roles and relationships between parents and children

has childhood always been the same?

• childhood as a social construct - created by society’s attitudes and the assumptions we make about children in our culture

• sociologists argue - childhood and status of children in society isn’t fixed

• differs in time, places and cultures

• western idea of childhood vs childhood in the past

childhood in medieval times

• aries believed that childhood didn’t exist until the middle ages (modern intervention)

• high infant mortality (50% survival)

• culture of childhood = 1600s

• children were depicted as ‘little adults’

→ had no time for fun - responsibilities at 7/8

• family survival = dependent on child’s income

childhood as a social construct

• phillipe aries - idea of childhood did not exist in the middle ages

• ‘little adults’ - children would take on adult responsibilities at age 7 or 8

• family survival - dependent on children’s income

• high infant morality

• stephen wagg - not one single universal experience of childhood

• while all humans go through the same physical process of ageing, different societies construct or define this process differently

historical differences in childhood

• social status of childhood extends well beyond the physical maturity age in UK

• many sociologists argue, we have extended childhood for longer than most societies in history

Lawrence Stone

• up until 18th century, children were regarded as extra workers to help their parents or to be hired out for wages by poorer families

• in richer families, sons were there to inherit titles and property and daughters to be married off in order to create useful alliances with other powerful families

• it has only been in modern times that the notion that children need to be loved and protected has emerged

american colonial families: industrial girls treated with respect

• Barbara Eheenreich and Deirdre English

• ‘Today, a four year-old who can tia his or her shoes is impressive. in colonial times, four year old girls knitted stockings and mittens and could produce intricate embroidery: at age six they spun wool. a good, industrious little girl was called ‘mrs’ instead of ‘miss’ in appreciation of her contribution to the family economy: she was not, strictly speaking, a child’

canadian arctic: acquiring understanding

• growing up is largely seen as a process of acquiring thought, reason and understanding (known in Inuit as ihuma)

• young children don’t possess these qualities and are easily angered, cry frequently and are incapable of understanding the external difficulties facing the community, such as shortages of food

• because they can’t be reasoned with, and don’t understand, parents treat them with a great deal of tolerance and leniency

• it’s only when they are older and begin to acquire thought that parents attempt to teach them or discipline them

Tonga: closer to insanity than adulthood

• children are regularly beaten by their parents and older siblings

• they are seen as being closer to ‘mad’ people than adults because they lack the highly prized quality of social competence (or poto as the Tongans call it)

• regularly told off for being clumsy and a child who falls over may be laughed at, shouted at, or beaten

• thought of as mischievous: they cry or want to feed simply because they are naughty, and beatings are at their most severe between the ages of three and five when children are seen as particularly wilful

• parents believe that social competence can only be achieved through discipline and physical punishment, and treat their children in ways that have seemed very harsh to outsiders

the beng: arrivals from a spirit world (small ethnic group in west africa)

• assume that very young children know and understand everything that is said to them, in whatever language they are addressed

• believe in a spirit world where children live before they are born and where they know all human languages and understand all cultures

• life in spirit world is very pleasant and the children have many friends there and are often very reluctant to leave it for an earthy family

• when they are born, they remain in contact with this other world for several years, and may decide to return there if they are not properly looked after

• parents treat young children with great care so that they’re not tempted to return, and also with some reverence, because they’re in contact with the spirit world in a way that adults aren’t

the UK: dependency

• child care - it is illegal for a child under 14 to look after another child unsupervised because they’re deemed incompetent and irresponsible

the fulani: working by the age of four

• by the age of four, girls are expected to be able to care for their younger siblings, fetch water and firewood

• by the age of six girls will be pounding grain, producing milk and butter and selling these alongside their mothers in the market

the yanamamo: girls marry earlier than boys

• girls are expected to help their mother from a young age and by the age of 10 will be running a house

• by the age of twelve or thirteen she is probably married and will start to have babies

• boys don’t marry until later than girls and are allowed to play well into their teens

emergence of modern childhood

• modern times and in western societies - children have become separated from the adult world

• specific goods, leisure activities, children aimed clothes

• families have become more child centred - revolve around their needs

• parents make sacrifices for children’s welfare

• fathers actively spending more time with children

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - smaller families

more love, attention and financial resources can be lavished on each individual child

