Chapter 4 communication

Language is symbolic

Words are the primary symbols that we use to represent people, objects, events, and ideas

Example of language is symbolic

for example, they have over 200 words that describe variations; they have over 600 words for wind (Dekneef, 2016). Thus, when you share a common language, you can use specific words unique to that language to communicate ideas and thoughts about particular subjects. Moreover, using words as symbols is a uniquely human ability (Wade, 2010); the words you use are symbolic in your culture, as are the "bird whistle" words of shepherds in Northern Turkey — another endangered language (Frost, 2017).

Example of Thought Informs Language

Jamal Henderson is applying to colleges. He keeps his father, Michael, involved in the process because he values his opinion. They both agree that Jamal should attend a "good college." But Michael feels hurt when Jamal starts talking seriously about a community college in another state. He thinks his son has ruled out his own alma mater, the local campus of the state university system. Jamal and Michael have different thoughts about what a "good college" is. Their language and thoughts are related in their own minds, and each thinks he is using the term appropriately.

Language Is ruled by grammar

for example, must remember that the grammar of Romance languages (such as French and Spanish) requires a different syntax. In English, adjectives typically precede a noun ("I have an intelligent dog"), whereas in Spanish, adjectives follow the noun ("Tengo un perro inteligente, " literally translated as "I have a dog intelligent"). To communicate clearly in Spanish, an English speaker must adjust.

Using Language to Share Information

In small town Guymon, Oklahoma, with a population of fewer than 12,000 people, residents speak more than 37 languages. Aside from the obvious challenges of teaching children in the schools, there are tremendous challenges when a tornado, wildfire, or blizzard hits; radio stations send out warnings in English and Spanish, but these languages are not understood by many in the community. As children in the schools learn English (and become more social media savvy), it is oen up to them to share the emergency information with their families (McCleland, 2019). This functional competency of using language to give and receive information is informing. If you have ever been asked for directions, you know that providing people with information that they can understand and being able to comprehend the information they are conveying to you are equally important skills.

express creativity

imagining

Using Language to Express Creativity

For example, Elliot expresses frustration with his staff by yelling at them; his staff responds by mocking Elliot at a local pub aer work. Instead, Elliot could have said, "I'm worried that we're not going to make the deadline on this project"; someone on his staff could have said, "I'm feeling tense about making the deadline, too, but I'm also confused about why you yelled at me." Sometimes, appropriate and effective communication means avoiding expressing feelings that we consider inappropriate or risky in a given situation (Burleson, Holmstrom, & Gilstrap, 2005).

For example, when Abby's boyfriend suggests sharing an apartment next semester, Abby changes the subject to avoid admitting that she is uncomfortable taking that step.

Language and Meaning

By attending to the language and meaning used by clients, therapists can gain an understanding of their lived reality and how they experience the meaning of situations, relationships, others, and self.

Language and Meaning

Imagine three-year-old Damon sitting in a house of worship with his parents. He is having a great time banging his plastic dinosaurs around until his mother grabs them away during a silent part of the service. Clearly upset, Damon calls her a nasty name. His mother's face turns bright red, and she escorts Damon out to the car. Damon associated his language with the concept of being unhappy; he was upset about his mom taking his toys, so he said the same word he had probably heard a family member use when that person was unhappy with someone.

Words have multiple meanings

denotative and connotative

example of Words have multiple meanings

For example, your grandfather offers to give you $10,000 if you graduate with honors from college. Is his offer a bribe, a reward, or an incentive? How you perceive and process his offer depends on the meaning associated with the language used. You may resent your grandfather if you consider the money a bribe, feel proud if you earn your reward, or feel motivated by the incentive.

evasion

an act of escaping or avoiding

example of evasion

for example, might tell her parents that she is "going out with some friends" to avoid telling them what they might be upset about, such as "going drinking at Ragin' Harry's Party with Fernanda, Justin, and Derek." But evasive language is not always deceptive; it can also be effective for withholding information that we don't believe it is appropriate for others to know

For example, if you ask your instructor if a particular concept will be on the exam, she might reply "Every concept in the textbook is fair game." She is purposely evading the yes/no answer, probably because she wants you to study all of the course material and does not want to give away what the specific test questions will be.

Euphemism

an inoffensive expression that is substituted for one that is considered offensive

Example of Euphemism

For example, you might say that your uncle "passed on" rather than is "dead" or that your mother had a "procedure" rather than an "operation." Other than the roasted pig at Hawaiian Luaus, menus usually use the word "pork" to avoid a number of negative associations with the word "pig" (McWilliams, 2016). In each of these examples, the denotative meanings of the words are the same — "passed on" and "dead" both refer to someone who is no longer living. What is different is that "passed on" or "passed away" feels less bad or at least less emotionally blunt than "dead." These more abstract phrases may thus be more culturally appropriate in many contexts, such as when someone is grieving the death of a loved one. Note, however, that in our attempt to lessen negative emotion, our euphemisms may sometimes end up being so vague that the meaning is unclear. For example, if your boss announces that one of your coworkers is unfortunately "no longer with us, " that might mean that the coworker has died, but it could also just mean that they have le the company!

