UC Davis CMN 120 Section and EXAM #2 Flashcards

Types of Families

- family of origin

- family of procreation

- nuclear family

- extended family

- blended family

- nontraditional families

family of origin

the family you were born in

family of procreation

the family you helped to create

The Nuclear Family

aka 'immediate family' - includes adopted children and now LGBTQIA parents

soon to be classified as a nontraditional family

extended family

'non immediate family' - grandparents, aunts, uncles

blended families

a family consisting of a couple and their children from this and all previous relationships

Nontraditional Parenting

Single-parented, cohabiting parents, polygamous families

As in all significant relationships, _____________ plays a big part in making or breaking family relationships

communication

What are some family roles?

The recurrent patterns of behavior that individuals fulfill family functions (such as the 'breadwinner' of the family)

____________ effect is present in all relationships

Interactional effect

Process roles

focus on the socio-psychological functioning of families (ie 'peacemaker')

Parentification

refers to when parents act in such ways that force children to take on parental roles

family rituals

repetitive behaviors that have special meaning for a group or relationship

research pointed out that there is a need for blended families to create rituals

family stories

particular stories that we've heard over and over again from family members - give them a sense of history and reinforce connections across generations

What are 2 Common Characteristics of Family Stories?

(1) They’re told and retold again over a long period of time

(2) They convey an underlying message about the family

Family Secrets

Secrets families have intentionally kept hidden, containing info the family considers private and inappropriate for sharing w/others

T/F: Family secrets can be kept within families

true

family secrets are done to protect private info, also reinforcing family(s) ________ and ________

identity, exclusivity

What are 2 Common Characteristics of Friendships

(1) Friendships are voluntary

(2) They usually are peers

T/F: Friendships are like a social contract to which both parties agree

True - friendships are governed by rules

How do friendships differ by sex?

Males and females maintain their relationships the same, however they value friendship differently

- women value conversational and emotional expressiveness

- men value shared activities and interests

T/F: Men and women report different valuing of friendships and levels of closeness

False - they report the same level of closeness and valuing, they just value different things

3 Challenges of Cross-sex Friendships

(1) The Emotional Bond Challenge - is it romantic or platonic?

(2) The Sexual Challenge - potential sexual attraction

(3) Public Presentation - others wondering if there is something going on between the 'two of them'

Friends with benefits

platonic friends who decide to have sex but stay friends - common on college campuses

- they often establish rules to maintain the frienship

T/F: friends with benefits run less smoothly if their social network is approving of them

False - they run more smoothly if their social network is approving of them

What does the saying 'friendships have a lifespan' mean?

Friendships aren’t permanent; they can either (1) grow to dislike each other or (2) the friends’ lifestyles or circumstances can change

Are Workplace Relationships Voluntary?

No, Regular friendships and Workplace friendships are the main differences between them both

T/F: having positive relationships with co-workers increases job satisfaction

True - It leads to people falling in love w/their jobs alongside their co-workers

What complicates the relationships between superior and subordinates?

The power difference between one another

What are the 4 Expectations of Romantic Relationships?

(1) Exclusive

(2) Voluntary

(3) Based on Love

(4) Involve Commitment

What are the 3 Precursors to Attraction?

(1) Micro-environmental - specific situations within the larger situation (ie music festival)

(2) The Social Network - matchmaking

(3) Proximity - seeing the person regularly

6 predictors of attraction

(1) Physical Attractiveness

(2) Rewarding communication (warm positive interactions)

(3) The ‘Hard-to-Get’ Phenomenon

(4) Chemists between people

(5) Similarity

(6) Opposites attract

T/F: In some relationships, people revise their initial impressions of others

True - changes to what they initially thought about them

The Matching Hypothesis

suggests that instead of gettin the most attractive ppl we can find, we are often attracted to ppl who have roughly the same level of overall physical attractiveness as themselves

Choosing a partner of similar attraction will ________ their changes of rejection

minimize

The Hard-to-Get Phenomenon

when certain people are attracted to someone who is ‘hard to get’ and like the challenge of winning them over and becoming lovers in the end

What is the main basis for long term happiness in successful relationships

similarly - having things in common or having the same deep values as each other

What are the 5 Stages of Coming Together by Mark Knapp?

