Merry Murders at Montmarie: Act 1 Scene 1

GWYNNE: Helen, darling, what time is your brother due to arrive?

Sometime before lunch.

GWYNNE: fraulein Ziegler is anxious to see him again. Perhaps we’ll have a wedding at Montmarie!

Im sure Charlie would love it, but I don’t think fraulein Ziegler has time for anything but running the school

GWYNNE: Oooh, he reminds me of that actor, the one that did those vampire films. I do hope your brother will get rid of him. He gives my gooseflesh gooseflesh

He’s been with Montmarie for years

GWYNNE: I find mid-term distressing. Most of the staff gone. Old Fritz forgetting his place. He’s been acting so oddly these past few days. Not like himself at all. What is it exactly your brother does in the States?

T.V. Executive

LILI: Helen, do you recall Mara’s mother?

Who could forget her.

LILI: The Embassy is making inquiries. Can’t seem to locate her. If you see Mara before I do, ask her to come to my office.

Will do.

GWYNNE: My goodness has General Salonta disappeared? How positively…Balkan

Miss Gwynne, could you excuse me for a moment?

GWYNNE: oh! Of course, dear. I’m fatigued. There’s so much I have to attend to. I’m doing the work of three.

You’re a marvel.

GWYNNE: I’d better tell cook there’ll be another for lunch.

Sybil, hurry up!

CHARLIE: boo!

Charlie!!! Why don’t you come to the front door?

CHARLIE: don’t go.

I know when there’s a crowd. Besides, Sybil and I are expecting someone. I’ll be back, and then we can have a long talk. And, Charlie…?

CHARLIE: I’m listening.

Montmarie is such a wonderful place. No smog, no pollution, no nuclear tests.

BELLA: The chocolate is ready, Signorina

Thank you, Bella

MARA: look!

A letter from Harry Sprague to his company in Canada.

MARA: I found it in the snow. Look at the date! He must have dropped it before he came in.

We’d better tear it up!

MARA: the letter said he wanted to cut down more trees.

I wonder how many Harry Sprague cut down before we…

SYBIL: yes, dummy! He’s here!

Im ready!

WAVERLY: of course not.

Balkan’s?

WAVERLY: i mean those female persons…

You mean women?

WAVERLY:-who fail to appreciate the fact that competition with the male of the species is not only unseemly but futile. It’s a man’s world. This may sound old-fashioned and chauvinistic, but I believe it as my father before me believed it.

And, undoubtedly, his father before him.

SYBIL: do you have the list?

Right here

WAVERLY: what?

Recycling. Papers, bottles, cardboard containers. They run them through various machines and we can use them again.

WAVERLY: Im afraid you’ll have to unselect

What do you mean?

WAVERLY: imposible

Will you have a cup of chocolate?

WAVERLY: no offense meant

Do you feel the same about all men?

WAVERLY: all?

I mean- aren’t there some men we could do without?

MARA: drink your chocolate.

Don’t wait for us.

MARA: he will enrich the earth by his absence

Let’s get busy

GIRLS (ab libbing): hurry! It’s miss gwynne. We’ll never get rid of him in time!

Stand him up!

GWYNNE: whats going on in there! Open this door!

All right?

GWYNNE: what is the meaning of this?

Was that you outside, miss Gwynne

GWYNNE: whats the matter with you girls? Now what did I come in here for?

Chocolate

GWYNNE: i want to renew my acquaintance with Shakespeare

Did you know him?