Each of us is born with a drive to seek, form, maintain, and protect strong relationships
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Commitment
Our desire to stay in a relationship no matter what happens
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Emotional Commitment
A sense of responsibility for each other's feelings and emotional well-being
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Social Commitment
Motivates us to spend time together
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Interdependence
What happens to one person affects everyone else in the relationship
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Investment
The commitment of one's energies and other resources to those relationships
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Dialectical Tensions
Conflicts between two important but opposing needs or desires
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Autonomy
The feeling of wanting to be one's own person
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Connection
The desire to be close to others
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Openness
The desire for disclosure and honesty
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Closedness
The desire to keep certain facts, thoughts, or ideas to oneself
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Predictability
The desire for consistency and stability
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Novelty
The desire for fresh, new experiences
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Interpersonal Attraction
Any force that draws people together
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Physical Attraction
Being drawn to someone because of his or her looks
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Social Attraction
Being attracted to someone's personality
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Task Attraction
Being attracted to someone's abilities and dependability
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Uncertainty Reduction Theory
You will find uncertainty to be unpleasant, so you'll be motivated to reduce your uncertainty by using communication behaviors to get to know them
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Predicted Outcome Value Theory
When we first communicate with others, we try to determine whether continued communication with them will be worth our effort
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Approach Behaviors
Communication behaviors that signal interest in another person
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Avoidance Behaviors
Communication behaviors that signal a lack of interest in someone else
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Social Exchange Theory
People seek to maintain relationships in which their benefits outweigh their costs
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Comparison Level
Your realistic expectation of what you want and think you deserve from a relationship
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Comparison Level for Alternatives
Your assessment of how good or bad your current relationship is compared with your perceived options
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Equity Theory
Borrows the concepts of cost and reward from social exchange theory and extends them by defining a good relationship as one in which your ratio of costs and rewards is equal to your partner's
A person's willingness to talk with his or her friend or relational partner about their relationship
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Assurances
Verbal and nonverbal behaviors that people use to illustrate their faithfulness and commitment to others
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Positivity
Makes others feel comfortable around us
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Sharing Tasks
Performing one's fair share of the work in a relationship
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Initiating Stage
When people meet and interact for the first timeE
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Experimenting Stage
You have conversations to learn more about that person
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Intensifying Stage
People move from being acquaintances to being friends
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Integrating Stage
A deep commitment has formed, and people share a strong sense that the relationship has its own identity
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Bonding Stage
Partners make a public announcement of their commitment to each other
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Differentiating Stage
Begin to see their differences as undesirable or annoying
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Circumscribing Stage
Begin to decrease the quality and quantity of their communication with each other
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Stagnating Stage
The relationship stops growing and people feel as if they are just "going through the motions"
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Avoiding Stage
Create physical and emotional distance between each other
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Ghosting
When someone you have been seeing suddenly and unexpectedly stops all contact with you on social media
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Orbiting
Someone who has ghosted you continues to interact with you on social media, such as by watching your stories or liking your posts
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Terminating Stage
The relationship is officially judged to be over
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Divorce
The legal discontinuation of the marriage
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Relational Repair
Comprising their efforts to fix problems in their relationship so that the relationship can continue
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Relational Transgression
Any behavior that violates an important expectation in the relationship
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Investment Model of Commitment Processes
Commitment to a relationship is a function of three factors - We are more committed to a relationship if we feel more satisfied in it - If we receive resources from it - If we believe our alternatives to being in that relationship are undesirable
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Apologies
- Admission of responsibility - Expression of regret - Commitment not to repeat the offense - A request for forgiveness
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Explanations
Accounts of why an offending behavior occurred
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Denials
Instead of explaining or apologizing for our behavior, we calim we have done nothing wrong
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Appeasements
Forms of compensation that we offer someone to make up for a transgression
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Avoidance
Making a conscious effort to ignore the transgression and to prevent discussion about it
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Forgiveness
The process by which a wronged person stops feeling angry or resentful about an offense
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Arranged Marriage
One's parents select a romantic partner for him or her