(1) Initiating, (2) Experimenting, (3) Intensifying, (4) Integrating and (5) Bonding

______________ is the mechanisms that takes us along the stages of coming together

Self-Disclosure (SD)

self disclosure

the action of intentionally giving others information about ourselves that we believe to be true and think the receiver doesn't know about us

The Dialectal Perspective of Self-Disclosure

People have individual ideas about openness and secrecy, therefore it can be hard to manage when and what to disclose when talking to others

T/F: Self Disclosure is a quick process

False - self disclosure is a gradual process

T/F: Self disclosure is usually reciprocated

True - Self Disclosure is the most reciprocated form of communication

What 2 Things Influence Self-Disclosure?

(1) Culture

(2) Gender roles

What are the 5 Dimensions of Self-Disclosure

(1) Depth

(2) Breath

(3) Frequency

(4) Valence (positive/negative)

(5) Duration

F/T: research reveals that the duration of FtF interaction is less related to closeness in friendships that the frequency of interactions

False - the duration of FtF interaction is MORE strongly related to closeness in friendships than the frequency of interactions

What are the Risks of Self-Disclosure?

(1) Rejection

(2) Chance of obligating others

(3) Hurt to others

(4) Violation of another's privacy

What’s the link between Self-Disclosure and the Linking Hypothesis?

disclosure can lead to linking and liking leads to disclosure

however, too much disclosure or indiscriminate disclosure at an early period can lead to disliking

Computer screens act as the opposites of an...

Inhibitor —> not having FtF contact makes us feel braver and disclosure more

T/F: The lack of FtF (Face-to-Face) interaction in Computer Mediated context encourages Self Disclosure

True - ppl are often more open to self disclosure at the start of an online relationship

Online self disclosure is a ______________ context since it contains more information that FtF

hyper-personal

Main strategies for intensifying relationships

- increasing contact

- direct definitional bid

- acceptance of definitional bid

- personal appearance

- behavioral adaptation

Cognitive Valence Theory

Describes how people respond to increases in intimacy behavior

For Ex:

• Person A increases intimacy

• Person B perceived intimacy and experiences low, medium or high arousal

• Person B makes a cognitive appraisal based on their cognitive schemata)

Cognitive schemata

an evaluation of the increase in intimacy behavior based on multiple factors (ie cultural appropriateness, personal predisposition, etc)

If the cognitive schemata is positive, then there will be an reciprocity of intimacy and relational closeness

What are Lee's Love Styles?

(1) Physical love (Eros)

(2) Companionate love (Storge)

(3) Game Playing Love (Ludus)

(4) Possessive Love (Ludus)

(5) Unselfish Love (Agape)

(6) Practical Love (Pragma)

What is Eros Love?

Physical Love - people who want to be in an intimate, touching relationship

Storge Love

a form of companionate love - being deeply connected to someone

What is Ludus Love?

Game playing love - people who just enjoy the game of romance

Mania (hyperactivity) Love

Possessive love - overly dependent kind of love

What is Agape Love?

Unselfish love - love of humanity

What is Pragma love?

Practical love - look at the backgrounds, similarities of two people, and join them together

Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love /\

Commitment + Intimacy + Passion /\ (the foundation of the triangle; primary forms of love)

secondary types are based on the combination of these three things

Sterberg's Secondary Types of Love

(1) Nonliking

(2) Liking

(3) Infatuation

(4) Empty love

(5) romantic love

(6) companionate love

(7) fatuous love

(8) consummate love

Marston's & Hecht's Love Way

70% communicate by saying 'I love you'

What are the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

(1) Gifts: only feel loved if you buy them stuff

(2) Service: only feel loved if you serve them (dishes, laundry)

(3) Physical Touch: hand holding

(4) Affirmation: only feel loved if you compliment them

(5) Quality Time: only feel loved if you do things with them

Attachment Theory

The view that love is a process of becoming attached to someone, which includes forming a bond and becoming close

Attachment theorists take a _____________ approach to studying love

Developmental

Attachment Styles (Bartholomew)

(1) The Secure Style (Im okay, you're okay)

(2) The Preoccupied Style (Im not okay, you're okay)

(3) The Fearful style (Im not okay, you're not okay)

(4) The Dismissive style (Im okay, you're not okay)

Intimacy

special relational states that occur in close relationships - characterized by feelings of warmth, trust and deep friendship

T/F: Some argue that intimacy is not experienced through shared knowledge

False - intimacy IS experienced through shared knowledge (SD)

What are Some Qualities of Intimate Relationships?

