CMN 120V Final Exam

Physical Closeness

the amount of physical space between people

Emotional Closeness

a sense of shared experiences with another person (sharing/caring)

Relational Closeness

interdependence between people

Affectionate Communication

- how we communicate closeness/intimacy; viewed positively

- can be physical (ex: hugging or kissing) or verbal (ex: saying "I love you")

Affection Exchange Theory

A theory that is based on the idea that affectionate communication is a biologically adaptive behavior that evolved because it helps people provide and obtain valuable resources necessary for survival.

Affection Exchange Theory Ideas

- affectionate communication facilitates survival

- people who are affectionate are perceived as having parenting skills (which attracts mates)

- people who are motivated to show affection to those who serve at least one of two basic evolutionary needs: viability and fertility

Viability

we want to show affection to those who can help our genes live on/survive (ex: child, nephew, grandchild)

Fertility

we want to show affection to those who can help us achieve the goal of procreation (spouse or partner)

Triangular Theory of Love

model of love based on three components: intimacy, passion, and commitment; several types of love exist, depending on the presence or absence of each of these components

Intimacy

"warm" part of love

Passion

physical connection, arousal, attraction, romance, desire, "hot" part of love, LEAST STABLE

Commitment

cognitive aspect, relationship maintenance, "cool" part of love

Nonlove

intimacy, passion, and commitment are all absent

Liking

intimacy alone (friendship)

Infatuation

passion alone (experience arousal even though you don't know the person)

Empty Love

commitment only

Romantic Love

intimacy and passion, no commitment

Compassionate Love

intimacy and commitment, no passion

Fatuous Love

passion and commitment, no intimacy (risky)

Consummate Love

intimacy, passion, commitment are all present

The Longevity of Love Study (Miller, 2015)

Miller found that couples who married for love experienced a decline in intimacy after about 4 years, while couples in arranged marriages experienced an increase in love throughout their relationship (basically saying that intimacy dies out)

Why romantic love loses its gusto

1. Fantasy (start thinking more realistically)

2. Novelty (newness of relationship fades away with time)

3. Arousal (less passion and excitement due to experience with partner)

Computed-Mediated Communication (CMC)

communication that occurs through the use of electronic devices

CMC Affordances

1. Possibilities for action (provides an action that would not be possible if we were meeting face to face)

2. "creates a functional difference for the individual" (editability)

3. "enhance their relational outcomes (people use tech to enhance their interpersonal communciation)

Types of Affordances in CMC

1. Limited social cues/bandwidth (nonverbal behavior)

2. Social Presence - how near we feel to the person we are communicating with

3. Time Availability (Asynchronous) - messages are not immediate

4. Editability - time to craft messages and revise

5. Cognitive Reallocation - focus on our message only + Environmental Scanning - aware of additional stimuli

6. Conversational Control - more control over how the conversation goes (easier to ignore)

7. Persistence - have the ability to live forever (ability to reread messages)

Social Presence Theory

argues that relationships CANNOT be formed through CMC

Social Presence Theory Assumptions

- communication media vary in their degree of social presence

- these variations of the media determine the ways individuals interact

- users of a given media are aware of the social presence provided by that media

- users avoid media for some types of interactions

Social Information Processing Theory

people are motivated to form impressions and develop relationships no matter what channel they are using

Social Information Processing Theory Assumptions

1. Relationships development through CMC is possible but will take longer than for face to face

2. Users must adapt the meaning of communicative cues used in CMC (ex: typing in all caps is like shouting)

3. Relational communication changes form initial impersonal levels to more developed forms in CMC (goes through the same communication process)

Hyperpersonal Theory

- there are several instances in which CMC has surpassed the level of affection and emotion of parallel face to face interactions

- hyperpersonal communication is related to foud different elements of the communication process: receivers, senders, feedback, and channel

Hypersonal Theory Elements

1. selective self-presentation (sender) - we get to select our impression and how we present ourselves

2. overattribution of similarity (receiver) - we tend to focus on similarities and forget about differences and end up with an idealized perception

3. asynchronous (channel) - do on your own time

4. self-fulfilling prophecy (feedback) - act in a way that confirms the other person's expectations

Ramirez and Zhang (2007) Findings

Testing level of intimacy in different interactions (CMC, F2F, ect.), the CMC ONLY condition reported the most closeness; supports SIPT and Hyperpersonal Theory, conradicts social presence theory

Affectionate Communication Index (ACI)

scored on a scale of 0-60; 0 being least affectionate and 60 being most affectionate; uses a survey

Deceptive Affective Messages (DAMs)

overt expressions of affection that are not consistent w/ internal feelings

(ex. "I love you" but not feeling it)

(ex. Smiling at partner but being angry)

(ex. Small talk 'I'm good :)')

Warranting Principle

perceiver's judgments about a target rely more heavily on info which the targets themselves cannot manipulate, than on self-descriptions (info can be easily manipulated online so look for things that are hard to falsify)

Catfishing

- a "catfish" is a person who creates fake profiles online and pretends to be someone they are not

- women are more likely to be victims while men are more likely to be the catfish

- anxious attachment is more likely to be both a catfish and a victim

- other possible reasons to catfish: revenge, loneliness, low self-esteem

Passing Away (relational dissolution)

slow decline of relationship (ex: slowly stop communication with an old friend as time passes); slowly loses vitality

Sudden Death (Relational Dissolution)

a discrete event that caused the end of a relationship (ex: cheating); more acknowledged

Divorce Statistics (U.S.)

