helping relationship

victor frankl -existentialism

Founder of Logotherapy (“therapy through meaning”).

• Core idea: The primary human drive is the search for meaning (not pleasure, as Freud said, or power, as Adler said).

• Even in suffering, people can find meaning and purpose.

• Famous book: Man’s Search for Meaning (based on his Holocaust concentration camp experiences).

logo therapy - victor frankl

A form of existential therapy focused on the search for meaning in life.

Yalom - existentialism

A leader in existential therapy.

• Focuses on the “givens” of existence — universal challenges everyone must face.

Death – awareness of mortality.

1. Freedom – responsibility for choices; no ultimate structure controlling us.

2. Isolation – we are ultimately alone, even in close relationships.

3. Meaninglessness – we must create meaning in a world that doesn’t provide it automatically.

Freud -

Founder of psychoanalysis.

• Focused on how unconscious motives, childhood experiences, and psychosexual development influence behavior.

Levels of Consciousness

• Conscious: Thoughts you are aware of.

• Preconscious: Memories you can bring to awareness.

• Unconscious: Drives, wishes, and memories outside awareness that influence behavior.

Freud

• Personality Structure

  • Id: Instinctual drives (pleasure principle).

  • Ego: Reality-based mediator (reality principle).

  • Superego: Moral standards, conscience.

Freud

• Psychosexual Stages

  • Oral (0–1 yr): Pleasure from mouth (feeding, sucking).

  • Anal (1–3 yrs): Bowel/bladder control, orderliness.

  • Phallic (3–6 yrs): Genital focus, Oedipus/Electra complex.

  • Latency (6–12 yrs): Dormant sexual energy, focus on social skills.

  • Genital (12+ yrs): Mature sexual intimacy and relationships.

• Defense Mechanisms

  • Repression, denial, projection, regression, sublimation, etc.

  • Ego protects the person from anxiety by using these.

Carl Rogers – Person-Centered Therapy  - Rogerian

• Founder of Client-Centered (Person-Centered) Therapy.

• Believed people are inherently good and have a natural tendency toward self-actualization if given the right environment.

Carl Roger

Core Concepts

1. Unconditional Positive Regard (UPR): Accepting the client without judgment.

2. Empathy: Deep understanding of the client’s feelings and perspective.

3. Congruence (Genuineness): Counselor is authentic and transparent.

4. Self-Concept: How people view themselves; problems arise when there’s incongruence between self-concept and experience.

Rogerian

Therapist Role

• Nondirective → the client leads the process.

• Counselor provides a safe, supportive environment with UPR, empathy, and congruence.

• Focus is on the here-and-now and the client’s subjective experience.

Phenomenological

• Definition: Focuses on the client’s subjective experience — how they perceive and interpret their world.

• Core idea: Reality is what the client experiences, not what the counselor thinks it is.

• Rooted in humanistic and existential theories (Rogers, May, Frankl).

• Subjective experience + here-and-now + understanding the client’s perspective.

MARGRET MAHLER

• Focused on infant development and the process of becoming a separate, individual self from the mother/caregiver.

• Emphasized the psychological birth of the child.

• Mahler = Separation-Individuation Theory → development of individuality in infants.

Berne

• Developed Transactional Analysis (TA) in the 1950s–60s.

• Focus: Understanding social interactions (“transactions”) and personality structures.

• Ego States

  • Parent: Behaviors, thoughts, and feelings copied from caregivers.

  • Adult: Rational, objective, problem-solving part.

  • Child: Feelings, behaviors, and attitudes from childhood (spontaneous or adapted).

• Transactions

  • Communication exchanges between people.

  • Can be complementary (smooth) or crossed (conflict).

• Strokes

  • Units of social recognition (positive or negative).

  • People need “strokes” for validation and psychological health.

• Life Scripts

  • Unconscious life plans formed in childhood.

  • Influence decisions, career, relationships, and behaviors.

Rollo May -existential-humanistic psychology.

• Emphasized anxiety, freedom, responsibility, and the search for meaning.

• Believed that psychological distress arises from struggles with existential concerns (like isolation, death, freedom, and meaninglessness).

Key Concepts

1. Existential Anxiety

   • Normal anxiety arises when facing freedom, responsibility, and life’s inherent uncertainties.

   • Unlike neurotic anxiety, it can be a catalyst for growth.

2. Freedom & Responsibility

   • Humans have freedom to make choices, but must take responsibility for the consequences.

