close rel wk 1-3 (class)
Hindsight bias: seems obvious after being told (I already knew that)
Does marriage make people happy?
Married people tend to be happier with their lives than single people
Found true across the world
Being married (in an economic view) is the same as receiving $100,000 extra a year
The happiest people reported having good relationships
Why do marriages make people happy?
Gives people protection
Financial
Help cope with bad things
Reduces risk behavior
Hand holding study
Faced with possible shock, people held hands with partner (happy relationship) were calmer
This was tested with people holding no ones hand, spouses hand, and strangers hand
Those who held their spouses hand were less stressed (who were happy with their partners)
People are happiest in marriages when theyre in a new relationship
Need to belong
Weve made it so far and have been thriving by sticking together in groups
Have the need to feel like were belonging - the need is fulfilled when you have enjoyable experiences with others in the context of relationships where you care about each other
Loneliness effected the flu shots (black was most effective and scored lowest on loneliness)
Social exclusion and mortality
Mortality: probability someone will die during study
Having poor social relationships/absence are more likely to die because of it, more than smoking, drinking, flu etc
Social exclusion and attention
How they have one group feeling lonely: told a specialist was testing them, taking questions and determining their future reality. The patients were either told you will have good relationships, bad relationships, misfortunate (health)
Wanted to test is someone was abe to see someone smiling quickly and those in the rejection group found the smiling person very quickly
Lonely people are more likely to scan for people who will make them feel included
Social exclusion and health
We are weak creatures with very few natural defenses.
How do we survive?: by sticking together
The need to belong
Humans have a fundamental need to belong
We are motivated to make connections with others in the same way were motivated to eat, drink and sleep
This need is met when we have enjoyable interactions with other people in relationships that involve mutual concern
Consequence of exclusion
When needs arent met, can have similar psychological and physiological effects as when we fail to meet other needs
Psychological consequences
People who report being socially isolated or lonely tend to report feeling more depressed
Also report being in poorer health and sleeping more poorly
Social exclusion and health
Social exclusion/loneliness has many long term health consequences
Poorer self reported health
Increased risk of heart attack
Poor blood pressure regulation
Poor sleep
Poorer cardiovascular function
Poorer immune funcitioning
EXPERIMENT
83 college freshmen. Loneliness measured using UCLA scale. Were given a flu shot. Measured vaccine antibody via blood darws month 1 and 4 months post vaccination.
Loneliness effected the flu shots (black was most effective and scored lowest on loneliness)
Th more lonely someone was the less effective the flu shot was
Social exclusion and mortality
Holt-Lunstad and colleagues examined the published research and conducted a metaanalysis
Being lonely in social relationships were more severe in causing death than other factors including smoking, drinking, flu, heart disease etc
Types of social exclusion
Rejection - when a person or group doesn’t want to have a relationship with another person
Directly (turning down a date) or indirectly (speaking bad about)
Ostracism - when people feel ignored by others
Reactions to social exclusion
When people feel socially excluded, they think and behave in ways that try to maintain social bonds
Cognitive reactions to exclusion
Exclusion leads people to pay close attention for signs and signals of inclusion
Socially excluded others
Better at detecting facoal expressions
Can detect fake smiles from real
Faster to focus their attention on where other people are looking
Judge others by physically closer to them
Social exclusion and attention
EXPERIMENT
69 undergrades were told to give some responses. To expert and this expert will come back with the most likely thing to happen in your future
Future belonging : was told theyd have a long life of amazing connections
Future alone: was told by 30 you will be alone, die alone essentially.
Misfortune control: told that horrible things would happen to them (health wise)
Tested to see a mans sad face and then participation were told to find his face again amongst a bunch of different faces (this time he was smiling)
It was found that the future alone people were very quick to find him (smiling) because lonely people tend to look for people who will include them
Behavioural reactions to social exclusion
Report strong desire to make new friends
Behave generously to potential friends
More motivated to work with others
Social exclusion and prosocial behavior (experiment)
Does social exclusion make people nicer to others?
