(DISM) WEEK 4-5: GRIEF

Grief

the normal process of reacting to a loss.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

The Five Stages of Grief, often remembered by the acronym DABDA, were introduced in 1969 by Swiss-American psychiatrist named ___________

STAGE 01: DENIAL

● Refusing to believe a probable death will occur.

● You can help others face it by being available for them to talk instead of forcing them to talk about it.

STAGE 02: ANGER

● Once the diagnosis is accepted as true, anger and hostile feelings like the following can occur:

- Anger at God for not allowing them to see their kids grow up

- Anger at the doctors

- Anger at the family

- Try not to take it personally. They have a right to be angry so allow them to express themselves so they can move on in the grieving process.

STAGE 03: BARGAINING

● They dying person may start to negotiate with God i.e. “I’ll live a healthier life,” “I’ll be a nicer person,” “I was angry so let me ask nicely to please let me live.”

● They may negotiate with the doctor by saying, “How can I get more time so I can live in my dream home, and so on.

● There is a deep sense of yearning at this stage to be well again

STAGE 04: DEPRESSION

● When reality sets in about their near death, bargaining turns into depression.

● Fear of the unknown

● Guilt for demanding so much attention and depleting the family income occurs.

● Be available to listen instead of cheering them up, or rambling, repetitive talk.

● Distraction like talk about sports, etc., is good but don’t ignore the situation.

STAGE 05: ACCEPTANCE

● When the dying have enough time and support, they can often move into acceptance.

● There is an inner peace about the upcoming death.

● The dying person will want someone caring, and accepting by their side.

GRIEF

the process of psychological, social & somatic reactions to the perception of loss.

MOURNING

the process of psychological, social & somatic reactions to the perception of loss.

BEREAVEMENT

the state of having suffered a loss.

GRIEVE WORK

the work of dealing with grief, requiring the expenditure of physical and emotional energy.

COMPLICATED GRIEF

1. Delayed or absent grief.

2. Conflicted grief.

3. Chronic grief.

4. Psychiatric disturbances associated with grief.

5. Physical illness associated with grief.

Family (friendship) orientated

The ability to accept loss is at the heart of all skills in healthy family relations.

Relational

Opportunities for resolution, forgiveness, gratitude.

Intergenerational

- How we want to be remembered.

- Legacy work e.g. what are we leaving behind

as a legacy.

- Healthy and effective parenting model.

- Mentorship re: coping skills with children.

- Decreasing fear in future generations.

- Teaching children.

- Learning from children.

- People die, relationships don’t

Psycho Educative

- Anxiety about the unknown.

- What changes to expect.

- > Forewarned is forearmed.

- > Physical & emotional.

- > Changing family dynamics/roles.

Harm Reductive/Preventative

Identifying destructive coping mechanisms. i.e. alcohol/drug use.

Community oriented

Looking at the larger social interaction e.g. in school or workplace.

Active

What we need to do in order to integrate how we are changed?

Narrative

Richly descriptive in elucidating personal meaning - “Tell me what it is you see death or this loss as?”

Supportive

Facilitating the safe containment of emotional space.

Intrapsychic

Facilitating connection to our own deeper wisdom and ability to heal ourselves.

Spiritually Supportive

We are dealing with the unknown, with lifeís mysteries.

AVOIDANCE

Shock, denial, disbelief, confusion, disorganization.

CONFRONTATION

“highly emotional state wherein the grief is most intense and the psychological reactions to loss are felt most acutely.”

REESTABLISHMENT

“gradual decline of the grief and marks the beginning of an emotional and social reentry back into the everyday world”

CHRONIC GRIEF

One that is prolonged, is excessive in duration, and never comes to a satisfactory conclusion.

DELAYED GRIEF

Emotion that has been “inhibited, suppressed, or postponed.” A subsequent loss may elicit an exaggerated reaction because the bereaved is grieving for two losses.

EXAGGERATED GRIEF

Occurs when feelings of fear, hopelessness, depression, or other symptoms become so excessive that they interfere with the daily existence of the bereaved.

MASKED GRIEF

Symptoms and behaviors experienced by a person who does not recognize the fact that these are related to a loss.