(1) are unique

(2) contain depth

(3) exist overtime

(4) exchange very high levels of listening and understanding

(5) comfortable with silence

(6) takes repeated interactions

T/F: Feeling intimacy with others increases our mental and physical health

True

Nonverbal behaviors of intimacy

(1) Visual (eye contact)

(2) Spatial (sitting close, facing them)

(3) Touch

(4) Body Movement (smiling, open body posture)

(5) Vocalic (warmth)

(6) Chronemic Behaviors (spending time)

What is the primary way in which intimate feelings get expressed?

touch

T/F: Nonverbal Communication is the essence of Intimate Relationships

True

Types of verbal intimacy

- Self disclosure

- verbal responsiveness ('altercentric')

- relationship talk (about the relationship itself)

- relational language (the use of 'we')

Relational maintenance

you have to engage in behaviors that will help to 'maintain' it, you you go on 'cruise control '

What are the two main perspectives on relationship maintenance?

(1) Ppl must actively work to maintain the relationship (centrifugal)

(2) ppl in committed relationships stay together unless something pulls them apart (cruise control)

What do most scholars believe about relational maintenance?

That ppl in committed relationship do run on cruise control 'sometimes' however, periodic maintenance is necessary

strategic maintenance behaviors

behaviors that are intentionally designed to maintain the relationship

ie - apologizing, sending flowers, keeping in touch over the phone

Routine Maintenance Behaviors

They are less strategic and deliberate

For Ex:

• Sharing takes, expressing positivity, and love languages

T/F: Strategic behaviors are somewhat better predictors of relational satisfaction and commitment than routine behaviors

False - ROUTINE behaviors are BETTER predictors of relational satisfaction - indicates an actual desire

T/F: the same behavior can be strategic in some situations and routine in others

True - holding hands in a movie theater all the time, but intentionally do it after a fight to help make up

Due to higher education, professional careers, and immigration, the # of long distance relationships are...

increasing - between 20-40% of college students are in a LDR

T/F: some studies suggest that people in LDR's are less happy and 'in love' with their partner due to being separated

False - studies have reported that people in LDR's are MORE happy and 'in love' with their partners

T/F: Friends in LDR's report as much relational satisfaction as those that are not in long distance relationships

True

What Type of Communication is Common in LDR's?

Mediated Communication - we tend to be on our 'best behavior', helping and allowing for LDR's to last

People in LDR's _______ each other more and believe that they’re more likely to get married

idealize

Two main barriers to relational dissolution

(1) Internal psychological - commitment, obligation, investments, strong religious beliefs, etc.

(2) external structural - financial considerations, the legal process and social pressures

What are 3 Primary Variables of Marriages?

(1) Conventionality Marriage (traditional vs. nontraditional)

(2) Companionship Marriage (dependence vs. autonomy)

(3) Conflict Marriage (open disagreement)

Traditional Marriage

- conventional in their view of marriage

- value stability and certainly in role relationships

- strongly interdependent

- share companionship ('my other half')

- do NOT avoid conflict

Independent Marriages

- unconventional

- value autonomy and do not rely on each other

- they negotiate frequently - results in more conflict (not in a bad way)

T/F: both independents and traditional report having satisfying marriages

True

Separate Marriages

- conventional

- not interdependent (live separate lives)

- 'emotionally divorced'

- AVOID conflict - dont care enough

- not expressive and dont understand other's emotions well

What are the odds that an American couple will celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary?

50%

Nine signs that your marriage will last:

(1) you dated for a while (own place)

(2) you keep the 'mhms' to the minimum

(3) you really talk

(4) warm feet

(5) demographics

(6) carve our 'me time'

(7) mutual appreciation

(8) amplify your partners positivity

(9) ration of 5-1 positive feelings to neg