4. reduce defensiveness in others (all done PP)

Problem: Evaluation

Gibbs category - Adler

Antidote = Description
(neutral facts avoiding loaded words)
- say: “I”
- avoid “loaded words” / judgment
—
Eval = accusatory/blaming


loaded words/accusatory/blame vs. neutral statements with facts

Problem: controlling

Gibbs category - Adler

Antidote = problem oriented

know it all (don’t wanna hear your concerns) vs. working together for win-win situation

Problem: strategic

Gibbs category - Adler

Antidote = spontaenous

manipulate/decieve vs. open-honest, unambigious,

Problem: indifferent

Gibbs category - Adler

Andtitote = empathetic

lack of concern vs. walking a mile in another persons shoes (try to relate and support)

Problem: superior

Gibbs category - Adler

Andidote = equality

dominance vs. giving everybody a chance (justice/fairness)

Problem: Certainty

Gibbs category - Adler

Antidote = provisional

overconfidence (i’m right, you’re worng) (million times) vs. open minded, being able to adapt (i’d love to learn)

What is EVALUATIVE language?

implies you are judging a person

-using a lot of “you”

Why are “I” statements so important?

reduces DEFENSIVENESS

-take responsibility for what you think, & don’t blame others

additional info

1) only use “you” when complimenting/praising

2) “we” = inclusive/cohesion

3) neg: “we” can speak improerly for others

4) combine “I” w/ “we” language

(practice)

slide 40 and onwards = practice

all done