2 dimensions of attachment

Anxiety, beliefs about one's value and self-worth
Avoidance, beliefs about the dependability and trustworthiness of others to meet one's needs

Attachment style in romantic relationships

People's perceptions of their partner's behaviors and their own

Social exchange theory

Social interaction are an attempt to maximize outcomes through the exchange of social goods

Fundamental assumptions of social exchange theory

Rewards are both material (finances) and nonmaterial (partner's social standing); costs are both material (finances) and nonmaterial (missing out on opportunities)

Relationship satisfaction and dependence

Relationship alternatives include all situations outside the current relationship, including being alone; barriers/ obstacles and investment- children

Social learning theory

Rewards and costs in terms of the specific interpersonal behaviors that partners exhibit in their interactions

Fundamental assumptions of social learning theory

When were are pleased or upset by our partners, directly related to their behaviors

Why do people engage in negative behavior?

Coercion theory: people get their partners to pay attention by yelling and screaming
Escape conditioning: stop an uncomfortable interaction by leaving room or crying

Social ecoglogical theories

Embed the couple within reciprocal, nested systems; hazardous work conditions or living in dangerous conditions

The couple in context

Microsystem: comprised of the immediate family and friends of the couple
Mesosystem: microsystem interact; schools/ churches/ neighborhoods
Macrosystem: global and national forces

ABC-X: The foundational social ecological model

A = Stressor: may be positive or negative
•Examples: having a baby, changing jobs, moving, falling sick
B = Resources: may be material or social
•Examples: money, friends who can help, church group
C = Interpretation of the event
•Examples: as a challenge; as a negative experience
X = Crisis: How the couple experiences and responds to the stressor

Accounting for time: The Double ABC-X model

A revision of the original model, the double ABC-X model, includes the element of time:
•Double A = Stress pile-up over time
•Double B = Resources that have been accumulated over time
•Double C = Perception of the accumulation of stressors over time
•Double X = Cumulative experience and reaction to stressors over time

Ch 2: Unifying Themes in theories of intimate relationships

Three unifying themes emerge:

1.Dyadic interaction
2.Individual differences
3.External circumstances
All these theories taken together help provide a picture of how relationships work and guidelines for relationship research.

Understanding relationships involves studying constructs

Relationship scientists are interested in aspects of intimate relationships that are abstract, which makes them very difficult to study systematically.

Psychological constructs are the intangible aspects of relationships, which can't be measured directly.
•Love, trust, commitment, etc.

Researchers rely on operationalization, or translation of the construct into concrete, measurable terms.

Construct validity

This is the degree to which the operationalization that is used reflects the psychological construct of interest.

Self reports

Self-report data is comprised of participants' own accounts of their behaviors, attitudes, and experiences, which are used as the information in a particular research project.
•Open-ended questions: This approach allows the participants to use their own words in response.
Fixed response:In this approach, the same range of choices is presented to each participant

Self report pros and Cons

Pros
•High construct validity if used appropriately
•Some relationship constructs can only be measured by self-report
•No specialized equipment needed
Cons
•Phrasing of questions and of available responses can influence the choice of responses
•Interpretation of the construct
•Memory recall
•Social desirability bias

Observational measures

Observational measures involve watching couples' actual behaviors in relationships.
Partners can be observers of each other.
•But they are subject to sentiment override, which occurs when partners' general feelings about the relationship overwhelm their perceptions of specific aspects.

Observational measures pros and cons

Pros
•Directly observe relationship behaviors
•Doesn't rely on recall
Relatively objective
Cons
•Reactivity: act of observing may change participants' behavior
•Sentiment override
•Interrater reliability: a measure of the extent to which observers agree on an observed behavior

Indirect measures

With indirect measures, the couples being studied either don't know, or can't control, the information they are providing.
One such behavior that couples cannot control, even if they want to, is their reaction time.
Observing a participant's reaction time can reveal their implicit attitudes about the construal.

