psych 1101 module 43 prosocial relations

by studying prosocial behavior

behavior that intends to help or benefit someone

Our positive behaviors toward others are evident from explorations of attraction, altruism, and peacemaking

let’s consider three ingredients of our liking for one another: (psychology of attraction)

proximity, attractiveness, and similarity.

proximity

• geographic nearness—is friendship’s most powerful predictor.

• Can provide provide opportunities for aggression

• Mere exposure effect > the tendency for repeated exposure to novel stimuli to increase our liking of them.

• Familiarity with a face also makes it look happier

•  For our ancestors, this mere exposure effect likely had survival value

• Mere exposure increases our liking not only for familiar faces, but also for familiar musical selections, geometric figures,

• We like other people when their faces incorporate some morphed features of our own.

mere exposure effect

the tendency for repeated exposure to novel stimuli to increase our liking of them.

similarity

• in real life, opposites retract

• Tall people like tall people, share interests

• We also like those who like us.

• reward theory of attraction: We will like those whose behavior is rewarding to us, including those who are both able and willing to help us achieve our goals

physical attractiveness

• But studies show that a man’s looks do affect women’s behavior, women more likely to say that another's looks does not affect them

• predicts how often people date and how popular they feel. And it affects initial impressions of people’s personalities

•  By providing reproductive clues, bodies influence sexual attraction

• .When people rate other-sex faces and bodies separately, the face tends to be the better predictor of overall physical attractiveness

• Our feelings also influence our attractiveness judgment > we are attracted to appealing personality traits

• Our feelings influence our perceptions. Those we like we find attractive.

• As we see our loved ones again and again, their physical imperfections grow less noticeable and their attractiveness grows more apparent

for those who find the importance of looks unfair and unenlightened, three other findings may be reassuring.

• people’s attractiveness is surprisingly unrelated to their self-esteem and happiness

• Unless we have just compared ourselves with superattractive people, few of us (thanks, perhaps, to the mere exposure effect) view ourselves as unattractive Strikingly attractive people are sometimes suspicious that praise for their work may simply be a reaction to their looks. Less attractive people have been more likely to accept praise as sincere

• For couples who were friends before lovers—who became romantically involved long after first meeting—looks matter less  With slow-cooked love, shared values and interests matter more

Once proximity affords us contact, what most affects our first impressions?

physical appearance

romantic love

If love endures, temporary passionate love will mellow into a lingering companionate love

modern matchmaking

• Those who have not found a romantic partner in their immediate proximity may cast a wider net, like dating sites/ dating apps

• How effective is the matchmaking? Compared with those formed in person, internet-formed friendships and romantic relationships are, on average, slightly more likely to last and be satisfying

• When conversing online with someone for 20 minutes, they felt more liking for that person than they did for someone they had met and talked with face-to-face. This was true even when (unknown to them) it was the same person! Internet friendships often feel as real and important as in-person relationships.

• Those who want to meet again can arrange for future contact. For many participants, 4 minutes is enough time to form a feeling about a conversational partner and to register whether the partner likes them > concept of speed dating

• For researchers, speed dating offers a unique opportunity for studying influences on our first impressions of potential romantic partners. Some recent findings:

• People who fear rejection often elicit rejection > feared it least often selected for a follow up date

• Give more options, people make more superficial choices > focus on more easily assessed characteristics when more partners

• Men wish for future contact with more of their speed dates; women tend to be choosier > men stay, women circulate

• Compatibility is hard to predict

passionate love definition

 an aroused state of intense positive absorption in another, usually present at the beginning of a romantic relationship.

passionate love

•  We intensely desire to be with our partner, and seeing our partner stimulates blood flow to a brain region linked to craving and obsession

• two factor theory of emotion

• Adrenaline makes the heart grow fonder. Sexual desire + a growing attachment = passionate love

two factor theory of emotion can help us understand the intense positive absorption of passionate love That theory assumes that

• emotions have two ingredients—physical arousal plus cognitive appraisal.

• arousal from any source can enhance one emotion or another, depending on how we interpret and label the arousal.

companionate love

 the deep affectionate attachment we feel for those with whom our lives are intertwined

equity

 a condition in which people receive from a relationship in proportion to what they give to it

importance extends beyond marriage. Mutually sharing one’s self and possessions, making decisions together, giving and getting emotional support, promoting and caring about each other’s welfare

self disclosure

 the act of revealing intimate aspects of ourselves to others (our likes and dislikes, our dreams and worries, our proud and shameful moments)

In addition to equity and self-disclosure, a third key to enduring love is

positive support

In the mathematics of love, self-disclosing intimacy + mutually supportive equity =

enduring companionate love

companionate love cont

•  the deep affectionate attachment we feel for those with whom our lives are intertwined

• the flood of passion-facilitating hormones (testosterone, dopamine, adrenaline) subsides. But another hormone, oxytocin, remains, supporting feelings of trust, calmness, and bonding with the mate

•  Better, they say, to seek (or have someone seek for you) a partner with a compatible background and interests. Cultures where people rate love as less important for marriage do have lower divorce rates

altruism

unselfish regard for the welfare of others.

example of altruism

Kitty Genovese who was raped, no one intervened

bystander effect

 the tendency for any given bystander to be less likely to give aid if other bystanders are present.

the odds for helping are the highest when

the person appears to need and deserve help.

the person is in some way similar to us.

the person is a woman.

we have just observed someone else being helpful.

we are not in a hurry.

we are in a small town or rural area.

we are feeling guilty.

we are focused on others and not preoccupied.

we are in a good mood.

