Chapter 6 Interpersonal Communication

Hearing

is physiological. Each person either has the ability to hear, or they do not have the ability to hear. Hearing is the process wherein sound waves strike the eardrum and cause vibrations that are transmitted to the brain. "

Listening

occurs when the brain reconstructs these electrochemical impulses into a representation of the original sound and then gives them meaning. Many times we hear but we are not listening!

Mindless Listening

Involves reacting to others' messages automatically and routinely without much mental investment. This listening does not involve careful attention and analysis. It is unrealistic to listen to absolutely everything you hear in a day

Mindful Listening

Involves giving careful and thoughtful attention and responses to the messages we receive. We tend to listen mindfully when a message is important to us and others we care about. Effective listening involves time, concentration, and work.

Receiving

physiological aspect of listening

Attending

Psychological process. We filter out some messages and focus on others based on ourneeds, wants, desires, and interests. We often attend to stimuli that are visually or audibly stimulating

Interpreting

involves integrating both visual and auditory cues to make sense of, or attribute meaning to, what we hear. Knowledge about the source of the message is also very helpful. There is NO guarantee of understanding.

Recalling

involves the ability to remember. It is a function of several factors: the number of times the information is heard or repeated, how much information there is to store in the brain

Evaluating

occurs when one assesses the validity and credibility of the message. In essence, we are judging the speaker's comments.

Responding

Giving observable feedback including both appropriate verbal and nonverbal responses.

Comprehensive

the type of listening we engage in with the goal of understanding information

Evaluative

fulfills the goal analysis and evaluation of a message. allows us to assess whether people in our lives are being candid, genuine and truthful. These responses appraise the sender's thoughts or behaviors in some way. May be favorable (e.g., "That's a good idea") or unfavorable (e.g., "An attitude like that won't get you anywhere"). Negative evaluations usually make matters worse

Discriminative

involves a unique function of listening that occurs during the receiving stage of the listening process and involves the ability to discern sounds (e.g., an automotive mechanic is likely skilled at listening to the sounds that a car makes when in need of repair).

Appreciative

involves listening for enjoyment

empathetic

occurs when a listener acknowledges the content and legitimacy of a speaker's perceptions. communicates their interest and concern through nonverbal (e.g., eye contact, facial expression, posture, proxemics, and touch) and verbal responses

People-Oriented

these listeners tune into people's emotions, feelings and moods. They tend to relatemore to relationship building when listening to someone. These people are often considered the typeof people that will "lend you an ear" while not judging you

Action-Oriented

this listener values clear, organized, and error-free messages. This type of listening style is common when receiving instruction (e.g., "What are the directions?" or "What do I need to do next?")

Content-Oriented

these listeners favor technical, complex or challenging information. They prefer tohear all of the information being presented before forming any sort of judgment. This listener constantly evaluates and analyzes information. Common professions are politicians, judges, academics

Time-Oriented

these listeners want the person to get to their point of the story quickly. Many timesthey avoid eye contact and tend to interrupt to move the communication along and end it promptly.You CAN control the way you listen!

Information Overload

It is impossible to carefully listen to everything we hear. Too much information is coming in that makes the communication overwhelming.

Prejudging

involves the act of being closed-minded. These could be based on age, race, sexual preference, occupation, political affiliation, etc. This may make it hard to listen because you may disagree with them.

Rate of Speech and Thought

We have a lot of "spare time" to spend with our minds while someone is talking. We are capable of understanding speech rates up to 600 words per minute and the average person speaks between 100-140 words per minute. Instead of letting your mind wonder, spend that spare time understanding the speaker's ideas.

Internal and External Distractions

Distractions involve being wrapped up in our own personal concerns (i.e., your own distracting thoughts and feelings). Distractions come from the physical environment (e.g., technology, TV)

Pseudo-Listening

Pretending to Pay attention

Narcissistic-Listening

self-centered and self-absorbed listening wherein the listener tries to make the interaction about themselves (i.e., stage hog). Expressing your ideas without inviting others to express their ideas.

Insensitive Listening

focuses only on the content part of the meaning. Nonverbal cues are not focused on

Selective Listening

Responding to only a part of a speaker's remarks that interest you, while ignoring/rejecting everything else

Interrupting

an intentional or unintentional act of delaying or preventing another from communicating

Defensive Listening

Taking innocent comments as personal attacks. Perceiving an attack where one does not exist

Aggressive

Listening carefully to collect information to attach the other person.

Narcissistic Listening

self-centered and self-absorbed listening wherein the listener tries to make the interaction about themselves (i.e., stage hog). Expressing your ideas without inviting others to express their ideas.

Principles of Active Listening

You should strive to listen to understand the other person AND convey to them that you really are listening! (1) Give them your undivided attention; (2) Repeat what you just heard (i.e.,paraphrase); (3) Ask the speaker to expand or clarify if there is something that you do not understand; (4) Listen for Requests