Indirect measures pros and cons

Pros
•These do not rely memory recall
•Avoids social desirability effect
Cons
•Responses may only be weakly related to constructs of interest

Physiological measures

Physiological measures are physical reactions to experiences.
Pros
•Not subject to reactivity
Cons
•May require expensive equipment

Correlational research

People are measured as they are. This approach examines the degree to which variables are related to each other.

Correlational research pros and cons

Pros
•Can demonstrate positive correlations (e.g., coffee drinking and energy) or negative correlations (e.g., coffee drinking and sleep)
•May provide cross-sectional data
•May be provide longitudinal data
oe.g., daily diary
Cons
•Cannot support causation

Longitudinal research

allows researchers to not only describe associations among variables, but also describe change over time and predict outcomes.
The daily diary approach to longitudinal research asks participants to keep a daily log about a specific area of their relationship.
The experience sampling approach gathers data throughout the day in order to come up with a composite picture of participants' daily experience

Longitudinal research pros and cons

Pros
•Can describe change over time and predict outcomes
•Can examine otherwise impossible or unethical processes
Cons
•Cannot support causal statements
•Time and expense
•Attrition bias, or propensity to lose participants
•Conclusions can be limited

Experimental research

Rather than measuring people as they are, the researchers first put them into different groups, using random assignment.
•Allows for causal conclusions
•Involves: an independent variable (a cause that is tested) and a dependent variable (an effect that is tested)

Experimental research pros and cons

Pros
•Can support causal statements
Cons
•External validity: results may not generalize outside the experimental situation

Archival research

This approach uses preexisting data or information to see if variables are related or groups are different.
•Obituaries may be used to examine whether married people live longer than single people.
Content analysis is a method of coding and interpreting textual data that makes is easier to replicate studies.
•Content analysis quantifies data to allow for comparing data from archival materials.

Ch 3: Archival research pros and cons

Pros
•Inexpensive
•Time-efficient
•Not susceptible to reactivity
Cons
•Lack of control over quality of data collection
•Study design dependent on the design of the original
•Can only examine questions asked in the original study

Sex vs Gender

Sex = biological characteristics
•Primary sex characteristics: biological differences that males and females are born with (e.g., different chromosomes)
•Intersex
•Secondary sex characteristics: biological differences that develop over time (e.g., depth of voice)
Gender = nonbiological characteristics
•Tertiary sex characteristics: behavioral differences (e.g., differences in aggression and interests)

Varieties of gender expression

Gender identity is how we perceive ourselves as masculine or feminine.
•Cisgender: when one's gender identity matches the sex they are assigned at birth
•Transgender: when one's gender identity does not match the sex they are assigned at birth
•Gender expression: fulfilling expectations about gender through interactions and behavior

Androgyny

Androgynous individuals express both masculine and feminine characteristics.
People with an androgynous gender expression:
•Have higher levels of self-esteem
•Have lower levels of anxiety
•Have higher levels of emotional intelligence
•Are more sought-after as partners
•Feel more secure in their relationships
•Are less likely to need help in their relationships

How gender shapes thinking and affects behavior

Gender serves as a schema
•A cognitive representation that organizes ideas and beliefs
Your behavior is affected by your gender identity and gender expression as well as how others perceive your gender.

Measuring gender similarities and differences

Meta-analyses of studies on gender differences suggest that males and females tend to show overlapping distributions on trait
The number that captures the degree of similarity between men and women is called the d statistic.

When d = 0, men and women do not differ on the characteristic.
•If d > 0, men are more likely to have that characteristic.
•If d < 0, women are more likely to have that characteristic.