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - shorter working hours

parents, especially fathers, have more time to spend with their children

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - greater affluence

improved living standards and higher wages mean that their is more disposable income to spend on children

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - extension of education

• only became compulsory in 1880s

• before that, many working class children were sent out to work from an early age

• since then, the school leaving age has risen from 10 to 16 and young people are now obliged by law to continue in some kind of education or training until 18

• this extends the period of children being dependent on parents for much longer and also further separates children from the adult world

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - social policy

• successive governments have given even greater emphasis to child welfare

• this can be seen in the range of benefits designed to assist parents in maintaining and caring for children

• can also be seen in greater emphasis on child protection, as is evident in the willingness of social workers to remove children from families where they are abused or neglected

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - children’s rights

• the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child (1989) extended the idea of human rights to suggest that children had specific rights in addition to those of adults

• in the uk, the 1989 and 2004 Children Acts established legal rights for children in the UK

• e.g. in divorce cases, courts must give priority to the needs and wishes of children in making decisions about where they will live and access to each parent

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - child experts

• since 19th century, a range of medical, psychological, and educational experts have put forward scientific theories about how children should be brought up

• children are no longer seen as simply naturally developing into adults, but as having special needs, and parenting is seen as a skill that parents must learn

• parents are increasingly turning to childcare books written by such specialists as well as websites where they can exchange ideas and experiences with other parents

• there are also tv programmes such as supernanny that offer role models and guidance to parents

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - concerns about children

• parents (and society more generally) have become much more concerned about threats to children due to risks of accidents but also because of fears about ‘stranger danger’ and paedophiles

• some sociologists such as Furedi, have argued that this is largely a moral panic encouraged by the media, and that parents fears are largely unsatisfied

• however, one consequence is that children have become more closely supervised by parents and are less likely to have the freedom to play outside without restrictions

• cunningham suggests that the ‘home habitat’ of typical eight year olds has shrunk to 1/9 of its previous size in the last 25 years

reasons for the emerge of modern childhood - children as consumers

• big business has created a consumer market targeted at children

• not only toys and games but also foods, clothes and leisure activities aimed at children have become important

• children play a big role in families spending decisions, using ‘pester power’ to encourage parents to buy them sweets, toys, computer games and mobile phones

• according to an article in the telegraph (2013), parents spend around £460 a year on average on things they do not need after giving in to the pestering of their children

• sweets, snacks and junk food were among the most popular items, with four in ten pestering their parents for treats

power relations between parents and children

• because of such changes, it can be argued that the balance of power between parents and children has shifted

• families have become more democratic not only in relationships between women and men but also in relationships between parents and children

• e.g. children have more right and are given greater protection by the law. children have also become the centre of family life, having more money spent on them than ever before

age patriarchy

• children still financially dependent on parents as they cannot enter full time work until at least 16 and usually do not earn adult wage until even later

• while the law offers rights and protection to children, it also gives parents authority over their children e.g. parents are given the responsibility for ensuring their children attend school

• children still do not receive full adult rights until they are 18 e.g. they cannot vote in elections and the world they inhabit is largely one created by adult over which they have little control

• children can be seen to have more influence over decision making in families, such as in relationships between women to consumer spending. however, many parents make major decisions such as moving house or separating from one another with little reference to their children

• many children also suffer abuse at the hands of family members or other adults

Palmer - toxic childhood

children are being damaged by a diet of junk food, excessive exposure to computer games and a lack of love or disciple from parents forced to work long hours outside the home

Radford - child abuse and neglect in the UK today (2011)

• children can experience a range of forms of abuse, including physical, emotional and sexual abuse, as well as neglect of their basic needs such as adequate food, clothing and warmth

• 1 in 5 children have experienced severe maltreatment

• children abused by parents or carers are almost 3x more likely to also witness family violence

• 1 in 20 children have been sexually abused and 1 in 3 children sexually abused by an adult did not tell anyone at the time

• all types of abuse and neglect are associated with poorer mental health

• strong associations were found between maltreatment, sexual abuse, physical violence and poorer emotional wellbeing, including self-harm and suicidal thoughts