Types of Love

Storge

spontaneous feeling of affection or delight towards someone or something

Storge Level 1

feeling of affection, giving something desired, making the recipient feel good

Storge Level 2

\- feeling of affection that does not require them to sacrifice their ego

Storge Level 3

they feel responsible for others

Storge Level 4

feelings of affection and delight, but in a more satisfying way. Makes us aware that God wants what’s best for us, so each experience of storge is a gift from God

Philia

friendship

Philia Level 1

– “friendships of pleasure” or “friendships of utility” a self-focused friendship

Philia Level 2

“intellectual friendships” (friendships with another because it elevates you)

3 main problems with level 2 friendship

1. use of friends to satisfy ego
2. no true commitments
3. don’t last long

philia level 3

“we find joy in what is lovable”, seeking to do good for the other for the sake of another. recognizes intrinsic worth, dignity and goodness. requires a level of commitment

Philia Level 4

the ability have friendships is strengthened, because while you do have expectations for one another, you don’t expect the other person to be God, leaving room for understanding and forgiveness. Help each other grow closer to God, best interests at heart.

Eros

– romantic love, characterized by deep intimacy

Eros Level 1

physical attraction, just feelings, Level 1 lover will try to control their partners, objectification

Eros Level 2

self-centered romantic love, wanting to be loved but not returning it/ wanting to gain something from the relationship other than love

Eros Level 3

intimate gift of one person to another, considering needs and future of the other person, *exclusive*

Eros Level 4

vocation to be married, recognizing that God loves your spouse even more than you do, leading to a strong sense of humility

Agape

– selfless love, humble and gentle heart

Agape Level 1

DNE

Agape Level 2

DNE

Agape Level 3

meaning of life

Agape Level 4

perfect Agape is God, perfect patience, kindness, forgiveness, empathy, concern, compassion, gentleness and humility. Requires a great deal of sacrifice and work

5 powers of agape not found in other types

1) allows us to love all humans without exception, 2) requires sacrifice without expectation, 3) love and forgive an enemies who hate us despite having no storge, 4) love and care for the poor without expecting reciprocation (philia), 5) love and compassion for a dying man even though we have no eros

five steps that make moving from level 3 to level 4 easier

Recognizing 1) my life has dignity, 2) every human life is infinitely precious and lovable to God, 3) I cannot perfectly fullfil all the desires of every human being, 4) the only person who can fill all desires is God, 5) I’ll try to help others find God, and move aside and allow God to become the center of their lives