3. Authenticity

   • Living in alignment with one’s true values and self, rather than societal expectations.

4. Love & Will

   • Emphasized the importance of relationships, creativity, and “will” as the driving force behind action and meaning.

Freud Test 

Rotter incomplete sentence test 

Client is given the beginning of a sentence and asked to complete it (e.g., “I feel…”, “My mother…”, “What makes me sad…”).

• Goal: Responses reveal themes about personality, conflicts, attitudes, and adjustment.

TAT Thematic Apperception Test (TAT)

• Client is shown a series of ambiguous pictures and asked to create a story.

• Goal: Reveal unconscious motives, needs, and conflicts by analyzing recurring themes in the stories.

ORAL STAGE - FREUD

• (0–1 year)

  • Pleasure: Mouth (sucking, eating, biting).

  • Task: Weaning.

  • Fixation: Smoking, overeating, nail-biting, dependency.

• Anal Stage

• (1–3 years)

• Pleasure: Bowel/bladder control.

• Task: Toilet training.

• Fixation: Anal-retentive (perfectionism, orderliness) OR anal-expulsive (messy, disorganized).

Phallic Stage

3–6 years)

• Pleasure: Genitals.

• Task: Resolving Oedipus complex (boys) / Electra complex (girls).

• Fixation: Guilt, sexual identity confusion.

Latency Stage (6–12 years)

• Sexual energy is dormant.

• Focus: Socialization, school, hobbies, friendships.

• Fixation: Issues with social/communication skills.

Genital Stage (

• 12+ years, adolescence–adulthood)

  Pleasure: Genitals again, but in mature sexual intimacy.

• Task: Establishing healthy adult relationships.

• Fixation: Difficulty forming healthy relationships.

• Eros

• Eros = the “life force” or “life drive.”

  1. Eros (life drive) → makes us want to live, love, grow, and create. It’s the part of you that wants to stay alive, eat food, make friends, fall in love, and build things.

• It’s like your inner energy for living and enjoying life.

• Thanatos (Death Instincts)

• Opposite force to Eros.

• Represents aggression, destructiveness, risky behavior, self-destructive urges.

• Thanatos = the “death force” or “death drive.”

• Freud said it’s the part of us that sometimes wants to destroy, fight, or give up.

• EX.

• It’s the part of you that makes you want to:

  • Smash your Lego tower instead of building it.

  • Yell when you’re angry.

  • Take risks that could be dangerous.

1. Free Association

• The client says whatever comes to mind without censorship.

• Goal: Bring unconscious thoughts, feelings, and conflicts to awareness.

• Therapist listens for patterns, slips, resistances, or themes.

• The idea: our unconscious mind leaks out in the words we say.

• By speaking freely, people reveal unresolved conflicts, wishes, or fears.

Example

Therapist: “Just say anything that pops into your head.”
Client: “Tree… green… childhood… scary dog… father…”
➡ The therapist might notice the link to father and explore it.

Dream Analysis (“The royal road to the unconscious”)

• Dreams reveal unconscious desires and conflicts.

• Freud broke them down into:

  • Manifest content → the actual storyline/events of the dream.

  • Latent content → hidden, symbolic meaning (the real unconscious material).

• Example: Dreaming of being chased → could represent repressed fear of confrontation.

• Catharsis

• = an emotional release.

• In Freud’s psychoanalytic theory, it refers to the release of repressed emotions when unconscious material comes into awareness.

• The idea is that expressing the emotion relieves inner tension and reduces psychological distress.

ex- Watching a sad movie and crying in a way that makes you “feel better” afterward.

• Insight =

• the client’s awareness and understanding of unconscious motivations, conflicts, or patterns that influence their behavior.

• In psychoanalysis, the therapist helps the client connect past experiences → present behavior.

anna O

was the pseudonym for Bertha Pappenheim, a patient of Sigmund Freud's colleague Josef Breuer, whose case was detailed in the influential book Studies on Hysteria and was pivotal in the development of psychoanalysis through the concept of the "talking cure".

Carl Jung – Collective Unconscious

• Definition: Part of the unconscious mind that is shared by all humans, containing universal memories, experiences, and archetypes.

• Unlike Freud’s personal unconscious (unique to the individual), Jung’s collective unconscious is inherited and universal.

