Public Speaking Ch. 7

commitment

A decision to remain with a relationship. One of three dimensions of enduring romantic relationships, commitment has more impact on relational continuity than does love alone. It is also an advanced stage in the process of escalation in romantic relationships.

gaslighting

Abusive, covert manipulation that misleads the target about their own experiences, causing them to question their own judgments, undermining their perceptions of reality.

investments

Something put into a relationship that cannot be recovered should the relationship end. Investments, more than rewards and love, increase commitment.

neutralization

One of the four responses to relational dialectics; involves balancing or finding a compromise between two dialectical poles.

passion

Intensely positive feelings and desires for another person. Passion is based on the rewards of involvement and is not equivalent to commitment.

personal relationships

A relationship defined by uniqueness, rules, relational dialectics, and commitment and affected by contexts. Personal relationships, unlike social ones, are irreplaceable.

psychological responsibility

The responsibility for remembering, planning, and coordinating domestic work and child care. In general, women assume the psychological responsibility for child care and housework even if both partners share in the actual tasks.

reframing

One of four responses to relational dialectics. The reframing response transcends the apparent contradiction between two dialectical poles and reinterprets them as not in tension.

relational culture

A private world of rules, understandings, and patterns of acting and interpreting that partners create to give meaning to their relationship; the nucleus of intimacy.

relational dialectics

Opposing forces or tensions that are normal parts of all relationships. The three relational dialectics are autonomy/connectedness, novelty/predictability, and openness/closedness.

rules

Patterned ways of behaving and interpreting behavior; all relationships develop rules.

segmentation

One of four responses to relational dialectics. Segmentation responses meet one dialectical need while ignoring or not satisfying the contradictory dialectical need.

separation

One of four responses to relational dialectics, in which friends or romantic partners assign one pole of a dialectic to certain spheres of activities or topics and the contradictory dialectical pole to distinct spheres of activities or topics.

stonewalling

Refusal to discuss issues that are creating tension in a relationship. Stonewalling is especially corrosive in relationships because it blocks the possibility of resolving conflicts.