Gave participants future alone manipulation
Experiement 1: everyone was placed in those groups as well (FUTURE alone, belonging, misfortune)
Everyone received 2 dollars in quarters and were told that they are also collecting money for student emergency fund
Future alone people barely gave any money. Those in the group of future belonging and misfortune gave almost or everything ($2)
Experiment 3
Same thing with all 3 groups. Someone dropped 20 pencils and the experiment was to see is the group in the lonely future would try to make connection and help by picking them up.
They were the group who picked up 1 or none. The other 2 picked up half of the pencils
People in the future alone condition:
Donated less money
Were less likely to help
Social exclusion and prosocial behavior
People are only motivated to behave in a friendly and prosocial way when they expect to interact with the other person again
If not, people tend to respond with hostility, anger, and aggression
We only are friendly to those who we believe we will see again (if youre lonely and are socially excluded)
Hot sauce study
Cyberball; give participants cover story and asked to play an online game
Game where you toss thr ball and then must receive the ball with the 2 other people
They believe there are 2 other people playing but in reality its just a program (scripted)
One condition everyone passes the ball
In the other the live player is excluded and player 2 and 3 start playing with eachother
In this study they did similar thing with cyberball but made it real. they pass the ball around to eachother, same thing with the inclusion and exclusion condition
Participants were eld to believe they were participants with 2 other students
In one condition, participants were included in ball toss game
In exclusion condition, confederates played with each other will ignoring the participant
They then were asked to help experiments with an unrelated "taste preferences experiment"
Dependent variable: amount of hot sauce they prepared for future "tasters" (were told these tasters disliked spicy and they would sample the entire amount)
The ostracised group gave them much more hot sauce then the included group
Behavioural consequences of social exclusion
Rejection and social exclusion are often cited as justification for aggressive or violent behaviour
Not always directed at the "perpetrator" - just was taken out on random people (who they felt like they wouldn’t see again
History of rejection cited as key contributor for school shootings
Being accepted by at least one other person can greatly minimize the likelihood of displaced aggression
Emotional reactions to social exclusion
People often describe negative emotions using language that implies physical injury
My feelings were hurt
It felt like being punched in the gut
My heart was ripped out
Slap in the face
Exclusion and social pain
The body might sue the same system that is sues to respond to physical injury to respond to physical pain
Same physiological and neural mechanisms
This is more than metaphor
Experiemnt
Used the same "future alone" manipulation described earlier
DV: pain threshold and tolerance
Finger pressure administered by algometer
Excluded participants reported higher pain thresholds and tolerance → they could withstand more physical pain.
Social exclusion appeared to numb sensitivity to physical pain(emotional pain dulling physical pain).
Tylenol study
Experiment
Participants surveyed over 3 weeks and asked to take 1 pill in morning and 1 before ebd
2 conditions: acetominiphen (tylenol) or placebp
Everyday participants reported on their social pain
Participants were randomly assigned to take either Tylenol or a placebodaily for three weeks.
They reported their social pain levels each day (feelings of rejection, hurt, exclusion).
