Cooley, The Self & Family, Gender, Ethnicity, and Nationality

Human Nature and the Social Order

Written by Cooley introducing the “Looking-Glass Self”—an individual’s self-concept is largely shaped by how they believe others perceive them

Imagination of our appearance to others

We imagine how we appear to other people

Imagination of their judgement

We imagine how others evaluate that appearance

Self-feeling

We develop feelings (such as pride or shame) based on our perception of others’ judgement

Primary group

Family, close friends, and early peer groups shape identity through intimate, lasting relationships

Interdependent and co-constitutive

Cooley’s view on society and individual

George Herbert Mead

Elaborated on the self as both subject (“I”) and object (“Me”) in interaction

Erving Goffman

Applied Cooley’s insights to dramaturgical analysis, exploring how the self is performed and managed in social settings

William James

Differentiated between the “I” (the self as the knower) and the “Me” (the self as known)

This duality underscores that the self is both active in interpreting experiences and shaped by them

Family as a socializing agent

First significant others in a child’s life

Meet physical needs, provide emotional support, and serve as role models

Psychosocial Theory

According to Erik Erikson, the earliest stages of life involve trust-building and the development of autonomy—tasks that are largely influenced by parental interaction

Attachment Theory

Developed by John Bowlby; Secure attachment with caregivers provides a stable foundation for positive self-concept and psychological resilience

Insecure attachments can lead to low self-esteem and difficulties in social relationships later in life

Sibling influence

Provide a unique peer-like relationship that fosters social skills and identity development through both conflict and cooperation

Extended family influence

Reinforce cultural values, familial narratives, and social expectations, which further solidify an individual’s place within a broader identity framework

Individualistic societies

The self is often seen as independent and autonomous (e.g., US and much of Western Europe)

Families in these cultures typically encourage personal achievement, self-expression, and independence from an early age

Collectivist cultures

The self is understood as interdependent (e.g., Asia, Africa, and Latin America)

Identity is deeply tied to family roles, duties, and expectations

Narrative psychology

Emphasizes the role of storytelling in self-construction

McAdams suggests that individuals internalize these stories to create a coherent life narrative that integrates personal experience with family and cultural heritage

Incongruence

A mismatch between the self-concept and lived experience (Carl Rogers, 1951)

Individuation

Separating oneself from familial norms to form an independent identity

Key step in developing self-agency and authenticity

Gender

Refers to the roles, behaviors, expectations, and identities that society attributes to people based on their perceived sex

A social construct that varies across cultures and historical periods (Butler, 1990)

Ethnicity

A category that relates to shared cultural practices, languages, traditions, ancestry, and sometimes religion or race

Develops over time and is shaped by experiences of inclusion and exclusion

Can result in either a strengthened sense of identity or identity confusion

Nationality

Refers to one’s legal or emotional affiliation with a nation-state

Includes feelings of loyalty, pride, and belonging to a particular country

Hybrid identity formation

Migration, diaspora, and mixed parentage foster identities tied to multiple nationalities

In-Betweenness

Individuals may feel caught between cultures, creating complex self-concepts (Hall, 1990)

Can enrich identity or cause internal conflict, depending on context and coping skills

Intersectionality Theory

Emphasizes the interdependent and cumulative nature of social categorizations in shaping experiences and inequalities (Crenshaw, 1989)