Explaining gender similarities and differences

For the most part, when individual traits are examined, males and females appear similar.
However, there are patterns of small differences between the sexes across different traits.
Cumulatively, these small differences across traits add up.
Men: •More physically and verbally aggressive than women
•Reduces to d = .17 when individuals are provoked
•More prone to making intrusive interruptions
•More likely to prioritize physical attractiveness when describing their preferences for mates
•More positive attitude about sexual intercourse in an established relationship and in casual relationships
Women:
•More skilled at expressing emotions than men
•More likely to seek out emotional support as a means of coping, and to think about their difficulties
•More likely to emphasize the partner's social class and ambitiousness when describing their preferences for mates
•More likely to feel anxious, guilty, and fearful about sex

The evolutionary view: gender differences are inherited

Behaviors that helped people's genes survive (i.e., that led to the survival of children) thrive.
Gender differences in these behaviors stem from gender differences in procreation.
•Males can have a practically limitless number of children, provided these children have different mothers.
Females can have only a limited number of children

The social structure view: gender differences are learned

It suggests that gender differences arise due to societal expectations.
Because of schemas, certain behaviors are seen as being acceptable for either males or females, but not both.
Pressures of society, rather than pressures of genes, help explain gender differences in behavior.

What implications do overall sex differences have for relationships

Females and males want many of the same things in relationships, such as closeness and intimacy.
However:
•Males tend to think of intimacy more in physical terms, while females tend to think of it in terms of communication.
•Males and females report similar relationship standards, but males are more likely than females to perceive their standards as being met.

Gender and Intimacy

Stereotypically, females are always more interested and more invested in relationships.
However, this is a result of the increase in the manufacturing industry

Relationship awareness

Women talking about their relationships are more likely to:
•Recall more details
•Have greater accuracy
•Express greater emotional range
•Take the couple's perspective

Expressing emotion and caring

Men and women are equally capable of having meaningful conversations.
However, men are more likely to express emotion and deeper connection with women than they are with other men.
Additionally, men are able to be emotionally supportive when their female partners have had a stressful week, but they are also more likely to add criticism.

Interest in sex

Women are socialized into sexuality in an environment in which female bodies are displayed and disparaged, where sex can be source of threat and trauma.
•19% of all U.S. women experience rape (2% of men)
•44% of women experience unwanted sexual contact (23% of men)

Gender differences in sex

•Men have more spontaneous thoughts about sex throughout the day than women.
•Men have greater frequency and variety of sexual fantasies than women.
•Men desire a higher frequency of intercourse than women.
•Men desire a higher number of lifetime sexual partners than women.
•Men masturbate more often than women.
•Men report interest in a wider variety of sexual practices than women.
•Men are less willing to forgo sex than women.
•Men are willing to make greater sacrifices for sexual opportunities than women.
•Men are more likely than women to initiate sex, and less likely than women to refuse it.

Ch 4: relationship endings

Females are more likely to:
•Be attuned to relationship problems
•Initiate seeking therapy
•End the relationship (ask for a divorce and file for divorce)

Experiences and expression of sexual orientation

Sexual orientation is the way in which we pursue love, attachment, and meaningful social connections with people of our same sex, with people of a different sex, or with people of either sex.
Comprised of five closely related factors:
•Romantic attraction
•Sexual arousal
•Sexual attraction
•Sexual behavior
•Sexual identity
Sexual attraction is considered central to one's orientation.

Sexual orientation of women and men

Sexual identity is organized differently for men and women.
•Men are more likely to identify as exclusively straight or exclusively gay.
•Women are more likely to identify between the extremes.
Women demonstrate greater sexual fluidity than men.
•Sexual fluidity is the capacity to become more or less attracted to men or women regardless of one's general sexual orientation.

Asexuality

•Lack of desire or sexual attraction to either sex
•Have no control over the lack of desire
•Consider lack of sexual feelings to be a trait of who they are
•Experience stages of coming out as other sexual minorities

Gender nonconformity is apparent long before sexual orientation emerges

In a longitudinal study,
•Parents rated their 4- to 11-year-old children's behavior as gender conforming or gender nonconforming.
•When the children were contacted 24 years later, those rated as gender nonconforming were 10 times more likely to identify as gay or lesbian.

