charlottes web script mr arable

Fern: Papa, please don’t kill it. It’s unfair.

Mr. Arable: Fern, I know more about raising a litter of pigs than you do. A weakling makes trouble. Now run along!

Mrs. Arable: Fern! John?

Mr. Arable: Oh… all right. I’ll let you take care of it for a little while.

Avery: What’s going on? What’s Fern doing over there?

Mr. Arable: Your sister has a guest for breakfast, Avery. In fact, for a little while, she’s going to be raising that pig.

Avery: He’s nothing but a runt!

Mr. Arable: Come in the house and eat your breakfast, Avery. The school bus will be along in half an hour.

Avery: Can I have a pig, too, Pop?

Mr. Arable: No. I only distribute pigs to early risers who are trying to rid the world of injustice. Let’s eat.

Wilbur: I chalk it up to good, clean living.

Mr. Arable: Suppertime, Wilbur.

Wilbur: And to good food.

Mr. Arable: Ok, pig, it’s time you graduated to slops. Skim milk, potato skins, leftover sandwiches, and marmalade.

Fern: Oh yes. Please, Papa.

Mr. Arable: That’s not a bad idea, Martha. Come along. We’ll call Uncle Homer.

Lurvy: Another miracle!

Mr. Arable: You’re going to have visitors all over the place today!

Homer: I don’t know where we’ll put them!

Mr. Arable: We can park the vehicles in the field. Avery and I will direct traffic.

Mrs. Arable: Look how big Wilbur’s gotten!

Mr. Arable: You’ll get some extra good ham and bacon, Homer, when it comes time to kill that pig! (Wilbur sways and faints)

Edith: Come on, everybody. Let’s go to the kitchen and celebrate with some fresh apple strudel and iced tea.

Mr. Arable: Sounds good, Edith!

Mrs. Arable: You’ll have to wait until we can go with you.

Mr. Arable: Oh, now Martha. Let’s let the children go off by themselves. The fair only comes once a year! Now run along. But don’t be gone long!

Avery: Come on, Fern!

Mr. Arable: Don’t eat lots of stuff that’s going to make you sick!

Homer: Don’t get overheated!

Mr. Arable: Watch out for pickpockets!

Mrs. Arable: Do you think it’s alright, John?

Mr. Arable: Well, they’ve got to grow up sometime.

Edith: Let me just dry him off. Look he’s asleep!

Mr. Arable: Martha, let’s you and me wander over to the cattle barn and see the Holsteins.

Homer: Let’s go, then!

Mr. Arable: We’ll meet you back here in a little while.

Homer: That’s terrific! Good for you, Lurvy! Look what Lurvy won!

Mr. Arable: Well, congratulations.

Mrs. Arable: I do wonder where Fern is.

Mr. Arable: She’ll be along.

Homer: Sure, Avery. They have night watchmen to look after the animals. Get lots of sleep, Wilbur. The judges come around first thing in the morning.

Mr. Arable: They may even get here before we do.

Avery: (entering) Oh, no. I can’t believe it

Mr. Arable: What is it, Avery?

Announcer: (Voice on Loudspeaker) When you arrive at the livestock area, please go to the section where the pigs are located.

Mr. Arable: It sounds like somebody around here’s going to get another award.