Chp 9: Relationship Maintenance

Spiraling inversion

________ - cycle back and forth from attending to each others needs.

Relationships

________ are always in the process of becoming and are not static.

Everyday talk

________ is as important, if not more so, than the "bigger "conversations in relationships.

Segmentation

________- talk about some things and not others.

Deliberate confidants

________- those we intentionally share private information.

Boundary turbulence

________ occurs when information shared is revealed to others.

Relationships

________ are made up from and managed through conversations /talking.

Relationship Maintenance

the work we do to keep a relationship going and in a condition with which both partners are happy

Meta-communicative

communication about communication

Social Exchange Theory

a theory suggesting that relationship behavior is regulated by the evaluation of perceived rewards and costs of the interaction by both sides

Minimax Principle

principle describing the tendency to maximize the benefits and minimize the costs in relationships

Comparison Level

our general expectations of a certain type of relationship, such as a friendship or romantic relationship

Comparison Level of Alternatives

expectations arising from comparing existing relationships to other possible relationships

Communication Privacy Management

a theory that offers a map of the way people manage private matters that are shared with others

Boundary linkage

the practice of sharing private information with another individual

Everyday talk

interaction that includes mundane, ordinary conversations across our daily experience, making up our relationships in addition to the more noticeable, "bigger" moments, such as our first big fight or a marriage ceremony

Dialectical tensions

tensions that occur because we simultaneously have several essential yet oppositional needs or desires within our relationships

Connection and autonomy

the internal dialectical tension of integration and separation; spending time with a partner and spending time alone

Inclusion and seclusion

the external dialectical tension of integration and separation; spending time alone as a couple and spending time as a couple with others

Certainty and uncertainty

the internal form of the stability and change dialectic; the desire to count on things to occur and the desire to have novelty in the relationship

Openness and closedness

the internal form of the expression and nonexpression dialectic; refers to the degree of disclosure partners have with one another

Balance

method of managing tensions that takes place when we try to find a compromise that allows us to partly fill each need while also sacrificing some of each need

Integration

method of managing tensions that takes place when you are able to completely fulfill both opposing forces at the same time without sacrificing part of either one

Reaffirmation

method of managing tensions that involves accepting that you cannot reconcile the contradiction and celebrate what the dialectical tension means for the couple's unity