Marnie

First line

Here’s the deal: Stevie was getting hold of yet another bird behind my back and it’s all come out in the wash.

Here’s the deal: Stevie was getting hold of yet another bird behind my back and it’s all come out in the wash.

In my absence they’ve got together and in a bid to make her jealous, he’s told her I desperately want him back.

In my absence they’ve got together and in a bid to make her jealous, he’s told her I desperately want him back.

And that’s why I ring him all the time.

And that’s why I ring him all the time.

Which ain’t true.

Which ain’t true.

It’s him begging me to come back.

It’s him begging me to come back.

I only really ring him because I’m bored and I want an argument.

I only really ring him because I’m bored and I want an argument.

So there’s a set to between me and this divvy bird of his.

So there’s a set to between me and this divvy bird of his.

We’re back and forth on the phones, Stevie claiming to love me, me texting him to fuck off.

We’re back and forth on the phones, Stevie claiming to love me, me texting him to fuck off.

He goes back to her and says - whatever it is he says to her - which leads to verbals between the pair of us and a torrent of abuse.

He goes back to her and says - whatever it is he says to her - which leads to verbals between the pair of us and a torrent of abuse.

But I mean, it’s standard two way abuse - we’re giving as good as we get.

But I mean, it’s standard two way abuse - we’re giving as good as we get.

Next thing, she’s on the phone, screaming that he’s her boyfriend.

Next thing, she’s on the phone, screaming that he’s her boyfriend.

Saying all this really out of order stuff, you know, dragging my kid into the mix.

Saying all this really out of order stuff, you know, dragging my kid into the mix.

I assume, as you do, that the gloves are off.

I assume, as you do, that the gloves are off.

I text her - I just can’t take nothing you say for serious because you look like a fucking geezer and you’re so thick that you don’t even clock Stevie rings me as soon as you leave his flat.

I text her - I just can’t take nothing you say for serious because you look like a fucking geezer and you’re so thick that you don’t even clock Stevie rings me as soon as you leave his flat.

So we’re in the middle of one of our to do’s and she tells me that if I ever go to Selco’s I’m gonna get beat up.

So we’re in the middle of one of our to do’s and she tells me that if I ever go to Selco’s I’m gonna get beat up.

I get to thinking about that, it’s a liberty that really. I can go where I want.

I get to thinking about that, it’s a liberty that really. I can go where I want

So I do a bit of CSI work, you know, try and work out which Selco’s I can’t go to.

So I do a bit of CSI work, you know, try and work out which Selco’s I can’t go to.

Her facebook’s a touch misleading, I wasted time ringing Wimbledon, Croydon, Catford and Charlton, all to no avail.

Her facebook’s a touch misleading, I wasted time ringing Wimbledon, Croydon, Catford and Charlton, all to no avail.

But it turns out she works in Walthamstow.

But it turns out she works in Walthamstow.

True to my word, I train it up there, call her bluff.

True to my word, I train it up there, call her bluff.

But her managers waiting for me when I get there and he rings the Old Bill. Proper set up.