Collective unconscious = a shared mind-library of human memories and symbols that we’re all born with.

carl jung

1. Archetypes: Universal symbols/images in the collective unconscious

   • Examples: The Hero, The Mother, The Shadow, The Self

2. Persona: The “mask” we show to the world

3. Shadow: The hidden or suppressed parts of personality

4. Anima/Animus: The feminine side of men / masculine side of women

Carl Jung –

Basics

• Field: Analytical Psychology (Neo-Freudian / Psychodynamic)

• Key Focus: Personality development, unconscious mind, and individuation

MBTI

• Full Name: Myers-Briggs Type Indicator

• Based On: Jung’s psychological types (introversion vs. extraversion, thinking vs. feeling, sensing vs. intuiting)

• Purpose: Assess personality preferences and how people perceive the world and make decisions

Adler

• Field: Individual Psychology (Neo-Freudian / Psychodynamic)

• Key Focus: Social interest, striving for superiority, and holistic understanding of personality

Adler

Core Concepts

1. Striving for Superiority

   • People are motivated to overcome feelings of inferiority and achieve personal growth.

2. Inferiority Complex

   • Feeling inadequate or powerless can hinder development if overcompensated.

3. Social Interest

   • Healthy people are motivated by connection, cooperation, and contribution to society.

4. Lifestyle

   • Unique pattern of behaviors, thoughts, and feelings developed in childhood experiences.

   • Influences career, relationships, and coping strategies.

5. Birth Order Influence

   • Adler believed birth order can shape personality traits (e.g., first-born, middle,

Neo-Freudian

The believed in everything but the sex stuff;

modified Freud → focus on social, cultural, and interpersonal influences rather than just sexual/biological drives.

Integrative

I have one mode of therapy I already use like my go to is CBT but I may have to add some person centered therapy for this particular client,

A collective 

is i dont have  a set modality that i use; i dont have my own therapy at all; I use a little bit of everything; 

Lazarus

s a major figure in multimodal therapy and behavioral counseling,

he treats you on how you present- he is considered a collective;

BASIC ID

B- BEHAVIOR A-AFFECT S-SENSATION I-IMAGERY- C- CONGITIVE- I- INTERPESONAL D- DRUG/PHYSICAL SYMPTOMS

aaron beck CBT

STINKING THINKING-

SOCRATIC THINKING

BECK DID NOT BELIEVE THAT DEPRESSION WAS REAL; HE SAID IT WAS THE WAY YOU THIBK; SO HE WOULD ASK SOCRATIC QUESTION LIKE HOW DO YOU KNOW ETC?

• Focus: Connection between thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Changing dysfunctional thoughts leads to behavior and emotional change.

• Type: Structured, goal-oriented, time-limited therapy

Aaron Beck -CBT

Core Principles

1. Cognition affects behavior and emotion

   • Dysfunctional thoughts → negative emotions → maladaptive behaviors

2. Identify and challenge cognitive distortions

   • Examples: all-or-nothing thinking, overgeneralization, catastrophizing

3. Behavioral techniques

   • Exposure, role-play, skills training, homework assignments

4. Collaborative approach

   • Client and counselor work together to set goals and monitor progress

CBT basic

if I change the way i think > i can change the way i feel > then i can change my behavior

Pavlov 

classical conditioning 

• Unconditioned Stimulus (US) → naturally produces a response

• Unconditioned Response (UR) → natural response to the US

• Neutral Stimulus (NS) → initially does not trigger the response

• Pairing NS + US repeatedly → association is formed

• Neutral Stimulus becomes Conditioned Stimulus (CS) → now triggers the response on its own

• Conditioned Response (CR) → learned response to the CS

Example in order:

1. Food (US) → Salivation (UR)

2. Bell (NS) → No salivation

3. Pair Bell + Food multiple times

4. Bell (now CS) → Salivation (CR)

skinner

Operant Conditioning – Step by Step

1. Behavior occurs → the action the person or animal performs

2. Consequence follows → something happens after the behavior (reinforcement or punishment)

3. Type of consequence determines future behavior:

   • Positive Reinforcement: Add something pleasant → behavior increases

   • Negative Reinforcement: Remove something unpleasant → behavior increases

   • Positive Punishment: Add something unpleasant → behavior decreases

   • Negative Punishment: Remove something pleasant → behavior decreases

4. Behavior is strengthened or weakened based on the consequence

5. Reinforcement schedules can affect how quickly and strongly behavior is learned:

   • Fixed/variable ratio, fixed/variable interval

Example in order:

1. Child cleans room (Behavior)

2. Parent gives praise (Positive Reinforcement)

3. Child is more likely to clean room again (Behavior strengthened)

Edward Thorndike – Basics

similar theory to skinner - operant conditioning

law of effect if i want to change behavior i need to reward or consequence the behavior as close to it happening

if you want to change my behavior it needs to happen as soon as the behavior happened

ex. if I got in trouble at school and mom said wait until dad gets home it takes away from me learrning to not misbehave because i was not punsished immediaitly

Wolpe

1. Systematic Desensitization

   • A behavioral technique to reduce phobias or anxiety.- gradually

   • Based on classical conditioning:

     • You can replace an anxious response with a relaxation response.

