Laurel lines

HOST: Let’s get to know our contestants! We can start with you, what’s your name, how old are you, and what do you do for fun

My name is Laurel I am 19, and I have recently gotten really invested in computer programming

HOST: sorry I think you misunderstood, the question was what do you do for fun

that is what I do for fun

HOST: after being eaten, turkeys are known to cause sleepiness due to a chemical compound called “tryptophan”. What is the exact breakdown of the chemical “tryptophan”?

oh gosh, i.. I don’t know

HOST: 10 seconds

Maybe like frankincense and myrrh?

(MUFFIN MAN) HOST: C11H12N2O2

So close!

SAMANTHAR: how could he have possibly gotten it right?

no one has ever been able to answer a question correctly before!

HOST: Laurel, Ms computer programmer, how many have you solved?

good luck beating this! I solved one whole half of a problem!

HOST: close behind is Samantharr-Rose Emaline Mcbethany with 0 points

arent you forgetting someone?

HOST: oh right! And Laurel with -1

hows that even possible?!?! (Starts to cry)

HOST: ok and on to our-(cut off)

you know what, no... NO! All my life ive dreamed of riding horseback through the sunset of the Tokyo skyline, and even though this has nothing to do with that, I STILL DREAMED IT! Point is, Im NOT going to get PUSHED AROUND! and forgotten anymore! Im just not!

SAMANTHARR-ROSE EMALINE MCBETHANY: can you shut up

ok (sad)

HOST: Now, ms... Laurel. Are you ready for your SUDDEN DEATH question?

i assume so

HOST: Name this character: chubby man, often late to class and occasionally the bus on school trips, he finds himself stuck in the choir room and is VERY Greek!

OH GOSHI I. I don't know, looks like im out... another loss for little old laurel. (really sad) You know what?! NO! Max, I would like to phone a friend!

Well then laurel, here you go!

But wait, how am I supposed to call anyone in here? There's one button.... with a crown on it

HOST: looks like it's time to press that button Laurel!

o-k? I guess so

the queen of england? You couldn't get contestants but you found the queen of England?

HOST: ha! right ... real funny

ok ms. ugh your heignessnessess, queen lizzy! I need your hel-

QUEEN LIZZY: i can't hear you dear you'll have to be louder

(louder) I need your-

QUEEN LIZZY: Louder than that!

I need your hel-

QUEEN LIZZY: LOUDER!

I NEED YOUR HELP

QUEEN LIZZY: ha ha ha ha snorts ha im just messing with you i can hear fine, what can i help you with?

we need to ask you a question to win trivia!

QUEEN LIZZY:Oh my!

What is it?

QUEEN LIZZY: well it seems that since i move to slow, i missed the big news!

what news?

QUEEN LIZZY: um (chuckle), well dear...i died (collapses to the floor)

n00000000 how will i get my answerrr.

Whaaaaaaaa