Social influence

Being raised by same-sex parents does not increase the likelihood of children having same-sex attractions.
Being raised by same-sex parents does not increase the likelihood of children exhibiting gender nonconforming behavior.
In sum, there is little evidence to suggest social influences affect sexual orientation.

Efforts to change sexual orientation: harmful and ineffective

Sexual orientation may be fluid, but it is extremely difficulty to change.
•Despite being raised as girls, boys who lose their genitals identify as a male and are attracted to females.
•1 in 1,000 people who actively attempted to change their sexual orientation were successful.

Biases to avoid in comparing same-sex and different-sex relationships

The sociocultural context of same-sex relationships is different than it was ten years ago.
•Differences may lead to selection biases.
Assumption of representation
•We cannot assume that one couple represents an entire group.
Heteronormativity
•The mistaken assumption that heterosexuality is the ideal, desirable, or optimal

Stigma and Prejudice

People in same-sex relationships encounter bullying, discrimination, harassment, and rejection.
•Discriminatory experiences are known to be highly correlated with mental health issues.
•Sexual minorities have higher rates of anxiety, depression, substance abuse, and suicidality.
Even when barriers are removed, prejudice and discrimination will remain a way of life for same-sex couples.

Internalized homonegativity

Some people in same-sex relationships develop internalized homonegativity, which involves directing the negative social attitudes toward themselves.
•Leads to a devaluation of the self
•Results in internal conflicts
•Damages self-esteem
•Weakens relationships
•Encourages judgmental attitudes toward one's partner

Communication, cooperation and conflict

Repeated stressful experiences can lead to decreased satisfaction and decreased intimacy in same-sex relationships.
Same-sex couples build resiliency through teaming up to deal with the adversities they encounter.
•Include painful experiences in their shared narrative
•Engage in communities of support, or "families of choice"
•Seek emotional support from their peers in same-sex relationships.
•Bypass gender differences and power imbalances through active negotiation

Same-sex and different-sex couples are more similar than different

All couples, regardless of sexual orientation, share:
•Desire for the same traits in mates: intelligence, sense of humor, honesty
•Aspirations for love, faithfulness, and lifelong commitment
•Highly value intimate contact, emotional connection, trust, and open communication
•Argue about the same topics
•Invest in parenting similarly
•Experience similar levels of closeness
•Experience similar changes in happiness over time

Division of labor

Same-sex partners are much more likely to emphasize equity and fairness.
•Women in straight couples do 1.6 times as much household labor as men.

Ch 5: Resolving conflict

Same-sex couples are much more likely to use humor and affection to resolve conflict.
•Different-sex couples tend to become belligerent, domineering, and whiny.

Personality traits and emotional tendencies

•Personality:
oTraits that are stable over time
oTraits that go together to form a coherent picture of someone
•Trait approach:
oHow relationship scientists study personality

How do individual differences matter in relationships

•Relationship expectations
•Perceptions of their partner
•Relationship behaviors

Negative affectivity

Aspects of negative affectivity include
•Low self-esteem
•Anxiety
•Hostility
•Self-consciousness
•Pessimism

Agreeableness

•Related to relationship satisfaction
Partners of people low in agreeableness feel the partner disparages them

Consequences of negative affectivity and low self-esteem

1.Low self-esteem
•Like other aspects of personality, low self-esteem tends to be relatively stable over time.
•Self-esteem contributes to relationship functioning, both through behavior and through perceptions of the partner's behavior.
2.Underestimating the partner's regard for self
3.Perceiving the partner in an unfavorable light
4.Perceiving the relationship in an unfavorable light

Measures of personality in childhood

Personality traits exhibited in childhood can predict relationship satisfaction later in life.
•Aggression in children under 10 is linked to higher rates of divorce.
•Anxious children tend to have lower relationship satisfaction.
•Children with poor impulse control have higher rates of conflict.