   • Steps:

     1. Relaxation training – teach deep muscle relaxation or breathing.

     2. Fear hierarchy – list situations causing anxiety from least to most stressful.

     3. Gradual exposure – slowly pair anxiety-provoking situations with relaxation.

2. Reciprocal Inhibition

   • Core principle: You can’t be anxious and relaxed at the same time.

   • Systematic desensitization relies on this.

Flooding

• A behavioral therapy technique used to treat phobias and anxiety disorders.

• Based on classical conditioning principles.

• Involves exposing a client directly and intensely to the feared stimulus without gradual buildup.

all at the same time- kid knows how to swim but scared to get into the water- i push them in to get over that fear

Implosive Therapy

• Similar to flooding, but uses imagined or symbolic exposure rather than actual direct exposure.

How It Works

1. The client is asked to imagine the feared situation in vivid detail.

2. The therapist may amplify anxiety by highlighting catastrophic thoughts (called “flooding the imagination”).

3. Through repeated imaginal exposure, the fear response eventually extinguishes.

4. Often includes relaxation or coping strategies.

5. 3. Key Points

• Focuses on imagination rather than real-life exposure.

• Can be less physically stressful than full flooding.

• Often combined with systematic desensitization techniques.

REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy): albert ellis

• Founder: Albert Ellis

• Core Idea: It’s not what happens to you that causes distress, it’s your beliefs about it.

• ABC Model:

  • A – Activating Event → something happens

  • B – Beliefs → rational or irrational thoughts about it

  • C – Consequences → feelings/behaviors that result

• Irrational Beliefs: “I must be perfect,” “Everyone must like me,” “Life must be easy”

• Goal of Therapy: Identify, challenge, and replace irrational beliefs with rational ones

Glasser 

• William Glasser (1925–2013)

• Psychiatrist, founder of Reality Therapy and developer of Choice Theory.

• Focused on personal responsibility, present choices, and meeting needs rather than dwelling on the past.

Glasser

2. Reality Therapy

• Developed in the 1960s.

• Goal: Help clients make better choices to meet their needs effectively.

• Focuses on the present (“What are you doing now?”) rather than past trauma.

• Avoids the medical model of labeling mental illness.

Core Principles

• People have five basic needs:

  1. Survival (physical needs, health, safety)

  2. Love and belonging (relationships, community)

  3. Power/achievement (competence, success)

  4. Freedom (independence, autonomy)

  5. Fun (enjoyment, play, creativity)

• Mental distress occurs when these needs are not being met effectively.

• Therapy focuses on responsibility and better choices.

Glasser

3. Choice Theory

• Glasser’s updated framework (1990s).

• Says all behavior is chosen and represents our best attempt to meet our needs.

• We can only control our own behavior, not others.

• Emphasis on internal control rather than blaming external factors.

Gestalt and Fritz Perls

• Fritz Perls (1893–1970): Founder of Gestalt Therapy (with Laura Perls).

• Gestalt = “whole” or “form” → focus on the whole person and their present experience.

Gestalt 

1. Here and Now

   • Focus on what’s happening right now, not the past.

   • Clients fully feel and experience their emotions in the moment.

2. Awareness & Wholeness

   • Goal: make all parts of yourself fit together (thoughts, feelings, actions).

   • Old unresolved feelings from the past (“unfinished business”) show up in the present.

3. Figure-Ground

   • Like a picture: some things stand out (figure), others are background (ground).

   • Therapy helps bring important issues into focus.

4. Unfinished Business

   • Past emotions like anger, guilt, or resentment that aren’t resolved.

   • These emotions affect your life now until they’re dealt with.

Gestalt

Techniques

• Empty Chair Technique

  • Client role-plays a conversation with a person (or part of self) by speaking to an empty chair.

