Eternal Family Exam 3

What are the 11 "markers of adulthood"?

Acquiring an adult sense of mission, establishing personal goals and routines, managing physical self-care, increasing financial independence, creating a home, shifting our sense of family, learning skills of emotional connection, building a community, supporting the next generation, growing in spiritual responsibility, building the kingdom.

Why is differentiating "happiness" from "meaning" important?

meaning transcends the self while happiness is all about giving the self what it wants. People who have high meaning in their lives are more likely to help others in need.

In study, researchers found that the pursuit of a "happy life" was more strongly associated with being a ____________ while the pursuit of a "meaningful life" was more strongly associated with being a ____________. 

taker… giver

What sets human beings apart from animals is ________________________. 

not the pursuit of happiness but the pursuit of meaning.

The Prophet Joseph Smith taught that “friendship is ___________________”

is one of the grand fundamental principles of ‘Mormonism.’”

What is a possible reason Elder Marlin Jensen suggests for why the scriptures make little specific mention of the principle of friendship?

is because it should be manifest quite naturally as we live the gospel.

What is a particular challenge Elder Marlin Jensen suggests Latter-day Saints may face in establishing and maintaining friendships?

feeling busy and tired

What is vulnerability and how might we think about vulnerability as a spiritual discipline? 

TEDTalk

What are the five truths Sister Oaks teaches?

The Lord loves us, He answers prayers, and, most importantly, He delights in blessing those who keep His commandments—but He does so in His own time and His own way. We are not saved in isolation. Our responsibility is to become the best disciples of Christ we can become. Learn to recognize the whisperings of the Holy Ghost in your life. All singles should remain active members of the Church.

According to Sister Oaks, our first focus, rather than being on marriage, should be on __________.

being a disciple of Jesus Christ.

According to Thomas Holman, what does prophetic counsel teach us about finding a marriage partner?

takes spiritual sensitivity, maturity, and preparation—including preparing ourselves to be the right spouse.

What is/are "fiction and an illusion," and why?

Soulmates, yet it is certain that almost any good man and any good woman can have happiness and a successful marriage if both are willing to pay the price.”

"Before we start holding others up to scrutiny to see if they are worthy of us, maybe we ought ______________ "

to work first on becoming a “right person” for someone else.

While we can't change our gene pool, we can do what that will affect marriage? 

how to respond to the events and conditions of our upbringing, and courtship is one of the most opportune times to do so.

We should make sure the decision to marry is based on _____________, not _____________ or _____________.  

make is based on inspiration, not infatuation or desperation.

What is the "inherent risk" Elder Robbins described in the expression "fall in love"?

involved in selecting the verb fall because it mostly means accidental, involuntary, with no choice involved. And subtly, it has also led to the use of its distressing corollary, "We fell out of love," an all too common phrase used nowadays as an excuse for a failed marriage. "Falling in love" and "falling out of love" are phrases that make love sound like something out of our control.

Elder Robbins explained what set apart the attributes from 1 Corinthians 13 from the Worlds list of necessary attributes. What was that difference? 

Your success in marriage will largely depend on your ability to reverse this cartoon and focus on improving yourself, rather than trying to reshape your spouse

what is "the Lord's list of 14 behaviors" that Elder Robins identified "showing how he loved the church and apply it to the loving relationship that should exist between sweethearts"? 

suffereth long, kind, envieth not, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provokes, thinketh no evil, rejoices not in iniquity but in the truth, beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endures all things, charity never faileth.

 "When the Lord uses the command form of the verb love in 'Thou shalt love thy wife with all they heart, and shall cleave unto her and none else' (D&C 42:22), ________________."

He is not leaving this love in Cupid's hands. His commandment is a directive, not to the heart, but with the heart, and to the mind with an expectation of thought, reasoning, decision making and obedience--you can't fall out of love if it's a commandment to stay in love.

Since love is a verb, feelings of love _____________. 

is the fruit of love.

“Because there is no such thing as soul mates or a one and only, it would be more appropriate _____________." 

a prayer to ask Father in Heaven if this is "a one," than to ask Him if this is "the one."

What is "agency-based love"?

“Because love is as much a verb as it is a noun, the phrase ‘I love you’ is as much a promise of behavior and commitment as it is an expression of feeling.”

While feelings of love and happiness are indeed present in good marriages, they are best understood as  _____________." 

as the fruits of those relationships, not necessarily the roots.

