Relationship and Attachment

Childhood Attachment

• First relationship are with early caregivers, which set stage, for later relationship

Attachment

Link between a child and primary caregiver `

WHat does a care giver provide

Secure Base for exploration

Safe Haven in times of distress

Attachment theory

• Explores how early experience shapes personalities and adult relationship

Attachment behavioral system

What prompts and drives someone to seek their caregicer

Caregiving behavioral syste,

What drives caaregiver to act as a proider and safe figure for another

How?

Development of internal working models

If caregiver is emotionally warm and reliable

Children more likely to view relationships as stable and secure

Caregiver is cold and unsupportive

Children more likley to develop a negatuve view

How does it applies to all mammalls

Highlights the evolutionary value of attachment behavioral system`

Harlow: baby rhesus monkeys

Prefer cloths mother rather than wired mothers

Secure Attachment

Trusting and open

• Caregiver is a source of comfort and security

  • Best psychological outcomes

Insecure Attachment

• May be avoidant and or hypervigilant

• More negative internal working models psychological outcomes

Anxious Attachment:

• Insecure

• Anxious, uncertain and clingy

• WHen caregiver is unreliable

  • Child might be difficult to comfort when scared

Avoidant Attachment

Insecure

Child avoids closeness

Maybe be uncomfortable with emotional intimacy

Caregiver unavailable or abusive

Child learns to distrust caregiver and relationship

How do securely attached babies react when caregiver returns

SMile and looks happy

How do securely Anxious babies react when caregiver returns

Keep crying and are difficult to comfort

How do securely Avoidant babies react when caregiver returns

Look away and refuse to acknowledge

How do avoidant men react in relationships

• less likely to seek physical contact

Anxiously attachmend react in relationships

More likely to be upset when sperated from partners

Attachment anxiety

Degree which one worries that a partner will be unavalibe in times of need

Attachment avoidance

Degree to wich one distrust a partner goodwill

Hyperactivation strategies

Goal: Get parter to provide support/ protection

• Attachment anxiety

Deactivation strategies

Goal: Strive for self reliance

• Attachment avoidance

personality: High in anxious attachment

• High neuroticism

  • Low Conscientiousness

Personality: High avoidance

• Low extraversion, agreeableness, and conscientiousness

Dimensional

Based on scores on two underlying, orthogonal dimension

Dimensional: Attachment anxiety

• Nervousness about relationships

  • Negative internal working models of oneself

Dimensional: Attachment avoidance

• Lack of desire for emotional connection to relationship partners

  • Negative internal wokring model of others

Typology

Basewd on high vs low combination of dimensions:

• Secure

• Preoccupied

• Dismissing

• Fearful

Typology: Secure

• Low anxiety and avoidance

  • Positive views of voth self and others

Typology: Preoccupied

• HIgh anxiety and low avoidance

• Negative views of one self

• positive view of others

Typology: Dismissing

• Low anxiety huggh avoidance

• Positive views of self

• Negativae view of others

Fearful: Typology

• High anxiety and avoidance

  • Negative view of both self and others

PRediction: Secure

More compassion and willingness to help, alturuistic motivation

Prediction: Avoidant

LEss comppasion and willingness to hel, but egoistic motives

Prediction: Anxious

Higher personal distress, less willing to help

Grace: Secure

More likley to give this and extend this

Grace: Anxious

Less of this and higher distress

AVoidant: GRace

Less empathy and extend less of this

What are most people satisfied in their partner

• Stablr

• Kind

  • Duiful

Relationship: HIgh Extraversion

• Good at forming relationships

• More satisfied in relationships

  • Maintain a large number of relationships

High agreeableness: relationship

Positive, satisfyinf relationship

Relationship: High neuroticism

MOre lkely to experience unstable relationships and relationship anxiety

Relationship: Conscientiousness

Experience low conflict as a result of more self control

High openness to experience: Relationship

Incorporates partners ideals

New experience

What is ithe best to have in a relationship

• Attitudes and values

  • Relationships last longer

    • Predicts less conflict

Relationship: Trait similarity

• Research suggest lower maritial satisfaction when its the same personalites

Empathy

• ABility to understand and feel another person experience

  • Positve force in a relationship

Compassion

Feeling emphaty towards people who are suffering and want to remove it

• positive force in a relationship

Self control

• AN aspect of conscientiousness

  • Positive force

Psychopathy

• Unaffected by other suffering

• Low emphaty and impulsivity

  • Negative force in relationship

Machiavellianism

Ignore convetional morality

• Low empathy and exploitative nature

  • Negatice force in a relationship

Narcissim

Low empathy and grandiosity

Dark Triad

• Narcissism, machiavellianism, and psychopathy

  • Game palying approach

Online dating

• Large numbers of partners

• No evidence of better romantic outcomes