CMN 120V Midterm #1

Self-description

info about self that is obvious to others (low-risk information)

Self-disclosure

any statement that reveals private, previously unknown info to another (intentional and high-risk) WE HAVE TO DISCLOSE INFO OURSELVES

Breadth

number of topics we are willing to disclose

Depth

level of intimacy (e.g., little depth: fav color and more depth: cancer diagnosis)

Evaluative

reveals a judgement (feelings/emotions)

Descriptive

facts

Functions of self-disclosure

1. relational escalation (relationship development)

2. catharsis (makes us feel better)

3. seek clarification (reveal help from others)

4. self-awareness (learn about ourselves, what we are willing to share)

Targets of Self-Disclosure

friends, family/parents, strangers; most with strangers and friends and least with acquaintances.

Social Penetration Theory (SPT)

explains how partners move from superficial levels to greater intimacy

Orientation Stage (SPT)

only share trivial info (where you're from, age, occupation, etc.)

Exploratory Affective Exchange stage (SPT)

reveal a bit more but nothing too risky (testing the waters)

Affective Exchange Stage (SPT)

frequently self-disclosing, a little more risky

Stable Exchange Stage (SPT)

deepest level. all topics are safe because they already know everything. these relationships stand the test of time.

Guttman Progression

as we move through each stage, breadth and depth should increase. all previous levels of breadth and depth are acceptable in LATER levels.

Development Trajectories and Satisfaction (study)

-surveyed people who has just broken up on the following:

- cognitive (thought): when did you first have these thoughts of spending your life together

- affective (feeling): when did these feelings of emotional connection first occur

- behavior (action): when did you first say "I love you" or go on vacation together longer than 3 days

**study found that people did the action (ex: saying "I love you") before actually thinking about their feelings on the relationship

Differences between friendship and love

1. less complex feelings

2. less strict standards and obligations

3. lack of overt expressions of positive emotion

**easier to dissolve friendship than romantic relationship

Similarities between friendship and love

1. respect

2. trust

3. responsiveness

4. capitalization (enhance our joy)

5. social support (emotional, informational, instrumental)

Prosocial Maintenance Behaviors

Positive behaviors, used over the course of a relationship, that promote closeness, trust, and liking

Antisocial Maintenance Behaviors

avoidance, no flirting, talk about others, jealousy induction, spying, infidelity, allowing control, destructive conflict

strategic maintenance behaviors

- intentionally designed to maintain a relationship

- doing something special for your partner on his/her birthday

- doing something special for your partner to apologize after a fight

Routine maintenance behaviors

Everyday behaviors that help people preserve their bonds with one another (the little things). Seen as more important than strategic behaviors.

3 critical maintenance behaviors in friendship

openness, supportiveness, and positivity

true friends FWB

close friends who add sex to their friendship but don't consider themselves a couple even though they care about each other as friends

network opportunism FWB

partners within the same social network who are not particularly close but who serve as a sexual backup if neither of them is with someone else

Just Sex FWB

sexual partners whose interaction revolves almost exclusively around planning and having sex without any real emotional connection

Transition out (FWB)

ex to sex, previously in a romantic relationship

Intentional transition in (FWB)

sex with the intention of becoming romantic

unintentional transition in (FWB)

sex that becomes more romantic unintentionally

Failed transition (FWB)

sex that failed to become something more

Social Exchange Theory (SET)

a theory based on the assumption that people consciously and deliberately weigh the costs and rewards associated with a relationship or interaction

Interdependence theory

A version of social exchange theory that focuses on the rules predicting how partners will behave toward each other, and how they evaluate the outcomes of their actions.

Comparison Level (CL)

considering what you SHOULD be getting versus what you are actually getting

Comparison Level for Alternatives (CLalt)

considering what you COULD get from a different partner versus what you are actually getting

Uncertainty Reduction Theory

a theory suggesting that people are motivated to reduce their uncertainty about others

Cognitive Uncertainty

occurs when we do not know what the beliefs and attitudes of the other person are

Behavioral Uncertainty

occurs when we do not know how the other person will behave in a particular situation

motivation to reduce uncertainty

strongest when the other person has the capacity to provide rewards or deliver punishments that affect us, their behavior deviates from the norm, or we anticipate future interaction with the person

passive strategy for uncertainty reduction

information gathering approach where one observes others without direct interaction

Reactivity search

passive strategy where one observes how a person reacts to environmental stimuli or situations to gain information about them

Disinhibition search

passive strategy where one observes a person's behavior when they are less inhibited or in more relaxed social situations

active strategy for uncertainty reduction

information gathering approach where one directly seeks information without the target person knowing they are being investigated (asking others, environmental structuring)

interactive strategy for uncertainty reduction

information gathering approach where one directly engages with the target person through conversation and mutual exchange (interrogation or self-disclosure)

Nonverbal communication

Involves all messages other than words or language

Types of Nonverbal communication

1. Body movements

2. Vocal behavior

3. Clothing and appearance

Importance of nonverbal communication

1. tendency for nonverbal behavior to "leak" or show true emotion

2. can sometimes be more important than verbal communication

3. we tend to trust nonverbal more than verbal cues

Nonverbal channels (gesture)

1. emblems - very clear translation without words (ex: peace sign)

2. illustrators - gestures tied to speech

3. regulators - control flow of communication

4. adaptors - used to regulate emotional arousal

Paralanguage

vocal characteristics and temporal patterns that accompany speech

Nonverbal channels (paralanguage)

1. phonetic pause

2. silent pause

3. filled pause

4. response latency

5. speech rate

6. articulation

7. loudness

8. pitch

9. stress

Phonetic Pause

a brief silence that occurs within a word or between syllables (too fast for humans to detect)

Silent pause

silence used for emphasis or effect

Filled pause

A hesitation such as 'um' or 'er'.

