Godspell Judas Lines

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You vipers’ brood! who warned you to escape from the coming retribution? Then prove your repentance by the fruit it bears. Already the axe is laid to the roots of the trees; and every tree that fials to produce good fruit shall be cut down and thrown on the fire. I baptize you with water, for repentance sake… But he who comes after me is mightier than I. I am not fit to take off his shoes. He will baptize you with the holy spirit and fire.

Jesus: Okay

Do you come to me?

Jesus: Yeah I wanna get washed up.

I need rather be baptized by you

All: Yay! What a great master etc.

Wait a minute! That’s not the end of the story. No sooner had the man gone out than he met a fellow servant who owed him a few dollars. He gripped him by the throat and said:

Violet: “Pay you what you owe me”

The man threw himself at his fellow servant’s feet and begged him, saying:

Jesus:… So if someone slaps you on the right cheek, turn and offer him your left.

Oh, Jeeeeeesus Chri…

Alina: It’s a secret!

What the Good Master is telling us is that when God tells a little secret on us, the angels write it down in a big burn book…

Beginning of Parable 5: Lazarus and the Rich Man

There was once a rich man who dressed in purple and the finest linen,… (Drag hank to center and present him)

Hank: You’re fired!

…and every day feasted in great magnificence.

Hank: I like my steak done medium well, if you can’t do that, you’re fired.

At his gate lay a poor man named Lazarus…

Anthony and Elijah: Lazarus! Come on down!

…who would have been glad to have satisfied his hunger with the scraps from the rich man’s table.

Audience Member: Hi, I’m Lazaurs. Would it be possible to have a scrap of bread from your table? or a Pop-Tart?

Even the doggy-doggies used to come and lick his open, running sores.

Anthony and Elijah pretend to lick Lazarus

Well, one day Lazarus died…(Big Pause as he dies) and was carried away…

Elijah: Get up!

…to be with Abraham and the angels (Pause) the rich man also died and was buried in Hades…

Hank: What is this, a Hilton?

…where he was in torment!

Demons attack Hank

He looked up and there, far away, was Abraham with Lazarus close beside him.

Jesus: For theirs is the kingdom of Heaven!

Blessed are you (Pause for reaction) When men shall revile you and persecute you and say all manner of evil against you…falsely.

Jesus: Now- how can you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye when all the time there’s this great plank in your own?

I don’t know. How can you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye when all the time there’s this great plank in your own?

Jesus: Or- How can you take the speck of sawdust out of your brother’s eye when all the time there’s this great plank in your own?

I don’t know. How can you take the speck of sawdust out of your brother’s eye when there’s this great plank in your own?

Jesus: You hypocrite! (Judas Gasp) First you take the plank out of your own eye so you can see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s

(Sarcastic) I’m sorry, I just can’t see it that way.

Maggie: Who sent him on the farm to mind the swine.

(Ordering Elijah) Swine!

Jun-He/Maggie: And the festivities began!

Now, the elder son was out on the farm, working! whew And on his way back, as he approached the house, he heard the music and dancing. He called out to one of the servants and askedhim what it meant. The Servant said:

The servant said…

(With Violet) “Uh, uh, uh your nephew— nope, nope, nope, your cousin— nope, nope, your brother, yup, your brother’s come back home again and your father’s killed the fatted calf ‘cause he has him back safe and sound, yup, yup, yup”

Violet: Yup, yup, yup

but the brother was… (Anthony reacts) irritated.

Anthony: Oh C’mon

He was pretty damned mad! And refused to go in the house. The father came out and pleaded with him but he retorted, in (dance,song,pantomime)

Anthony acts out speech

(With Anthony) “You know how much I’ve worked for you all these years and I never once disobeyed your orders and you never gave me so much as a kid for a feast with my friends. But! Once this son of yours turns up, after running through your money with his women, you kill the fatted calf for him”

Anthony: you kill the fatted calf for him.

(With Jun-he) “My boy,” said the father “You are always with me and everything I have is yours. Now, how could we help but celebrate this happy day, for your brother here was dead and has come back to life— meatphorically speaking— was lost and is found”

Jesus: He went to the first and said “My son, go and work in the vineyard today”

“I will go”

Jesus: Said the boy, but he never went. Then the father said to the second, “Now go my son, go and work in the vineyard today”

“I will not go”

Hank: Master, you are an “honest man.” Give us your ruling on this: Are we ir are we not permitted to pay taxes on the Roman Emperor?

You hypocrites! (Lunge at Pharisees)

Alina (singing): By my side

Then the man they called Judas Iscariot went to the chief priests and said: “What will you give me to betray him to you?” They paid him thirty pieces of silver.

Kali: Can it be me, Lord

Rabbi, can you mean me?

Jesus: And then they will say to him:

(Offnight) Master, when was it we say you hungry and gave you food or thirsty and gave you drink?