The placebo group had an average level of social pain with the exclusion they were experiencing was not changed. Those in the tyenol group reported having less pain
Loneliness
Loneliness defined as peoples subjective perceptions their social needs arent being met
More longer-lasting than feeling rejected or ostracized
Those who report feeling very lonely think and behave differently from those who feel socially excluded
High alert for social threat, rather than acceptance
Quick to identify sad or angry emotional expressions In other faces
Lonely people more readily notice signs of rejection and see angry faces in the crowd
Expect others to dislike and reject them
Loneliness and biased thought
Students completed a loneliness scale
132 women, 76 men participated in groups of 4 same sex members
3 discussions tasks, each 10 minutes
Completed post-task rating of
Themselves, the other group members, predicted how others viewed them
Experiment
Lonely people may have overly negative views of their social skills
Yet other students show that people find lonely people less warm, less confident, shy, unassertive, socially awkward and aloof
Correlations with loneliness score
Lonely people tend to see everyone else as more intelligent and more attractive than themselves
They estimate that others see them horribly, socially awkward, unlikeable, closed off, unattractive, unfriendly, follower
A paradox
Although they desire inclusion, lonely people fear rejection, and so they can be
Very cautious on social interactions
Passive within social interactions
Avoidant of social interactions
What influences attraction and why
Basic principles
Similarity
Demographics
Age, ethnicity, culture, religion, race, education, IQ
Personality
Shared emotional experience
Values & attitudes
Newcombs study on the "experimental dorm"
Experiment
Asked 1st years questions and measured attitudes on a number of characteristics
They found that attitdues that were more similar were more likely o become friends vs those who were distant
Measured attitudes prior to arriving (sex, family, politics)
Greater liking with similar attitudes
Experiment
Similarity & attraction
Participants asked to give opinions on 26 different topic. They took 2 conditions and group 1 was shwon a fake survey where the answers were very similar, and group 2 where it was very dissimilar
People who were perceived to have similar opinions they were more attracted to them
Feel validated in our beliefs & attitudes
More confident they will like us in return
BELIEVING WERE SIMILAR TO ANOTHER PERSON IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ACTUAL SIMILARITY
Familiarity
Being familiar (maybe same hometown, job, etc)
Experiment
People were asked to attend a class, one student was 0, 5, 10, and 15 and th class was asked to rate the attractiveness of these 4 people. The people who showed up more were more familiar to the group and was led to be rated more attractive
Reciprocity
People like those who like them in return
Experiment
270 astudents and moved them to an appartment and were asked to name 3 closest friends from that building. 65% of friends mentioned were from same building
Experiment
Pairs of students told that person B either likes them or dislikes them,
If person a was told person b likes them , they also like them in return, and the opposite
And the other person (the one that supposedly has liked or disliked the other one - not true) if perosn a was told perosn b likes you, person b has a good time with person a. if person a is told person b doesn’t like them, person b has a bad time as well.
Why is it so attractive?
The need to belong
The pain of rejection
Men only choose to sit with attractive confederate when there is an excuse
Avoid rejection
Experiment
33 men walked in and there was 2 tv monitors, one of them had an attractive women in front of it
One screen was a slapstick comedy and other one was dark comedy.
Were told one vidoe machine was broken and so theyre showing the same movie on both monitors. Other half of partiicpants were given the choice and were told they can choose where they want to sit
The men who were told it doesn’t matter where you sit the tv screens are showing the exact same thing, they mostly sat beside themselves
When theyre told each tv was showing a different movie and you can choose, most of them chose to sat next to the attractive women
Desirability = physical attraction + probability of acceptance (both need to be moderate in order to approach)
What opening lines are effective
To women: demonstrating personal qualities and cultural competence
To men: showing interest
Playing hard to get
Mixed messages: does playing "hard to get" work?
Youre most appealing to someone when you show interest in them and no one else
Men liked uniformly hard-to-get or uniformly east-to-get women less than one who showed interest in them
Uncertainty about someones feelings towards you can increase your attraction to them
Keeping people guessing might heighten attraction
Ecpeirment
Speed dating study. Hypothesis: reciprocity is good but not if the person likes everyone else too. Peopled don’t find theselves attractive to peole who don’t find anyone attractive, same if they like everyone.
Physical attractiveness
Infants
2 month old infants look longer at attractive faces
Infants interact more with attractive strangers
Children
Attractive pre-schoolers more popular
Attractive children liked more by teachers
Get better grades
Adults
More popular
Better success in dating
Do better in school
Get paid more
Attain prestigious occupations
Receive more help
Fare better in court
Everyone desires an attractive partner but people often settle for what they can get. In a study peple were instructed to
Why?
Evolutionary explanation
Beauty signals health/good genes
Stereotype: what is beautiful is good
Attractive people judged to be more sensitive, kind, interesting, strong, poised, modest, sociable, outgoing, exciting, sophisticated and sexually warm
Stereotype effect holds across cultures, but changes in context of stereotype
Collectivist cultures see attractive people as higher in integrity and more concerned about others
History of positive interactions
Is the stereotype true
Physical attractiveness: why?