• The “good mood” result—that happy people are helpful people—is one of psychology’s most consistent findings

• So happiness breeds helpfulness. But it’s also true that helpfulness breeds happiness. Helping those in need activates brain areas associated with reward

bystander intervention

• Although initial reports of the Genovese murder overestimated the number of witnesses, the reports triggered outrage over the bystanders’ apparent “apathy” and “indifference.

• instead attributed their inaction to an important situational factor—the presence of others

• We will help only if the situation enables us first to notice the incident, then to interpret it as an emergency, and finally to assume responsibility for helping

• At each step, the presence of others can turn us away from the path that leads to helping.

• When more people shared responsibility for helping—when there was a diffusion of responsibility—any single listener was less likely to help.

social exchange theory

• the theory that our social behavior is an exchange process, the aim of which is to maximize benefits and minimize costs

• if the rewards exceed the costs, you will help.

• Others believe we help because we have been socialized to do so, through norms that prescribe how we ought to behave

social responsibility norm

• an expectation that people will help those needing their help.

• young children and others who cannot give as much as they receive—even if the costs outweigh the benefits

example of social responsibility norm

• Example of this was during COVID pandemic, going out despite risk of infection

• the highly religious, despite being poorer, were about 50 percent more likely to report having “donated money to a charity in the last month” and to have volunteered time to an organization

reciprocity norm

•  an expectation that people will help, not hurt, those who have helped them

• when people who were treated generously became more likely to be generous to a stranger

types of norms

social responsibility and reciprocity

One widely held view is that self-interest underlies all human interactions, that our constant goal is to

maximize rewards and minimize costs

from conflict to peace

• Positive social norms encourage generosity and enable group living. But conflicts often divide us like global conflict

conflict

 perceived incompatibility of actions, goals, or ideas

elements of conflict

In each situation, conflict may seed positive change, or it may be a destructive process that can produce unwanted results. Among the destructive processes are social traps and distorted perceptions

social traps

•  a situation in which the conflicting parties, by each pursuing their self-interest rather than the good of the group, become caught in mutually destructive behavior

• challenge us to reconcile our right to pursue our personal well being with our responsibility for the well being of all

psychologists have therefore explored ways to convince people to cooperate for their mutual betterment through

agreed-upon regulations, through better communication, and through promoting awareness of our responsibilities toward community, nation, and the whole of humanity

mirror image perceptions

•  mutual views often held by conflicting parties, as when each side sees itself as ethical and peaceful and views the other side as evil and aggressive

•  As we see “them”—as untrustworthy, with evil intentions—so “they” see us, each demonizes each other

• can often feed a vicious cycle of hostility.

• feed similar cycles of hostility on the world stage

•  The point is that enemy perceptions often form mirror images. Moreover, as enemies change, so do perception

self fulfilling prophecies

• a belief that leads to its own fulfillment; beliefs that confirm themselves by influencing the other country to react in ways that seem to justify those beliefs.

• individuals and nations alike tend to see their own actions as responses to provocation, not as the causes of what happens next.

promoting peace

Contact, communication, and conciliationc

contact (part of promoting peace)

• Does it help to put two conflicting parties into close contact? It depends. Negative contact increases disliking

• But positive contact—especially noncompetitive contact between parties of equal status, such as fellow store clerks—typically helps.

• countries with the most immigrants were the most supportive of immigrants; outgroup prejudice was strongest in countries with few immigrants

• straight, cisgender people’s attitudes toward gay and transgender people are influenced not only by what they know but also by whom they know

•  extended contact”—knowing that ingroup friends have outgroup friends—improves attitudes toward the outgroup

• When such mirror-image misperceptions are corrected, friendships may form and prejudices melt.

superordinate goals

shared goals that override differences among people and require their cooperation

cooperation

•  What reduced conflict was not mere contact, but cooperative contact.

• Critics suggest that Sherif’s research team encouraged the conflict, hoping the study would illustrate their expectations about socially toxic competition and socially beneficial cooperation

• children and youth exposed to war or conflict also develop strong social identities

• at such times, cooperation can lead people to define a new, inclusive group that dissolves their former subgroups

• members of multi-ethnic groups who work together on projects typically come to feel friendly toward one another

• As we engage in mutually beneficial trade, as we work to protect our common destiny on this fragile planet, and as we become more aware that our hopes and fears are shared, we can transform misperceptions that feed conflict into feelings of solidarity based on common interests.

• superordinate goals

communication (part of promoting peace)

Mediators help each party voice its viewpoint and understand the other’s needs and goals.

conciliation

• Understanding and cooperative resolution are most needed, yet least likely, in times of anger or crisis

• GRIT

• Small conciliatory gestures alleviate tension

GRIT

• Graduated and Reciprocated Initiatives in Tension-Reduction—a strategy designed to decrease international tensions

•   one side first announces its recognition of mutual interests and its intent to reduce tensions. It then initiates one or more small, conciliatory acts, open reciprocity from other party