Fosgate Violet lines

Felicity: Oh god, this is going to get old quickly- let’s get it over with. Ladies first, dear.

Violet: My name is Violet, and I’m a sheep!

Fosgate: Andy Serkis is now in control of “That place.” He’s going to release an animated film!

Violet: Thats right! And we’re all perfect performers for the roles!

Fosgate: But then they were all suddenly fired! They migrated to urban areas, seeking gainful employment

Violet: I was fortunate. I’ve recently secured a position as Fosgate’s secretary with my accountancy background

Fosgate: (calling offstage) Violet!

Violet: Yes, sir?

Fosgate: Tea please

Violet: Certainly, sir. Hiya!

End of ‘Really going to get good’

Violet: Your tea gents. Try this, its new.

Henry: mmmm, Delicious

Violet: Got it from a collective of free-trade Koala Bears down the Mersey

Fosgate: violet, whats all this sludge at the bottom?

Violet: Sorry Sir, the Koala Tea of Mersey is not strained

Fosgate: Almost one small matter. This. The title. Violet dear, could you retrieve five hundred pounds in cash for our equine friend here?

Violet: Certainly Sir!

Fosgate: Why thank you, sir. Be sure to tell all your title-owning friends about Fosgate, ferret loan officer.

Violet: Here you go love!

Fosgate: Good day to you, fine sir! That was an easy one.

Violet: And what a generous offer you made him, sir.

Fosgate: Generous? hardly. That Landau carriage is easily worth four times what I lent, not even mounting collector appeal. Can’t wait to put that one up at auction.

Violet: I don’t understand. Its not yours.

Fosgate: It will be. Violet, dear, I couldnt pay your salary if I were too generous… (skipping middle part) I only said “Farm” Theres no copywright on the word “Farm!”

Violet: But Henry seems such a kind and gentle sort.

Fosgate: Thats why hes headed for extinction dear. PLease file all this, im feeling a bit peckish. Be back after Lunch

Violet: SONG

Rufus: Lucky shot that was! Let’s get some seaside footage next.

Violet: Henry, love, could I have a quick word with you?

Rufus: Keep it breif, time is money

Violet: I dont suppose you’ve had a moment to read the fine print on your loan contract?

Rufus: Violet, if Henry makes the minimum payment every week, when will he be paid up?

Violet: Never! He’ll owe a thousand in six weeks. There’s no end to it.

Rufus: Pay down that debt Henry.

Violet: And dont be late or miss payments! The interest rate skyrockets and your carriage could be seized!

Rufus: Wait. You work for the weasel. Why are you concerned?

Violet: Conscience

Henry: Violet, dont worry. Im going to be a success. You’ll see me in the shop every week with my payment.

Violet: I believe you, love. I only worry because I dont want to see you at the bottom of the fine print.

Henry: Whats at the bottom of the fine print?

Violet: You’re better off not thinking about it. See you in the shop on due day?

Rufus: Yes, definitely plan three. What? Like I was going to share with everyone and ruin the suspense? Bugger off.

Violet: Here are the recent defaults, sir.

Henry: It’s so much better! I’ve been all over Blackpool. Everyone wants a ride in my carriage!

Violet: Thats wonderful!

Henry” I’ll be making my first payment right on time. And thank you, Violet, for alerting me to the timetable! I might have defaulted!

Violet: Heh, heh,,, it was nothing, love.

Fosgate: Exactly what did you tell him, dear?

Violet: Only what was in the contract! I like Henry! I didnt want to see him default!

Fosgate: But how did you manage to read all those little words?

Violet: I am an ewe. hath not a ewe eyes?

Fosgate: Your concern is touching. For that matter, it may improve proceedings. He’ll get more of his debt paid down before I get my hands on that carriage.

Violet: You’ll make a handsome profit even if he pays you back every penny!

Henry: My carriage is gone!

Violet: What?

Henry: I left it parked right out front and it’s not there!

Violet: I’ll call the police!

Fosgate: A plausible alibi, as all good fictions are.

Violet: I’m calling the police now!

Henry: Whats the clause of last resort?

Violet: It’s best not to talk about it, dear.

Henry: WHAT IS THE CLAUSE OF LAST RESORT?!

Violet: I hoped it would never come to this, love.

Fosgate: Most certainly, sire, it is my only recourse

Violet: For the love of all things bright and beautiful, couldn’t you just take some time and work something out?

Felicity: You too, dear. Your testimony will be crucial for our countersuit.

Violet: Heavens! Am I a shill?

Felicity: Did you pretend to take out a loan in order to entice others to follow suit?

Violet: No, miss, I did nothing of the sort. I just work here.

Felicity: I call Violet, the secretary sheep. Violet, how would you describe Fosgates buisness practices.

Violet: Remarkably knowledgeable of loopholes

Sherman: Im sorry! Oh God Im sorry!

Violet: I can’t watch!

Rufus: take the deal, or not. But really, what choice have you got?

Violet: Henry, I’ll co-sign with you! I can be an investor! Or maybe your secretary! The possibilities…

CAST: BORROW RESPONSIBLY, WE HOPE THIS PART IS UNDERSTOOD

Violet: Is there a moral to this story?