Santa's Light Show (ALTERNATE)

(After Santa’s VO)

Fred: Thank you Santa for that wonderful introduction. That’s right we’re the Tinker siblings and it was our job this year to make some big upgrades to Santa’s Light Show. And let me tell you…we’ve been tinker-ing around all year long.

Ed: Oh definitely. I’m Ed, and as the resident tinker thinker here, I came up with all the new ideas. You could say a light bulb went coffin my head. Get it? Light bulb. Lights…Light show…

Fred: Ok, come down there Seinfeld…I’m Fred, and as the head carpenter, I was in charge of building all the structures that you see here on stage.

Ed: And after she made this conglomeration of steel and lights…I had to wire it all together.

Fred: He’s also head electrician…(aside) and he made sure to complain the whole time.

Ed: It’s a LOT of wires.

Fred: Big ideas call for big upgrades!

Ed: And big headaches from little brothers…

Fred: Ok, that’s enough. Now that we’re all here…I think it’s time we flick the switch and get this Holly Jolly Light Show underway…

Ed: Oh yeah!!

Fred: Everyone countdown with us from five and we’ll get the show going. Ready…5…4…3…2…1…

Ed: Hmph. That’s not good.

Fred: (freaking out) Oh my goodness!! What happened?! Why didn’t it work?! We’re RUINED! Better start getting your resumes together bro…cause like a Christmas goose…we’re cooked. DUNZO! WE’RE ALL OUT WITH THE OLD PINE TREES…

Ed: Woah hold on. Don’t rope me into this. This isn’t my fault. You’re the one who dreamed up this over-the-top monstrosity with A LOT of wires. It was…uh…you Fred. You didn’t build all this to my specifications. There are unnecessary changes all through the blueprints.

Fred: Well, I have to take creative liberties. I mean your ideas are sometimes a bit too…what’s the word…sparkly…

Ed: WHAT?!

Fred: Well, Ed, maybe if you weren’t such a peppermint pooper and complaining all the time the wires would be connected properly.

Ed: IT’S A LOT OF WIRES!!!!!

Fred: And I watched you rush through as quickly as possible. I mean, how many sandwich breaks does one person need a day?!

Ed: SEVEN!

Fred: Woah woah woah. Hold up jingle horses. We’re embarrassing ourselves in front of our new friends

Ed: Oh yeah, Let’s keep our family drama where it belongs…in a group text!

Fred: Don’t bring that up. This was OUR effort. So, that means it’s OUR failure. Which also means, WE must solve the problem.

Ed: You’re right. Let’s run a quick diagnostic test and make sure all the places we’re each responsible for are in working order. Hmmm…As I look around, I can see that all the lights are hung with care according to my design.

Fred: And all these structures are built sturdy and sound and in accordance with the Elf Safety Union…SNOWSHA.

Ed: Wait a second. Everything is plugged in correctly, but my “Sparkle Meter” that gets the lights fired up isn’t getting a good read on the power in here.

Fred: Weird. You’re sure that “Sparkle Meter” is working correctly?

Ed: Oh, yeah, it’s working

Fred: Ha. Ha. Hmmm…no sparkle…hmmm…OF COURSE! We forgot the most important thing. Christmas Magic! Nothing happens at Santa’s Village without Christmas Magic.

Ed: We gotta get the spirit in here SPARKLING. Everyone…we need YOUR help. We must believe in the magic of Christmas. Let’s all say “I Believe’ together three times and then we’ll flip that switch again.

Fred: Yeah. Everyone ready?!? I BELIVE! I BELIEVE! I BELIEVE!