COM 102 Module 8: Communication in Relationships

content messages

the words used to communicate

relational messages

expresses how the relationship partners feel toward one another

affinity

the degree to which people like or appreciate each other

immediacy

the degree of interest and attention we feel toward and communicate to others

respect

the social need to be held in esteem by others

control

the social need to influence others

voluntary and personal relationships

partners/spouses, best friends

voluntary social relationships

acquaintances, workout buddy

involuntary and personal relationships

parent-child, siblings, grandparent-grandchild, colleagues

involuntary social relationships

distant relatives, co-workers, neighbors, classmates, teacher-student

pluralistic relationship

high conversation, low conformity

consensual relationship

high conversation, high conformity

laissez-faire relationship

low conversation, low conformity

protective relationship

low conversation, high conformity

intimacy

a state of physical or psychological closeness

initiating

first stage, people size each other up and try to present themselves favorably

experimenting

second stage, people engage in basic exchange of information

intensifying

third stage, intimacy is heightened

integrating

fourth stage, two people’s identities and personalities merge, sense of interdependence develops

bonding

fifth stage, includes a public ritual that announces formal commitment

differentiating

sixth stage, communicating differences becomes a primary focus

circumscribing

seventh stage, communication decreases and certain areas or subjects become restricted as individuals verbally close themselves off from each other

stagnating

eighth stage, relationship may come to a standstill, individuals basically wait for the relationship to end

avoiding

ninth stage, people signal that they want to close down lines of communication

terminating

tenth stage, relationship ends

social exchange theory

weighs the costs and rewards in a given relationship

receptive friendships

include a status differential that makes the relationship asymmetrical

altruistic lies

lies told to build the self-esteem of our relational partner, communicate loyalty, or bend the truth to spare someone from hurtful information

supervisor-subordinate relationship

can be primarily based in mentoring, friendship, or romance and includes two people, one of whom has formal authority over the other

conversation orientation

the degree to which a family encourages members to interact and communicate about various topics

conformity orientation

the degree to which a family communication climate encourages conformity and agreement regarding beliefs, attitudes, values, and behaviors

network overlap

refers to the number of shared associations, including friends and family that a couple has

transactional definitions of family

focus on communication and subjective feelings of connection

reciprocal friendships

are solid interpersonal relationships between people who are equals with a shared sense of loyalty and commitment

theory of triangles

examines relationship between three domains of activity: the primary partnership (corner 1), the inner self (corner 2), and important outside interests (corner 3)

Knapp’s stages of relational interaction

ten established stages of interaction that can help us understand how relationships come together and come apart

violent resistance (VR)

is a type of violence between intimate partners and is often a reaction or response to intimate terrorism (IT)

task-orientation definitions of family

recognize that behaviors like emotional and financial support are more important interpersonal indicators of a family-like connection than biology

passionate love

entails an emotionally charged engagement between two people that can be both exhilarating and painful

intimate terrorism (IT)

when a partner uses violence to have general control over the other

collegial peers

engage in more self-disclosure about work and personal topics and communicate emotional support

structural definitions of family

focus on form, criteria for membership, and often hierarchy of family members

situational couple violence (SCV)

most common type of IPV and does not involve a quest for control in the relationship

associative friendships

mutually pleasurable relationships between acquaintances or associates that, although positive, lack the commitment of reciprocal friendships

special peers

high levels of self-disclosure with relatively few limitations and are highly interdependent in terms of providing emotional and professional support for one another

companionate love

is affection felt between two people whose lives are interdependent

information peers

communicate about work-related topics only, and there is a low level of self-disclosure and trust