Microaggressions

common, everyday verbal or behavioral indignities and slights that communicate hostile, derogatory, and negative messages about someone's race, gender, sexual orientation, or religion

hurtful language

inappropriate, damaging, mean, sarcastic, or offensive statements that affect others in negative ways

Example of Microaggressions and hurtful language

For example, suppose you sign up for a class with a young faculty member of color and express in surprise on the first day "Oh, you're the professor? Wow." Whether your surprise was based on the professor's youth, race, attractiveness, or something else, it may come across as hurtful because it could be interpreted as implying that it is not "normal" for "someone like me" to be a professor, even if that was not your intent. Similarly, perhaps you think it's a compliment to tell someone "Your English is really good." It might be a compliment, if you know that the person actually has just learned English. But in many cases this is said to native English speakers just because they are not white! In the workplace, immigrant professionals suffer from microaggressions that dismiss them as less intelligent or competent (Shenoy-Packer, 2015). Often the "microaggressed" band together to laugh about the microaggressions they've experienced and give one another support in how to deal with them (Davis, 2019). Microaggressions can be nonverbal too, such as changing seats to avoid sitting by someone or holding belongings more tightly

Labeling

identifying the names of objects

Example of Labeling

For example, research shows that women who call themselves "feminists" are judged as warmer but less competent than women who share the same gender-equality beliefs but do not label themselves "feminists" (Meijs, Ratliff, & Lammers, 2019). Recall from earlier in this chapter that words have both connotative and denotative meanings. For many people, the "feminist" label may be positive, but for others, it may be negative. Many labels are problematic because the terms have widespread negative connotations. Efforts to change labels are often attempting to remove that negativity.

For example, the U.S. Department of Justice has recognized that labels such as "felon" and "convict" create vivid negative images in the mind of the listener that makes it difficult for the person to overcome. So some officials now recommend using more neutral terms such as "person who committed a crime" or a "person who was incarcerated" instead (New York Times editorial, 2016).

biased language

word choice that suggests prejudice or preconceptions about other people

Example of Biased language

For example, older individuals struggling with dementia are sensitive to language that implies that they are childlike ("Did you eat your dinner like a good boy?") because they are struggling to maintain their dignity. Similarly, there are many derogatory terms for women who engage in casual sex, but men who engage in similar behaviors in similar situations are afforded less derogatory labels (she is "easy"; he is a "player"). Such language perpetuates perceptions of women as less intelligent, less mentally healthy, and less competent than men in similar relationships or situations (Conley, 2011; Jacobs, 2012).

politically correct language

language that replaces exclusive or negative words with more neutral terms

Example of political language

For example, the terms firefighter, police officer, and chair replace the sexist terms fireman, policeman, and chairman, reflecting and perhaps influencing the fact that these once male-dominated positions are now open to women as well. And as we discussed earlier, the labels "felon" and "addict" may be giving way to more politically correct labels that sound less judgmental. Critics of political correctness argue that such attempts at sensitivity and neutrality can undermine communication, as they substitute vague euphemisms for clarity when dealing with difficult subjects and place certain words off-limits (O'Neill, 2011). For example, calling someone "visually impaired" instead of "blind" may sound nicer, but it also is not clear about the severity of the person's lack of sight and may even suggest that there is some "shame" in being blind if we cannot speak of it openly. But others note that there is value in trying to be sensitive when we make choices regarding language.

slang

informal language

Example of slang

For example, slang is language that is informal, nonstandard, and usually particular to a specific age or social group; it operates as a high-level abstraction because its meanings are known only by its users during a specific time in history. A rock concert might be described as "wild, " "awesome, " or "lit" — each expression places the speaker in a particular time or place in the world. Teenagers might alert each other online that they have "GTG" (got to go) because of "POS" (parent over shoulder), and their parents are none the wiser. Slang is oen intensified by adjectives that increase emphasis, such as absolutely, completely, extremely, totally, wickedly, or massively (Palacios Martínez & Núñez Pertejo, 2012). Slang evolves and changes over time, with some words disappearing and others enduring — a clear contradiction of the concept of language as static and uniform (Stamper, 2014).

Geography

Study of the earth

Example of Geography

Our editor from New Jersey assures us that even in such a small state, it makes a big difference if you are from North Jersey or South Jersey. (The status of people from the middle part of the state remains unclear, at least to us.) People in North Jersey eat subs (sandwiches that you buy at 7-Eleven or QuickChek) and Italian ice (a frozen dessert). The night before Halloween, when shaving cream and toilet paper abound, is Goosey Night or Cabbage Night. And "the city" is, of course, New York City. On the other hand, people from South Jersey eat hoagies (typically from a convenience store called Wawa) and water ice. The night before Halloween is Mischief Night. And going to "the city" means taking a trip to Philadelphia. (For the record, in the Bay Area of California, "the city" is San Francisco.)

Mediated Contexts

Communication via technology requires strong, clear language

Example of Mediated Contexts

for example, people who were assigned avatars of their own gender were more likely to use gendertypical language (more emotional expressions and tentative language if assigned a feminine avatar) than those assigned mismatched avatars (Palomares & Lee, 2010). Another study found that people infer a person's sex from language cues online (e.g., amount of self-disclosure, expression of emotion) and conform more to computer-mediated partners when they believe them to be male (Lee, 2007). And, in a sad parallel to gender language norms in face-to-face settings, a study of sexting among adolescents found that girls were judged negatively whether they sexted (e.g., "slut") or not (e.g., "prude"; Lippman & Campbell, 2014).