Measures of personality in adulthood

Personality traits in adults are linked to relationship outcomes.
•Those with high levels of negative affectivity have poor relationship outcomes in general.
•Personality traits can predict which couples will divorce and which will not.
Agreeableness and conscientiousness are linked to positive relationship outcomes

Childhood experiences in families

•Early experience in our family of origin makes a difference in our relationship expectations and experiences.
•Some aspects of this early experience are
oParents' relationship with each other
oOur relationship with our parents
Intergenerational transmission effects: The relationships of people's parents are related to their own relationships.
•Parental conflict is related to children's subsequent divorce likelihood.
•Parental marital satisfaction is related to children's subsequent marital satisfaction.
Parents'relationship behavior is related to children's subsequent relationship behavior

How childhood experiences influence later relationships

1.Children with turbulent family backgrounds are more cautious toward relationships, and more accepting of divorce.
2.Children from unstable families have less money and smaller social networks in adulthood.
3.Children from unstable families experience more relationship distress.

The social learning theory view

•The social learning theory view on intergenerational transmission of relationship behaviors
•Children learn emotional and behavioral models by observing and interacting with their families of origin.
oNurturing relationships with parents lead people to feel more connected to a partner.
oAbuse and neglect predict less fulfilling adult intimate relationships.
High-conflict families predict the use of less positive communications behaviors

The attachment theory view

Attachment style: stems from children's relationship with their parents
•Based on people's views of themselves and their views of others
•Involves two dimensions:
oAnxious
oAvoidance

Working models of attachment theory

Self-relevant aspect of anxiety: When caregivers are inconsistent and unavailable, we feel anxious, insecure, inadequate, and unworthy of care and attention.
Other-relevant aspect of avoidance: When we conclude that others are unreliable and are best avoided.
•People who are low in anxiety and avoidance are considered to be securely attached
•People who perceive themselves to be low in self-worth and others to be unapproachable are considered to be insecurely attached.

Attachment style and seeking comfort

Behavioral differences in people with different attachment styles can be clearly seen when they are experiencing stress:
•People with secure attachment styles turn to their partner for comfort.
People with avoidant attachment styles avoid their partner as they experience higher levels of stress

Ch 6: Overcoming insecurity

Research demonstrates solutions to decrease insecurity in relationships:
•Deepening self-affirmation
•Adopting your partner's perspective
•Elaborating on a compliment
•Increasing your psychological and physical closeness

Physical appearance

Physical apperance is the only predictor of whether randomly paired individuals will go on a date with each other.
Physical appearance is equally important to women and men,
Women are more selective in whom they rate as attractive, but they are more willing to express interest in people they did not rate as attractive.
Men are less selective about whom they rate as attractive, but they are only likely to express interest in people they rated as attractive.
Matching phenomenon: People tend to have relationships with others whom they rate to be of a similar level of attractiveness as themselves.
People who were rated as less attractive were more likely to ask out others who had been rated less attractive than they were to ask out people who had been rated as more attra

How much does physical appearance matter?

People like those who are more attractive.
However, people worry about being rejected:
They tend to ask out those who have about the same level of physical attractiveness that they do
Physical appearance goes beyond who it is you will be staring at across the dinner table.
People tend to have a "what is beautiful is good" stereotype:
People (both children and adults) think that attractive others (both children and adults) are smarter, friendlier, and nicer overall

Features of appealing faces

•People with symmetrical faces
•People whose facial features look like an average of many people's facial features

Personal characteristics

Vertical attributes are qualities that can be ranked in hierarchical order.
•Physical appearance
•Health status
•Personality
Horizontal attributes are qualities that cannot be judged as better or worse than the others.
•Food preferences
•Hobbies
•Career choices

Top 10 positive and negative personality traits

Most attractive: sincere, honest, understanding, loyal, truthful, trustworthy, intelligent, dependable, open-minded, thoughtful
Least attractive: deceitful, malicious, dishonorable, obnoxious, untruthful, dishonest, cruel, mean, phony, liar