Chapter 15: Close Relationships

Knowledge components close relationships

Knowledge means knowing intimate personal information about a partner and sharing private thoughts feelings and history

Caring in relationships

Caring refers to affection concern and emotional warmth felt toward a partner in a close relationship

Interdependence in relationships

Interdependence means each partners actions significantly influence the other over time

Mutuality in relationships

Mutuality is the sense that partners view themselves as an interconnected unit rather than separate individuals

Trust in relationships

Trust means expecting a partner to be fair responsive and not cause unnecessary harm

Commitment in relationships

Commitment is investing time effort and resources in a relationship with expectation it will continue

Parasocial relationships

Parasocial relationships are one sided emotional bonds with media figures celebrities or fictional characters without face to face interaction

Characteristics of parasocial relationships

Parasocial relationships can include perceived knowledge caring and commitment but lack true interdependence

Importance of close relationships

Close relationships provide emotional support practical help resource sharing and psychological security

Romantic love definition

Romantic love is an intense emotional bond involving attachment intimacy and sexual attraction toward a partner

Culture and love

Culture shapes romantic love by influencing beliefs about who to love when to love and how love should be expressed

Attachment theory of love

Attachment theory explains love as an extension of early caregiver bonds that create lifelong expectations about security in relationships

Working models of relationships

Working models are internal beliefs about trustworthiness of others and the value of close relationships shaped by early attachment

Secure attachment style

Secure attachment is low anxiety and low avoidance with trust comfort with intimacy and stable satisfying relationships

Anxious ambivalent attachment style

Anxious ambivalent attachment is high anxiety and low avoidance with fear of abandonment and emotionally intense unstable relationships

Avoidant attachment style

Avoidant attachment is high avoidance with discomfort with closeness emotional distance and difficulty trusting partners

Fearful avoidant attachment

Fearful avoidant attachment is high anxiety and high avoidance with fear of rejection distrust and desire for distance

Dismissive avoidant attachment

Dismissive avoidant attachment is low anxiety and high avoidance with self reliance emotional distance and low desire for closeness

Terror management theory and love

Terror management theory proposes that close relationships help people cope with fear of death by providing meaning self worth and security

Self expansion model of love

The self expansion model proposes that people seek relationships to expand identity gain new experiences and increase personal growth

Inclusion of other in self scale

The inclusion of other in self scale measures closeness by assessing perceived overlap between self and partner as overlapping circles

Two factor theory of love

The two factor theory explains love as physiological arousal labeled as attraction or love based on contextual cues

Excitation transfer in attraction

Excitation transfer is when physiological arousal from one source increases romantic attraction when misattributed to another person

Triangular model of love

The triangular model states that love consists of passion intimacy and commitment which combine to form different types of love

Passion in Sternberg model

Passion is sexual attraction excitement and intense desire for a partner in romantic relationships

Intimacy in Sternberg model

Intimacy is emotional closeness sharing understanding and support between partners

Commitment in Sternberg model

Commitment is the decision to maintain a relationship long term with investment in its continuation

Social exchange model

People evaluate relationships by weighing perceived benefits against costs and are more satisfied when rewards exceed costs and comparison level expectations are met

Comparison level

The standard expectation of how rewarding a relationship should be shaped by culture upbringing and personal experience

Relationship costs

The negative aspects of a relationship such as effort time stress or emotional strain that reduce overall satisfaction

Relationship benefits

The positive aspects of a relationship including emotional support financial security sexual access and social approval

Equity theory

The idea that partners are motivated to maintain fairness where the ratio of outcomes to inputs is similar for both partners

Outcomes

The rewards or benefits a person receives from a relationship such as affection support or resources

Inputs

The contributions or investments a person makes in a relationship such as effort time or resources

Perceived inequity

The subjective feeling that one partner is getting more or less benefits relative to their contributions leading to guilt anger or resentment

Assortative mating

The tendency for people to form relationships with others who are similar to them in social status attractiveness or other hierarchy related traits

Matching phenomenon

The specific tendency for people to pair romantically with others who are similar in physical attractiveness

Collectivistic culture influence

The tendency for family approval and group harmony to strongly shape relationship and marriage decisions in collectivistic societies