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Polygamy
A person can have more than one spouse at a time
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Creeping
Checking out someone's information on Facebook or a similar site without the person's knowledge
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Catfishing
Using false information, including stolen or edited photos, to create a fake online persona
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Parasocial Relationship
One-sided friendship with someone who isn't aware of your existence
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Platonic Relationship
A relationship that is nonromantic and nonsexual
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Friends-with-Benefits (FWB) Relationships
Friends engage in sexual activity with each other, even though they don't consider their relationship to be romantic
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True Friends
Consider themselves to be close friends who share sexual activity
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Just Sex Partners
Interact almost exclusively for the purpose of sexual interaction
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Network Opportunists
Casual friends who engage in sexual activity if neither finds a more desirable partner
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Successful Transition Pairs
Friends with benefits who eventually form a romantic relationship with each other
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Unintentional Transition Pairs
Friends with benefits who end up falling in love with each other, even though that wasn't their intention
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Failed Transition Pairs
Friends with benefits who tried unsuccessfully to become romantic partners
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Transition Out Pairs
Former romantic partners who now have a FWB relationship
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Peer
Someone similar in power or status to oneself
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Monogamy
Being in only one romantic relationship at a time and avoiding romantic or sexual involvement with people outside the relationship
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Infidelity
Having romantic or sexual interaction with someone outside of one's romantic relationship
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Polygamy
One person is married to two or more spouses at the same time
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Polyamory
Having more than one consensual romantic or sexual relationship at once
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Spousal Privilege
Communication between spouses is privileged and protected
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Visitation
Marriage gives spouses rights of visitation if one spouse is hospitalized or imprisoned
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Stepchildren
Stepparents have legal status with stepchildren only if they are legally married to the children's parentC
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Cohabitation on Controlled Properties
Marriage allows spouses to live together on military bases and other controlled properties
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Inheritance and Property Rights
Unless a person's will specifies otherwise, a spouse is entitled to receive a person's estate when he or she passes away
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Medical and Burial Decisions
Spouses have the ability to make medical decisions for each other and to make burial or cremation decisions when one of them dies
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Domestic Violence Protection
If one spouse is abusive or violent, the other spouse can request domestic violence protection orders from a court
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Marital Schemata
Represent cognitive models for what marriage is and should be
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Traditional Couples
Take a culturally conventional approach to marriage. - Wives should be in the kitchen, housewives - Husbands are responsible for home repair and auto maintenance Conflict: Engage in it rather than avoid it
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Separate Couples
Spouses are autonomous rather than interdependent - Have their own interests and social networks, and they think of themselves as separate individuals rather than as one couple Conflict: Don't engage in conflict
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Independent Couples
See themselves as being independent of social expectations for marriage - Don't necessarily believe in conventional gender roles or divisions of labor, so the wife might support the family financially while the husband stays home with the children Conflict: Engage in conflict when it arises
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Validating Couples
Talk about their disagreements openly and cooperatively
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Volatile Couples
Talks about disagreements openly, but in a way that is competitive rather than cooperative
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Conflict-Avoiding Couples
Deal with disagreements indirectly rather than openly
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Hostile Couples
Experience frequent and intense conflict
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Communication Privacy Management (CPM) Theory
Explains how individuals and couples manage tensions between disclosing certain information and keeping it private
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Family of Origin
Family one grows up in, so it typically consists of one's parents or stepparents and siblings
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Family of Procreation
The family one starts as an adult, and it consists of a spouse or romantic partner and/or any children raised as one's own
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Blamer
Holds others responsible for whatever goes wrong but accepts no responsibility for his or her own behaviors
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Placater
Peacemaker who will go to any lengths to reduce conflict
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Computer
Attempts to use logic and reason -rather than emotion- to defuse the situation
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Distracter
Makes random, irrelevant comments so that the rest of the family will forget about the conflict
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Rituals
Repetitive behaviors that have special meaning
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Sexual Harassment
Unsolicited, unwelcome behavior of a sexual nature
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Quid Pro Quo
A supervisor offers an employee rewards in exchange for sexual favors
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Hostile Work Environment
Work conditions are sexually offensive or intimidating
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Workplace Bullying
Occurs when a superior engages repeatedly in aggressive and anti-social behavior directed at a subordinate
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Interpersonal Conflict
An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from the other party in achieving their goals