Response latency

amount of speaking time between someone stopping speech and the next person starting

Speech Rate

how fast we speak

Articulation

how well we are speaking/pronouncing words

Stress

highlighting or adding emphasis to certain words

Anger and Joy

have the same pitch, loudness, and tempo

Nonverbal channels (touch)

- known as haptics (can indicate liking or dominance)

- a study found that couples in the intermediate stage (dating for short time and not married) engage in most hand to hand contact compared to those in initial or stable stages

Nonverbal channels (gaze)

1. gaze

2. mutual gaze

3. gaze aversion

- can be used to regulate the input of information

- used to demonstrate attraction or dominance

Nonverbal channels (space/proxemics)

1. intimate (very close, usually able to touch)

2. personal (about 4ft, just in arms reach)

3. social (about 4-12 ft, for everyone)

4. public (12+ ft, not interpersonal)

not the same across different cultures

Expectancy Violations Theory (EVT)

- humans have expectations for how others should behave which are influenced by norms

- expectations exert significant influence on impressions and outcomes

- violations are not always negative

Constructs of EVT

1. expectancy (predicted behavior)

2. violation

3. violation valence (the positive/negative value of breach)

4. communicator reward valence (the violator's appeal)

Types of attraction

1. task attraction

2. physical attraction

3. social attraction

Task attraction

attraction to someone's abilities or dependability

Physical attraction

- attraction to someone's physical appearance

- matching hypothesis: more likely to be attracted to someone of similar levels of attraction to yourself

Social attraction

attraction to someone's personality (friends with them)

Factors that affect attraction

1. proximity

2. mere exposure

3. isolation anxiety (attracted to someone who wants to interact with others)

4. similarities (provides self validation)

5. compensatory hypothesis/complementary needs (someone who is strong in an area we are weak)

6. reciprocity of liking (if someone likes us, we reciprocate due to feelings of reward)

Eros

"romantic love"; based on physical attractiveness, love at first sight, emotionally and physically intense (like a sports car)

Ludus

"game playing love"; fun/unserious, friends with benefits, polygamy is more likely

Storge

"friendship love"; very peaceful, caring, respect, friends first

Pragma

"shopping list love"; practical and logical, good fit for each other, realistic

Mania

based on possession and dependent love, starts high then hits a big depression, demanding and obsessive, quick to be jealous

Agape

"all giving, selfless love"; see love as a duty, lots of compassion, expect nothing in return

Model of self

Am I worthy of being loved? (how do i view myself)

Model of others

Are others responsive caregivers? (how do others view me)

Secure attachment

positive model of self, positive model of other; consistent responses from caregiver

Anxious (preoccupied) attachment

negative model of self, positive model of other; inconsistent responses from caregiver

Avoidant (dismissive) attachment

positive model of self, negative model of other; indifferent caregiver

Fearful attachment

negative model of self, negative model of other (high anxiety and avoidance)

Similarity hypothesis

attracted to those with similar attachment style

Complementary hypothesis

attracted to those with an attachment style that fills in the gaps of our own

Attachment-security hypothesis

all individuals show preference for secure attachment people over all other styles

Interpersonal Communication

the production and processing of verbal and nonverbal messages between two or a few persons (Braithwaite & Schrodt)

linear model of communication

one-way view of communication that assumes a message is sent by a source to a receiver through a channel

Feedback

send and receive feedback simultaneously

Noise in Communication

Anything that blocks or distorts clear communication between the sender and receiver of a message.

Physical Noise

external noise that makes a message difficult to hear or otherwise receive (e.g., static on phone call or people talking loudly outside of a classroom)

Psychological Noise

the thoughts and feelings that distract people from listening to what is said (e.g., thinking/stressing about an upcoming exam)

Physiological Noise

biological interference (e.g., being hungry or sleepy)

Semantic Noise

distractions aroused by certain word choices that take our attention away from the main message (e.g., not knowing the meaning of a word the sender uses. Common with cultural differences or jargon.)

transactional model of communication

constant exchange of messages between sender and receiver

Conditions of Interpersonal Communication

intentionality, shared information/meaning, transmission, recognition of relationship (bond)

Three Axioms of Communication

1. One cannot not communicate (there is no such thing as "non-behavior")

2. Every communication has a content (direct) and a relationship (subtle) component. The relationship component classifies the content component and is therefore meta-communication.

3. Punctuation determines meaning (the way we say words changes the meaning)

Situational Approach to Interpersonal Communication

an approach that defines interpersonal communication based on the context and setting in which communication occurs

Developmental approach to interpersonal communication

defines interpersonal communication by the ability to predict a partner's behavior based on accumulated knowledge

Sources of Data for Prediction-Making

1. Cultural level data (knowing about their culture and daily routines)

2. Sociological level data (knowing their specific group memberships and roles in groups)

3. Psychological level data (harder to obtain, but the more you know, the better you can predict. Things that are unique to an individual like always being late, likes reading, rides bike, etc.)

Components of Language

1. Phonemes

2. Syntax

3. Semantics

4. Pragmatics

Phonemes

the sounds we make when pronouncing words

Syntax

how we arrange the words (may or may not change the meaning)

Semantics

meaning of words (can be different based on context)

Pragmatics

the purpose of the words (what do they do for us)