- 90% of people will get married

- 50% divorce rate for 1st marriages; 60-65% divorce rate for 2nd marriages

- increase from 33% divorce rate in the 1930s

- sharp increase in divorce rate in 1960-70s (1974 recorded more marriages ending in divorce than death)

- years 1-2 and 5-8 is a big divorce window

assortative mating

theory stating that people find partners based on their similarity to each other (divorced people will more likely remarry with other divorced people --> causes higher divorce rates for 2nd marriages)

Reasons for Divorce

- expectations for marriage (what they expect from their partner)

- individualism (people are less connected to the others around them than they used to be)

- perceptions of divorce (decrease in negative feelings toward divorce)

- cohabitation (living together before engagement increases likelihood of divorce)

- family of origin conflict (children who come from divorced families are more likely to get divorced themselves)

Reasons for Relational Dissolution (friendships)

- conscious choice

- atrophy (grow apart mentally)

- seperation (physical distance)

Duck's Phase Model of Relationship Dissolution

1. breakdown (pre-phase)

2. intrapsychic (phase 1)

3. dyadic (phase 2)

4. social (phase 3)

5. gravedressing (phase 4)

6. resurrection (post-phase)

Breakdown (Pre-Phase)

threshold: I can't stand this anymore

intrapsychic (phase 1)

threshold: I'd be justified withdrawing; 1 person reflect on pro/cons of relationship and may talk about it with inner circle

Dyadic (phase 2)

threshold: I mean it (overt communication); confront partner of dissatisfaction (LOTS OF TALKING INVOLVED). only moves to the next phase is relationship cannot be saved.

Social (phase 3)

threshold: it's now inevitable; post-dissolution (decide to be no-contact, friends, FWB, etc.); communicate with others about the end of relationship

Gravedressing (phase 4)

threshold: it's definitely over; coping the end of a relationship (reinterpret characteristics of ex partner), come up with story on how relationship ended

Resurrection (post-phase)

the individual is ready to start dating someone new

Direct Tactics for Relational Dissolution

1. direct dump (ex: just leaving)

2. dating other people

3. justification (explain why it's over)

4. relationship talk trick ("let's have a talk" results in relationship ending)

Indirect Tactics for Relational Dissolution

1. avoidance (66% of time; not effective and causes distress)

2. relational ruses (tell your mutual friend that you plan to break up, friend tells your partner and they break up with you first)

3. withdrawal of supportiveness (stop providing social or emotional support)

4. pseudo de-escalation (we should take a break; nice way to break up but not effective due to confusion)

5. cost escalation (make relationship more costly for partner so they will leave you)

Roles in relationship dissolution

- Leaver (may feel guilty) and Left (may feel rejected)

- both people feel negative psychological feelings, but leaver benefits from being able to prepare for those feelings

- leaver is typically seen more negatively for not trying to make things work

unilateral/bilateral

one side/ both sides

self-other orientation

Does the breakup strategy protect me or them?

Emotional Impact of Relational Loss (Mathes et al.)

- no loss

- fate (killed in an accident)

- rejection (partner says they don't love you anymore)

- rival (cheating)

**study found that RIVAL was the most negative way to lose a partner and FATE was least negative

Passing Away (relational dissolution)

Form of Family

decide who is in the family based on objective criteria (blood, marriage, adoption, etc.)

Function of Family

tasks/things that families do (nuturing)

Interaction of Family

communication that fosters family development

Family of Origin

the family in which one grows up, usually consisting of parents and siblings

Family of procreation/orientation

the family you create (children or close friends)

Olsen's Circumplex Model

Family communication is based on cohesion and adaptability

Cohesion

intimacy, closeness, or emotional connection that family members have

Cohesion Spectrum

1. Disengaged - low cohesion (high autonomy, people encouraged to do their own thing)

2. Separated - low to moderate cohesion (more autonomy but some family identification matters)

3. Connected - moderate to high (values identifying the family more than autonomy, but there will still be some autonomy in the family)

4. Enmeshed - high cohesion (overidentification, loyalty, consensus, lack or individualism)

*Research says that functional families have moderate levels of cohesion

Adaptability

the ability to change roles/power structures in moments of stress or change

Adaptability Spectrum

1. Rigid - low adaptability (hard time adjusting to stress/change; very traditional)

2. Structured - low to moderate adaptability (highly values rules and control, but can also make adjustments)

3. Flexible - moderate to high (rules are matter less, still some expectations)

4. Chaotic - high adaptability (easy to change or adjust; more carefree)

*Research suggests being at moderate levels

Family Systems Theory

views the family as an open and ongoing system

Open (family systems)

how they influence and are influenced by the environment (ex: involvement in community spaces like clubs or sports)