Evolutionary explanation
Beauty signals health/good genes
Stereotype: what is beautiful is good
Attractive people judged to be more sensiitve, kind, interesting, strong, poised, etc
Experiments
Are beautiful people really so great?
Dance and they were told you would be paired with someone similar to you. Those who were paired with attractive people really liked their date, if the other person was okay they liked them a little and if they were unattractive, they didn’t like them
Pairs of men and women interact over phone and physical attractiveness was manipulated by showing men a false picture of the women (1/2 attractive and 1/2 unattractive)
Fake attractive photo condition: women were rated as more friendly and sociable
Fake-unattractive photo condition: women were rated cold and boring
Behavioural confirmation (self-fulfilling prophecy)
environmental factors
Motivation
Ovulation
Why does proximity breed attraction
Interaction
More opportunity to discover commonalities and exchange rewards
Mere exposure (familiarity)
Novel stimuli liked more after repeated exposure
What is attractive
Faces
Sex typed features
Facial symmetry & averageness
Bodies
Waist to hip ratio
Sex-typed preferences
What is considered attractive?
For men: prominent eyebrow ridges, broad jaw
For all: larger eyes, smaller noses, prominent cheekbones, large smile
For women: smaller chin
Symmetry
People rate symmetrical faces as more attractive than more asymmetrical faces
In studies examining real photographs
We like faces who weve seen more (familiarity)
Things we can control:
Women:
men tend to rate women with makeup as more attractive (especially when professionally applied)
Small compared to other factors
Men:
Women see bearded men as more masculine, but not more attractive
Women preferred men with heavy stubble (10 days growth) most attractive vs freshly shaved or full beards
Bodies
Waist to hip ratio
It was shown that men like owmen who are average weight with small waist (0.7). This was shown because this is optimal in giving birth (subcosncious)
It was shown that women like men with an average weight man weight same hip to waist ratio. Women don’t like men with smaller waist and big hips, because theyre too feminine
Waist to hit ratio
Body weight
Swami body weight preferences across 26 countries
Asked women what is your preferred body type and asked men what would your ideal partner body type be?
People chose around 3.5 all around the world
Environmental factors short answer question
Time of the day (motivation)
Women were asked to approach men at the bar at 3 points during the night, the men were asked to rate the attractievness of women around them on average. They wanted to know if the rate would change across time - asked between 9, 10:30 and 12. for men, the women at the bar get really good looking at 12pm
Mens judgements are being affected by their motivation - as closing time, men are realizing that their opportunities to find someone to hook up are fading because the bar is closing. Even if ypu take out the role of alcohol , the effect is the same.
They were also asked on average how attractive were the men - ratings of other men barely change
This affect only occurs to people who are single
Time of the month (ovulation)
Intercourse is necessary but not sufficient for reproduction (must be timed right)
In order to become pregannt, you have to have sex at a time when a women is ovulating
If a women has sex in the first couple of days there is 0% of becoming pregnant
If a women has sex peak ovulation, the porbability is very high
As it goes on less likely to become pregnant
Evolutionary psychology: people possess "adaptations" designed to promote mating behavior and ensure successful reproduction
Womens mating preferences change across their menstrual cycle as a function of fertility
Promote mating with partners of good genetic "fitness"
Women want to have sex with men with good genes especially around her ovulation
At other times they don’t care as much about good genes
Study - smelly shirt study
Recruted men - wear 2 days, no shower with scent, so spicy food, no sex, no cuddling (sleep alone), no alcohol, no smoking, no drugs. After the t shrit was returned in a plastic bag before giving it back, they measured their bodies (how symmetrical, left bicep vs right bicep all over body) they wanted to figure out how symmetrical their bodies are (symemtry of a male body is associated with reproductive success)
They invite females, they ask the females to open and smell the bag and tell us how pleasant and sexy it is. They ask women if theyre on birth control, and if not when was last period. They want to know where they are at in their menstrual cycle.
