The Dark Side of Interpersonal comm

The Dark Side

An integrative metaphor for a certain perspective toward the study of human folly, frailty, and fallibility
All the ugliness of interpersonal communication
Destructive communication

Destructive Communication

(Communication that hurts a relationship)
Includes, but is not limited to:
Verbal aggression
Deception
Psychological abuse
Bullying
Infidelity

Romantic jealousy

- When an individual worries that a rival could interfere with the existence or quality of her/his relationship

Jealous emotions

-Fear and Anger are most central
-Other jealous emotions include:
- Sadness
- Guilt
- Envy
- Sexual Arousal and Attraction
- Some positive affect such as Love and Appreciation

Jealous Response scores

Surveillance: 3.5714285714285716
Rival Contact: 3.3333333333333335
Rival Derogation: 4.4
Signs of Possession: 7
Negative Communication: 4.25
Counter-jealousy induction: 1.6666666666666667
Violent Communication: 1
Compensatory Restoration: 5
Integrative Communication: 7
Silence: 2.3333333333333335
Denial: 1

Why do we lie?

- Harm Others
- Protect Self
- Spare others

Deception in Relationships

Can help avoid arguments and hurt feelings
Dishonest - less satisfaction and commitment
Leading cause of conflict and breakups

Deception Detection in relationships

Deception detection accuracy is generally low

Advantages of Relational Closeness

-behavioral familiarity
-informational familiarity

Disadvantages of Relational Closeness

-the truth bias
-behavioral control

Relational Transgressions

sexual activity
wanting or actually dating others
deception about something significant
Hurtful messages (words that elicit psychological pain) are also relational transgressions

How do apologies impact relationships

An apology implies acknowledgement of wrongdoing
- expression of responsibility
- Conveyance of remorse
- Direct requests for forgiveness
- Commitment to avoid repeated occurrences of the same behavior

Relational transgressions

Violation of implicit or explicit relationship rules
(Sexual Activity, Wanting others, Deception

Different types of hurtful messages

Words that ellicit psychological pain

relational aggression

verbal aggression