Need to belong: A fundemental human motive (Chapter 9)

Kassin, S., Fein, S., & Markus, H. R. (2021). Social Psychology (11th ed.). Cengage.

Attraction

• Why are we so attracted to some people but not other people?
• What determines how our intimate relationships evolve over time?
• What does it mean to love someone and what problems are likely to arise along the way

Need to belong

• A basic human motive
• We as people care what others think of us
• People who have close social ties tend to be: happier, healthier, and more satisfied with life

Thrill of Affiliation

• There is a need for affiliation.
  • A desire to make and keep interpersonal relationships
• People differ in the strength of their need for affiliation
• Stress makes the need for affiliation more needed
• Being alone and feeling lonely
  • This motivates people of all

The Agony of Loneliness

• People seek out the company of others (even strangers) in times of stress
• Loneliness: a feeling of deprivation about existing social relations (Kassin, S., Fein, S., & Markus, H. R. (2021). Social Psychology (11th ed.). Cengage.)
• Being shy DOES contribute to social isolation
• There are many different ways to cope with being lonely
• Three factors of loneliness
  • Intimate, relational, and collective

Initial attraction

• We are attracted to others with whom a relationship is directly or indirectly rewarding.
• All humans exhibit patterns of attraction and mate selection that favor the conception, birth, and survival of their offspring.
  • Evolutionary perspective
• The way that people meet has transformed in an explosive way as a result of online dating services such as Match.