AVOID THESE

• Throughout history

  • We could only see about 5,000 in recorded history and in that 5,000 years A LOT has changed and re-change and re-change, so it doesn’t make sense for you to make the assumption of the 5,000 years stays the same

  • EX: Throughout history, the people of Vietnam have always the fear of war and nuclear weapons. (well, guess what, backkkk in 5000 years there isn’t even a nuclear weapon, so it doesn’t make sense for you to use it)

  • It makes an assumption about how people how behave now, and how people behaved in the past. People have different beliefs and different perspectives.

  • If so, then it won’t be called history.

  • YOU could say, in the post-war era or in the late 20th century

• It was inevitable

  • It was unavoidable

  • Think about history if anything would’ve happened and NO ONE could change anything

  • EX: An apple is falling down and what if you catch it? its no longer the “inevitable”

  • Choice works too, choice matters

  • in the USS Maine, the US chose to believe in Yellow Journalism and started a war with Spain over choosing to stop and evaluate the situation. The choice is there. It just doesn’t magically happen.

• and that’s why [blah country] is so great today

  • temptation for this phrase

  • Gotta be CAREFUL using this it would work in some cases but not all

  • Is the most relevant to end the essay?

  • Ending essays in historical essays need to be specific so they could SUM up the whole thing

  • What great are you meaning? Cultural great? Economic great?

What can you do?

• BE SPECIFIC

• EMPHASIZE CHOICES

• END WITH A RELEVANT CONCLUSION

  • Don’t introduce new info in your conclusion