Mediation Exam 1

Read the…

Contract

If you don’t understand the contract, what two steps should you do?

1. read it again

2. ask your professor, accountant or attorney

examples of core values

faith, family, focus, friends, future, fame, fortune, flag

mediation law 1- are all facts friendly? Explain

yes because a mediator is an unbiased third party. after you find out the facts, you can determine if they’re friendly

mediator rule 2- if it’s not in writing, does it exist? Explain

No, it doesn’t exist in the court of law. video evidence isn’t admissible in court because it’s not in writing

definition of litigation

going to court or presenting your problem to a higher authority

can litigation be appealed?

yes

is litigation voluntary?

no

definition of arbitration

a binding legal decision that is formed outside of court

is arbitration voluntary?

no

can you appeal a litigation?

no

definition of mediation

neutral court-ordered party to facilitate argument

how is mediation different from litigation and arbitration?

1. disputants are the ones making the final decisions, not a higher power (judge, jury, arbitrator)

2. mediation is voluntary

restorative justice

focuses on healing and repairing harm

diplomacy

formal negotiations between states

reconciliation definition

truth telling and healing (all conflict resolution environments)

what is key to mediation?

forgiveness

justice in what form is most effective?

action

definition of justice:

giving everyone what they’re due/entitled to

definition of injustice

denying what due or entitled to someone

characteristics of a job

money-centric, short term, value is determined by a higher power (boss setting the salary)

characteristics of a career

long term, passion driven, a culmination of experiences and skills gained

what are common in relational and marital mediation?

power plays

character trait definition

how a person behaves in a mediation

what does a character trait drive?

someone’s behavior

are character traits typically visible in their demonstration?

yes

core value definition and drive

based on shared values and are internal. they drive someone’s decisions

are core values typically visible?

no

why is it important for a mediator to know the difference between a core value and a character trait?

being able to bring up more resolutions by understanding each other’s core values and how they align

what should you never do in a mediation?

go in blind. know as much about the topic as possible

relying on what during defense is never effective?

the past

everyone likes to …. during a mediation to keep the peace

tell their story

what percent of organizations lack formal conflict training

72

what percent of managers lack conflict management training

60

what percent of managers fail to perform conflict resolution?

50

is it possible to resolve a disagreement or argument with an everybody wins outcome?

sometimes

what are the 7 Rs of igniting disputes?

recalls, replays, regrets, recruits, resents, revenge, repeat

which stage of the 7 Rs are mediators typically called in

the revenge stage

recalls stage definition

remembers the incident emotionally and negative feelings begin to emerge

Replays stage definition

dwells on the negative feelings and causes worrisome days and sleepless nights

Regrets stage definition

regrets dealing with the other party and creates feelings of self-guilt and self-blame

recruits stage defintion

gathers a group of supporters who agree with only their side of the story

resents stage definition

lets negative emotions replace rational thinking

revenge stage definition

attacking the person, not the problem! wanting to get back at people

Repeats stage definition

percolating until the argument boils over into a dispute

dispute ignition

the moment rising tensions spark a disagreement, fueling an unresolved argument and igniting a dispute

what are arguments defined by?

defined by how we handle them

conflicting behaviors illustrate what?

illustrate what happens when negative emotions pull people away from clarity and connectioni

examples of conflicting behaviors

reacting emotionally, protecting positions, assuming the worst, attacking the person, letting ego rule, not forgiving

cooperating behaviors

what it looks like to stay grounded even when the conversation gets uncomfortable

examples of cooperative behaviors

asking questions, listening with curiosity, focusing on solutions, setting respectful boundaries, choosing empathy over defensiveness, forgiveness

true or false: turning arguments into friendly handshakes is not about a set of skills; it’s about a way of life

neither, it’s about both

what causes an argument to turn into a dispute?

when the problem becomes personal through unchecked emotions

what does CLEARR stand for

calm, listen, explore, align, respect, restore

which CLEARR steps are considered the red zone

calm and listen

which CLEARR steps are considered the yellow zone

explore and align

which CLEARR steps are considered the red zone

calm and listen

what zone does resolution take place?

green

Calm CLEARR definition and goal

stay quiet and seek to understand

Listen CLEARR definition

listen without interrupting

CLEARR goal of listen

continue to seek understanding and ways to collaborate

CLEARR definition Explore

explore and evaluate proposed ideas, approaches, solutions and goals

CLEARR goal explore

find common ground for a “win win” approach and outcome

CLEARR definition Align

align common goals and purposes

CLEARR goal align

agree on solutions and approaches that will achieve everyone’s common goal. aim for mutually shared values, priorities and achievements

CLEARR definition respect

respect the other party’s opinions and approaches

CLEARR goal respect

respect the process, outcome and other party

CLEARR definition and goal restore

restore the relationship and reconcile any differences by creating positive, encouraging emotional space

disagreement def

mild friction

argument def

heated exchange

dispute def

full blown relational strain

what determines how difficult it is to resolve an argument?

emotional intensity

disagreements are about…

understanding

arguments are about..

the moment

disputes are about..

consequences

is staying calm a weakness?

no. it allows for better control

true or false, good listening means agreeing

false

when you’re in the explore stage, you shift from assuming the worst to…

understanding the opportunity

which CLEARR step is the turning point to achieving a successful outcome?

align

what is the “cure”

restoration and reconciliation

who said “without forgivenss, there can be no reconciliation?

archbishop desmond tutu