Self expressive marriage model

The modern view of marriage where relationships are expected to provide personal growth self fulfillment and emotional satisfaction

Self-disclosure

The sharing of information about oneself that increases in depth over time and helps build intimacy in romantic relationships

Stimulus value role theory

A model of relationship development where attraction begins with physical cues then shared values then role compatibility becomes central later

Stimulus stage

The early phase of relationships where attraction is based mainly on observable traits like appearance and age

Value stage

The mid phase of relationships where partners compare attitudes beliefs and interests to judge compatibility

Role stage

The later phase of relationships where partners evaluate compatibility in life roles like parenting work and long term plans

Self disclosure reciprocity

The pattern where partners tend to match each other in depth of personal sharing during early relationship development

TMI effect in relationships

The idea that too much self disclosure too early can feel uncomfortable and reduce attraction

Small talk function

Early low depth communication that helps initiate contact and build initial comfort between potential partners

Positive illusions

Idealized perceptions of a romantic partner that emphasize strengths and minimize or reinterpret weaknesses

Cognitive dissonance in relationships

The tendency to reduce discomfort after choosing a partner by viewing that partner more positively and alternatives less favorably

Ideal partner bias

The tendency to see a current partner as uniquely suited and other potential partners as less attractive

Interdependence in relationships

The increasing mutual reliance between partners that can improve closeness but also increase conflict

Relational turbulence model

A theory that predicts relationship stress rises when partners shift from independence to interdependence

Early relationship satisfaction peak

The pattern where romantic satisfaction rises quickly early on due to novelty intimacy and positive bias

Relationship plateau

The leveling off of satisfaction after early increases as partners adjust to each other and daily realities

Marital satisfaction decline

The average long term trend where relationship satisfaction decreases over time especially after early marriage years

Unrealistic marital expectations

Beliefs that marriage will be effortless or constantly rewarding which often leads to disappointment later

Slacking off effect

The reduction in effort kindness and courtship behaviors after commitment which lowers perceived rewards

Conflict magnification

The process where interdependence makes small annoyances feel larger due to constant exposure and dependence

Sore spot exposure

The increased emotional vulnerability in relationships because partners know each other’s weaknesses and secrets

Fatal attractions

Initially attractive traits in a partner that later become sources of irritation or dissatisfaction over time

Parenthood stress effect

The decline in marital satisfaction due to increased demands reduced time and higher responsibility after children arrive

Passionate love decline

The gradual reduction of intense romantic passion over time due to familiarity and reduced novelty

Breakup emotional pattern

The typical experience of strong initial anger followed by longer lasting sadness after relationship dissolution

Self compassion recovery

The tendency for individuals who treat themselves kindly after breakup to recover more quickly emotionally

Attachment security breakup effect

Securely attached individuals recover faster from breakups while anxious individuals struggle due to persistent attachment needs

Four Horsemen of relationship dissolution

criticism contempt defensiveness and stonewalling form a cascading pattern of communication that predicts breakup and long term relational failure

Interdependence theory

commitment depends on satisfaction level investment level and quality of alternatives with higher commitment when satisfaction and investment are high and alternatives are low

Comparison level for alternatives

perception of the quality of other available partners which reduces commitment when alternatives seem better and increases staying in current relationships when alternatives seem weak

Investment model of commitment

resources such as time money shared experiences and social networks increase psychological cost of leaving a relationship even when satisfaction declines

Stimulus value role theory

relationships progress from attraction based on physical cues to shared beliefs and then to long term roles involving life plans responsibilities and compatibility

Positive illusions

idealized perceptions of a partner that emphasize strengths and minimize faults which can increase satisfaction trust and commitment when not fully detached from reality

Relational turbulence model

increasing interdependence creates disruption and conflict as partners adjust routines but successful coordination over time reduces turmoil and improves stability

Attribution in daily hassles

happy couples explain partner mistakes through external circumstances while distressed couples blame internal traits which increases conflict and lowers satisfaction

EVLN conflict model

exit voice loyalty and neglect describe responses to relationship problems with voice being the most constructive approach for resolving conflict and improving outcomes

Relationship maintenance strategies

long term success depends on mutual support novelty shared experiences constructive communication and continued personal growth of both partners