CR 2 article - “I never felt like she was just doing it for the money”: Disabled men’s intimate (gendered) realities of purchasing sexual pleasure and intimacy

Kirsty Liddiard (2014)

Research questions / objectives

1. Why do heterosexual disabled men purchase sex?

2. How does disability influence men's sexual experiences?

3. How does hegemonic masculinity influence these experiences?

4. Does purchasing sex contribute to disabled people's sexual citizenship?

5. Are commercial sexual services equally empowering for everyone?

key finding 1 - Purchasing sex was about more than sexual gratification.

1. Gaining sexual experience and learning sexual skills.

2. Experiencing physical intimacy and affectionate touch.

3. Feeling sexually desirable and masculine.

key finding 2 - Purchasing sex provided opportunities to learn about sexuality and intimacy.

• Experience physical intimacy for the first time.

• Learn about their own sexual capabilities.

• Explore physical touch outside of medical or caregiving situations.

• Develop confidence in their sexual abilities.

key finding 3 - Sexual experiences helped men feel masculine and desirable.

• Feel attractive and desirable.

• Experience themselves as sexual beings.

• Demonstrate sexual experience when interacting with male friends.

key finding 4 - Purchasing sex provided a sense of independence and personal control.

became a way to exercise personal autonomy.

For example, participants described:

• Saving money secretly.

• Hiding financial transactions.

• Arranging transportation and encounters independently.

• Keeping their sexual experiences private.

key finding 5 -Purchasing sex was sometimes easier than traditional dating.

• Inaccessible bars, clubs and social environments.

• Discrimination and negative attitudes towards disabled people.

• Verbal abuse and social rejection.

key finding 6 - Commercial sex allowed men to prioritize their own pleasure.

In traditional relationships, they sometimes worried about:

• Whether their partner was enjoying the experience.

• Whether their physical impairments affected their sexual performance.

• Whether they could satisfy their partner's expectations.

key finding 7 - Women's experiences of purchasing sex were significantly different.

None of the 10 disabled women in the study had purchased sex, compared with 7 of the 16 men.

Traditional heterosexual expectations position:

• Men as sexually active and seeking sexual gratification.

• Women as sexually passive and primarily providing sexual pleasure to men.

Sexual citizenship

The right to sexual expression, pleasure, autonomy and participation in intimate relationships without discrimination

Hegemonic masculinity

Traditional expectations that men should be sexually confident, active, dominant and capable of satisfying women.

Ableism

Social beliefs and structures that privilege non-disabled bodies while marginalizing and discriminating against disabled people.