• Role Play / Dialogue

  • Different aspects of the self act out feelings to gain awareness.

• Exaggeration

  • Client exaggerates a gesture, movement, or tone to increase awareness of hidden emotions.

• Experiments

  • In-session exercises designed to raise awareness and insight.

Stephen Karpman (1968). Drama Triangle

The Three Roles

1. Victim

   • Feels oppressed, helpless, powerless.

   • Looks for a Rescuer to save them or a Persecutor to blame.

   • Key belief: “Poor me.”

2. Rescuer

   • Tries to help, save, or fix the Victim.

   • Often neglects their own needs.

   • Key belief: “Let me help you.”

3. Persecutor

   • Blames, criticizes, or dominates others.

   • Maintains control through aggression, rigidity, or judgment.

   • Key belief: “It’s all your fault.”

Karpman

NCE Connection

• The drama triangle highlights maladaptive relationship patterns.

• Important in counseling for recognizing codependency, family dynamics, and boundary issues.

• A counselor might help clients step out of the triangle by:

  • Encouraging personal responsibility (instead of Victimhood).

  • Supporting empowerment (instead of Rescuing).

  • Promoting healthy assertiveness (instead of Persecuting).

✅ Quick NCE Memory Hook:
Karpman Triangle = Victim, Rescuer, Persecutor → dysfunctional cycle.

TA-Script analysis

• A life plan or unconscious pattern of behavior formed in childhood.

• Created based on messages (spoken or unspoken) from parents and authority figures.

• Scripts guide how a person believes life will unfold (e.g., success, failure, struggle).

• These often limit freedom and repeat unhealthy patterns.

---

3. Types of Scripts

• Winner’s Script: Leads to accomplishment and satisfaction.

• Loser’s Script: Leads to failure or self-sabotage.

• Non-winner’s Script: Mediocre or “stuck” outcomes, without real fulfillment.

Primary Prevention

• Goal: Stop problems before they occur.

• Focus: Promoting mental health & wellness, reducing risk factors.

• Examples:

  • School guidance programs teaching coping skills.

  • Community workshops on stress management.

  • Anti-drug education campaigns.

Secondary

?

• Goal: Early detection & intervention to reduce severity/duration of problems.

• Focus: Identifying issues quickly and addressing them before they get worse.

• Examples:

  • Screening for depression or anxiety.

  • Crisis hotlines.

  • Short-term counseling after a traumatic event.

Tertiary Prevention

Goal: Reduce long-term impact of established problems.

• Focus: Rehabilitation, relapse prevention, improving quality of life.

• Examples:

  • Ongoing therapy for someone with chronic mental illness.

  • Support groups (AA, NA).

  • Vocational rehab for those recovering from psychiatric hospitalization.

Transtheoretical Model of Change (TTM)

1. Precontemplation – Not thinking about change
   👉 “I don’t need to change.”

2. Contemplation – Thinking about change
   👉 “Maybe I should change.”

3. Preparation – Getting ready
   👉 “I’ll start soon.”

4. Action – Making the change
   👉 “I’m doing it now.”

5. Maintenance – Keeping it going
   👉 “I’ve been doing this for a while.”

6. (Sometimes) Termination – Change is permanent
   👉 “I’ll never go back.”

💡 Key idea: Change doesn’t happen overnight. People move step by step through these stages, sometimes slipping back, until the change sticks.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (1926–2004)

The Five Stages of Grief

1. Denial

   • Shock or disbelief.

   • “This can’t be happening.”

2. Anger

   • Frustration, resentment, or blame.

   • “Why me? This isn’t fair.”

3. Bargaining

   • Attempting to negotiate or change fate.

   • “If I do this, maybe things will be okay.”

4. Depression

   • Sadness, hopelessness, withdrawal.

   • “I can’t go on.”

5. Acceptance

   • Coming to terms with the loss.

   • “It’s going to be okay.”

paradoxical technique

• The counselor encourages the client to do (or exaggerate) the very behavior they want to stop.

• The “paradox” is that by prescribing the symptom, the client often becomes more aware, resists it, or sees it differently — which reduces it.

🧠 Why it works

• Takes away the struggle/power of the symptom.

• Brings hidden behaviors or thoughts into the open.

• Helps the client see they actually have control.

✅ Examples

• Insomnia: Therapist says, “Tonight, I want you to try and stay awake as long as you can.” → The pressure to sleep is gone, and sleep often comes more easily.