Ongoing (family systems)

past, present, future

Family Charateristics and Processes

1. interdependence/mutual influence - changes in one part of the family will influence other parts/cycle of behavior

2. wholeness - consider the family as an entire unit

3. patterns and rules

4. calibration and feedback - checking if rules are followed and provide correction or affirming feedback

5. adaptation - be able to adjust

6. equifinality - take different paths to arrive at the same goal

multifinality - same inputs, not the same outcomes

7. organizational complexity

Internal Functions of Family Communication

1. providing care - food, shelter, etc.

2. socialization - teach politeness and morals

3. intellectual development - facilitate academic achievement

4. recreation - provide opportunities for play or fun

5. social support

External Functions of Family Communication

1. transmission - teach culture so those values live on

2. accomodation

Courtship and early marriage research findings

- initial attraction is a poor predictor

- people filter out information on compatibility (FILTER THEORY)

- sleeper effect on conflict (initial conflict is not important, but conflict later on will be irreparable)

Winch's (1958) complementary needs

two stages:

1. initially focus on similarity

2. later we want/need someone who is strong in our weak areas

transition to parenthood: facts and findings (CRITICAL TRANSITION HYPOTHESIS)

- many couple have children (takes up 50-70% of relationship)

- children have a negative impact on marriage quality (curvilinear)

- empty nest period increased satisfaction

Negative influences of children on marriage quality

- time together and relationship opportunities decrease due to childcare

- childrearing disagreements

- psychological wellbeing (children can cause stress)

Separation and divorce findings

- 50% of first marriages formed in past decade will end in divorce

- unrealistic, idealistic, and romanticized ideas

- few societal barriers

- divorce is not an event, it's a process

Components of divorce that must be dissolved

- love

- attachment to routine

- attachment to role

- legal commitment

orderly divorce

all components are fully dissolved

disorderly divorce

at least one component is not dissolved

Divorce in name only

legal dissolved

i wish it haden't happened

legal and routine dissolved

i've got you under my skin

legal, routine, and role dissolved

common law arrangement

legal and role dissolved

why not be roomates

legal and love dissolved

marriage has its advantages

love and routine dissolved

business as usual

legal, love, role dissolved

Commitment to spouse

i can easily confide in my partner

Commitment to Marriage

divorce is wrong

Feelings of Entrapment

ending my relationship would cause a lot of trouble for me (negative satisfaction)

Distressed vs Non-Distressed marriages

- distressed marriages diminish positive events and exaggerate negative events

- non-distressed marriages do the opposite and downplay negative events while exaggerating positive events

Ghosting

unilaterally ceasing communication in an effort to withdraw access to individual(s) prompting relationship dissolution commonly enacted via one or multiple technological mediums

Enacting ghosting

- sudden ghosting: don't text back at all

- gradual ghosting: slowly fade out communication

- short-term ghosting: not replying due to situational factors like vacation, distraction, etc.

- long-term ghosting: no intention to talk to that person again in the future

**ghosting is most common in combination of SUDDEN + LONG-TERM

Ghosting Motivations

- convenience: easier to do than set up a time to end relationship

- decreases in attractiveness: no long attracted to partner in some way

- negatively valenced interaction: partner makes ghoster upset, frustrated, angry, etc.

- safety: ghoster experienced uncertainty or danger (self-protection)

Identifying Ghosting

- absenteeism in communication: person being ghosted realizes ghoster is becoming absent

- inadequate reciprocity: short replies or no reply at all

Deception

intentional behavior that creates an impression in the recipient that the deceiver knows is false

Deceptive Strategies

- fabrication creates fiction (no part of a statement is true)

- concealment/omission hides a secret (some part of the statement is true, but does not contain the WHOLE truth)

- equivocation/diversion dodges the issue (avoid the topic entirely; try to change the subject)

- half-truths (ex: I have a car and it's a Corvette. The truth is I have a car but the lie is that its a corvette.)

Interpersonal Deception Theory (IDT)

- argues that we not as good at detecting deception as we think we are (due to no consistent sign of deception in humans)

- argues that we need to understand communication as interactive (we adjust behaviors in response to feedback when being deceptive)

- strategic deception takes mental effort (task demands). an overload of demands can cause leakage.

Goals of Deceptive Acts

- accomplish a specific task

- establish or maintain a relationship

- save face or sustain image of one or both parties

4 messages characteristics that reflect strategic intent

1. uncertainty or vagueness

2. withdrawal

3. dissociation

4. image/relationship protecting behavior (try to suppress cues that might signal deception)

*deception success depends on quality of message and control of non-strategic cues