rocky horror brickture show

knock! knock! inspection time

shit!

howdy! how are you two doing this evening?

pretty good! i didn’t know you were making rounds tonight

oh, well, we’re doing pretty good… i mean besides her insatiable desire to pick everything up with her toes so she “doesn’t have to bend down”

what?? it’s efficient!

hmm, i see. so, you two have been getting along decently well?

oh yeah! it’s been great!

you stayed up pretty late? talking??? if you say so (RA jots down notes)

what?

and how have you been finding each other? hot? dirty?

i’m sorry what?

so what clubs have you all signed up for?

well i’m in climbing club-

oh yes! good idea. doc martens… check. carabiner… check-

what could you possibly be checking for?

do you kiss each other?

WHAT???

there is nothing wrong with it. its 2025 and i have plenty of diversity training but i have to know, do you like each other? do you smooch and stuff?

NO!

damn. so you don’t like each other? you aren’t even a little bit gay-ish? not even sometimes?

no! i’m dating a girl from my chem class and she has a boyfriend back home!

you don’t even share a smooch from time to time? wow. i was way off. damn, i was excited to have gays living here. it would be so good for the brand.

well, sorry to disappoint, i guess.