Certamen Mythology- Greek Idiots

People/gods/nymphs/other beings who pissed of the gods- self reflection from choosing this topic: I just described at least half out of every person in Greek mytholgy

Actaeon

What this guy did wrong is VERY varied (flirts with Semele, sees Artemis bathing (Callimachus, Pseudo-Apollodorus and Ovid’s version), boasts he is a better hunter than Artemis), but at the end in most stories, he gets eaten by his own hounds

Niobe

taunted and refused to worship Leto, says her having 14 kids is better than Leto’s two (Artemis and Apollo), in revenge the twins kill all of Niobe’s children, Niobe is so sad she cries herself to stone

Tantalus

Served the gods his son Pelops for dinner, gods realized that and sentenced Tantalus in the underworld to be stuck in a pool of water with delicious fruit hanging above, everytime he tries to eat or drink, the water and food move away

Agamemnon

Sooooo this guy pissed off Artemis AND Apollo, Artemis prevented him from sailing off to troy until he sacrificed his daugther Iphegenia; he pissed off Apollo by kidnapping on of his seer’s daugther as a brideprice and refusing to give her back, Apollo responds by raining arrows of disease and death

Prometheus

stole fire for humans, Zeus got pissed, strapped him to a rock and had an eagle eat his liver every day

Ixion

emurdered his father-in-law and could find no one to purify him until Zeus did so and admitted him as a guest to Olympus. Ixion tried to seduce Hera. Zeus substituted for her a cloud, by which Ixion became the father of Centaurus, who fathered the Centaurs by the mares of Mount Pelion. Zeus, to punish him, bound him on a fiery wheel, which rolled unceasingly through the air or, more commonly, in the underworld

Sisyphus

This guy cheats death twice

First he traps Thanatos, stopping everyone form dying, Ares starts the search for Thanatos, both Thanatos and Ares kill him, tells his wife to not bury him properly

In the underworld, gives Penelope the sob story of not being buried, Penelope lets im come back to life as a ghost temporarily to haunt his wife, but Sissyphus just stays up their until he dies of old age, goes down to the underworld and is forced to endlessly roll a boulder up a hill…. FUN

Cadmus

This guy is the founder of Thebes, killed a dragon, who was the son of Ares, eventually Ares turns him and his wife Harmonia into snakes

Basically every child and victim of Zeus

Hera….just Hera

Medusa

raped by Poseidon in Athena’s temple, Athena turned her into a Gorgon until Perseus killed her

Arachne

thought she was the best weaver, challenges Athena, saying she is better than Athena, weaving contest, Arachne weaves a tapestry insulting the gods, Athena starts hitting her for that, Arachne goes to suicide, Arachne turns her into a spider

Psyche

She pissed off Aphrodite for everyone else thinking she is hotter than Aphrodite AND then she got together with Eros, Aphrodite’s son

Odysseus

Pissed off Poseidon by kill the cyclops Ployphemus, his son; Poseidon made Ody’s journey home SUPER long

Erysichthon

cut down trees in Demeter’s sacred grove, Demeter put the spirit of hunger in him, no food could satisfy him, he eventually ate himself

Minos

Pissed off Poseidon, Poseidon helped him out by bringing out a really cool bull as a good omen under the condition minos would sacrifice the bull to Poseidon, but minos instead sacrified a lamer bull; in his wrath, he influenced Pasiphae, Minos’ wife to fall in love with a bull, resulting the minotaur

Midas

Pissed of Apollo, there was a music competition between Pan and Apollo, Apollo won but Minos though Pan should be the winner, Apollo turned Minos’ ears into ass ears (donkey ears people) in revenge

Echo

Pissed of Hera for distracting her while Zeus was going on with another affair, Hera forced her to forever only echo others

Marsyas

had a music competition with Apollo after bragging, when Apollo won, Apollo ummmm….. skinned him alive

Little Ajax

Ajax had raped Cassandra, Athena was furious at the treatment of her priestess. Despite this, Ajax managed to hide at the altar of a deity where the Greeks, fearing divine retribution should they kill him and destroy the altar, allowed him to live. When the Greeks left without killing Ajax, despite their sacrifices, Athena became so angry that she persuaded Zeus to send a storm that sank many of their ships.

As Ajax was returning from Troy, Athena hit his ship with a thunderbolt and the vessel was wrecked on the Whirling Rocks. But he escaped with some of his men, managing to cling onto a rock through the assistance of Poseidon. He would have been saved in spite of Athena, but he then audaciously declared that he would escape the dangers of the sea in defiance of the immortals. Offended, Poseidon split the rock with his trident and Ajax died.

Jason

Medea and Jason kill medea’s brother Absyrtus, Zeus gets pissed by famial murder and causes their voyage home to be a mess until circe purifies the two

Asclepius

Zeus feared Asclepius' healing abilities (bringing people from the dead) threatened the division between the gods and humanity, Zeus kills her with a thunderbolt

Theseus and Pirithuous

tried to abduct Persephone as a bride for Pirithuous, Hades is pissed, has them for “dinner“, but they get glued to their seats, eventually Hercules saves Theseus but Hades bans him from saving Pirithous as well