What is the "staying power" in marriage? 

it means that on our own, none of us will individually have enough feelings of love to keep our marriage and family relationships going strong through the natural ups and downs of life. We will need to become more than we naturally are.

What are the three interconnected dimensions of "mature love"? How does this contrast with "immature love"? 

an emotional dimension, consisting of our feelings and emotions; a cognitive dimension, made up of our attitudes, priorities, and choices; and a behavioral dimension, consisting of our actions and behaviors. Mature love is contrasted with what she calls immature love, which primarily emphasizes the emotional dimension alone and makes the practice of loving choices and behaviors conditional and contingent upon the emotional state of the relationship

What should you do if you want capability, safety, and security in dating and romance?

Be a true disciple of Jesus. Be a genuine, committed, word-and-deed Latter-day Saint. Believe that your faith has everything to do with your romance, because it does.

What are the five principles for creating love in our relationships? 

Thoughtful service, commitment, equal partnership, practicing virtues, sincere discipleship,

Why did Brother Turley share the reality that many of our hopes and dreams will likely not come true? 

Bending our will to the Lord’s may be our greatest challenge in life. He knows better than we do what is best for us and allows us to face agony that at times seems unbearable.

What does Brother Turley say are the two components of true love? 

selfless attitude and selfless action

True love in its fullness will come only _____________.

over time as our commitment and faithfulness is tested.

What is the "antithesis of love"? 

selfishness

What did Prabhu say he and his wife knew when they got married?

they knew that there would be differences because they were raised differently. but they knew they would need to find common ground

What did Divya say love mainly depends on?

it depends our understanding

What kind of love story were Prabhu and Divya telling, that is “perhaps even better than what they see in the movies”?

more through acts of service and care than through words,

"Sexual feelings are an ____________ of God’s plan to create _________________." 

important part…happy marriages and eternal families.

When keeping sex and sexual feelings sacred, what do we show Heavenly Father?

you honor and respect the sacred power to create life.

How does the Savior feel about victims of any kind of abuse or assault?

they have not sinned. The Savior loves you. He wants to help you, heal you, and give you peace.

What are the dangers of sexual fragmentation?

articularly harmful because it gives powerful physiological rewards which, though illusory, can temporarily persuade us to overlook the serious deficits in the overall relationship.

What did Elder Holland refer to as "drugstore psychology"?

“He just can’t help himself. His glands have complete control over his life—his mind, his will, his entire future.”

Elder Holland said we "will never be more like God at any other time in this life than when ______________."

than when you are expressing that particular power. (self control)

"The eternal importance of the law of chastity can only be understood within _________________."

within the overarching context of our Heavenly Father’s plan of happiness for His children.

What is one of the great ironies of eternity related to the law of chastity? 

is that the adversary, who is miserable precisely because he has no physical body, entices us to share in his misery through the improper use of our bodies.

"_____________ is to our spirit as pain is to our bodies."

Guilt

What are the three types of temptations that Elder Holland talks about?

Appeals to appetite, temptations of the spirit, ??????

What does President Oaks describe as the four levels of involvement with pornography? Why is this differentiation important? 

Inadvertent exposure, occasional use, intensive use, compulsive use

What are the five "basic principles" President Oaks identifies as necessary to repenting from pornography use?

humility, discipleship, commitment to a personal plan for change, accountability and support, and enduring in faith.

What is essential to our becoming like our heavenly parents?

Our divine understanding and use of sexual intimacy

What kind of life that God enjoys, can only be achieved through complete fidelity to our spouse?

Eternal Life?????

God’s laws are not _________.

negotiable.

What is the 48 hour rule? 

If one of them was upset about something the other did or didn’t do, he or she had 48 hours following the “offense” to talk with the offender about it. If they didn’t bring up what was troubling them within 48 hours, it was not fair to bring it up after that time period.

What does "burying weapons of war" have to do with preparing for sexual intimacy? 

These weapons of war are thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that keep spouses feeling separate and single within their marriages.

How can focusing on "love-generating images" prepare one for sexual intimacy? 

One day in prayer the wife was blessed with powerful, positive images of her husband. These images came into her mind and stayed in her heart. In her prayerful, seeking state, she was given to understand that these were sacred images of her husband’s premortal self. As she mentally embraced these images, her heart was irresistibly drawn out to her husband in a manner unlike anything she had previously experienced. And each time the wife brought these images to her mind, she experienced a heightened appreciation for her husband and a desire to unite her life with his in every way.

What are the three ways to foster open communication about sexuality listed under “How to Talk about Sexuality”

start when kids are young and call body parts by their names,