BYWM & Follower essay comparison

from an example essay

Thesis

Both "Before You Were Mine" (BYWM) and "Follower" establish the foundational relationship between parent and child by celebrating the parent's vibrant or expert past self

however, they diverge significantly in how they portray the nature and timing of the resulting role reversal and shift in control, demonstrating different costs of familial dependency.

para 1 point

• Both poems suggest the parent's past self is formidable/admirable

• either through vibrant youth or physical mastery

• establishing an admirable figure for the child to observe

para one quotes BYWM 

• ‘bend from the waist holding each other or your knees and shriek at the pavement’

• "Your polka-dot dress blows round your legs. Marilyn.".

• "That glamorous love lasts where you sparkle and waltz and shine

para 1 follower quotes

• "expert"

• "His shoulders globed like a full sail strung / Between the shafts and the furrow.".

• "Mapping the furrow exactly."

para 2 point

BYWM suggests the child is the agent of change,

leading to a sense of regretful possession and an immediate loss of the parent's former identity

while Follower suggests the parent’s inevitable physical decline is the agent of change (circle of life)

resulting in a delayed, functional role reversal

para 2 BYWM quotes

• "The decade ahead of my loud, possessive yell was the best one, eh?".

• The daughter believes she took possession of her mother forever.

• "relics," such as the "high-heeled red shoes".

para 2 follower quotes

• "nuisance, tripping, falling," while he "did was follow / In his broad shadow".

• → shift in power not based on the child's birth, but on the father's decline. The son initially felt inferior, stumbling and being a

•  complete "role reversal" achieved only in the present due to the father's infirmity.

• "But today / It is my father who keeps stumbling / Behind me, and will not go away.".

• →The son’s current situation is defined by the elderly father’s persistence

conc

• love between parents and children is deep but changes over time

• children realise parents aren’t perfect

• family bonds can remain strong even as roles shift