For nonovulating women : no correlation between mens body symmetry and womens ratings
Ovulating women found symmatrical men sexier (rated higher than fresh shirts
Ovulatory shift
Womens "mate preferences" should change to favor men with good genes at times when theyre nearer ovulation
What are good genes?
Cues that indicate masculinity
Cues that indicate attractiveness
Controversial: not always informed by genetics
Fertility
On high fertility days, women prefer
Dominant men
Masculine men
Men with deeper voices
More masucline men
Only for women not on hormonal brith control
Predominantly for short-term mates
Genetically fit men are in high demand
Such men may not be the safest long-term partners
This shift in ovulation (wanitng more masculine men with good genes) still happen with women in relationships
Not just single women
Even In committed relationships
Women with asymmetrical partners become more interested in "extra-pair" men when theyre ovulating
Women with sexier male partners are more satisfied with their relationships on high-fertility days
Women with less sexually desirable partners are more critical of them
Women are more liekly to initiate and have more sex with partners as ovulation nears
Study of how ovulation affects women
88 normally ovulating females (not on brithcontrol) undergraduates invited to the lab twice
Arrived at lab and completed a LH (lutinizing hormone) test to determine ovulation
Came back a secont time when they were no longer ovulating
Completed measure of sexual desirability
"compared with most women, how attractive is your body to men?" "comapred to most women, how sexy would men say you are"
They ask women to indicate what theyd wear to a party by drawing your outfit
Drawings were calculated by how much skin was revealed and asked to judge how revealing and how sexy the outfit is
When women are ovulating they wear more revealing outfits, they do this because they feel sexy and the clothing are most likely to attract men with good genes
They took temeprature as well - this si not physiological, entirely psychological
Women feel more desirable on high fertility days
Also prefer more revealing clothing
Womens seld-presentation
Ovulating women:
Have higher pitched voices
Dress in more revealing clothing
Feel sexier
More motivated to attend social gatherings
Exercise more & eat less
Compete more with other women
Men
Men rate ovulating women as more attractive than non-ovulating women
Not just faces, but scents and voices
Were given phtoos of women during ovulation vs not and men found woemn more atrractive when ovulaitng. Men find womens voices more attractive when ovulating.
Show more "mate-guarding" behaviors when partners are ovulating
Posessiveness and monopolizing their time
Tip strippers more
Make riskier decisions
Changes to ovulatory shift
Many people challenge ovulatory shift hypothesis on methodological grounds
Studies that confirm ovulation with hormonal tests show weaker evidence than studies that estimate fertility from recalled date of menstrual onset
More controlled studies show stronger evidence for some effects than others
They said you have to give lutinzing hromone to see if the women is actually ovulating
Ovulatory shift
Strong evidence for
Women show greater sexual desire for extra-pair mates during ovulation
They are attractive to fit men with good genes, if their partner isnt they are more likely to fantasize about a different partner
More likely to initiate and have intercourse with romantic partners
Feel more desirable
Good genes may not matter as much as we think
Cultural conditions
study
The economy and attraction
Factors outside of our awareness can affect our perception on who is attractive
Variability in the strength of the economy is associated with
The physical feautures, tendency to enhance our attractiveness, mens attitudes towards "economic redistribution"
Environmental security hypothesis
When conditions are threatening or uncertain, people prefer faces with more mature faces
Calculated 'general hard times meaure' for us each year from 1960-2000 - looked at economic conditions, if us engaged in any conflicts
Correlated with characteristics for "playmate of the year"
When they looked at faces, during difficult years the playmates had less surface area in their eyes, more narrow, smaller eyes. When times were tough playmates were older. They had narrow hips, were taller, heavier
The lipstick effect
During economic declines, preference for "luxury items" decreases
However, women tend to spend more on beauty products when the economy is bad
Assessed with non-experiemntal data (the correlation between unemployment and sales) and experimental data
Study
Made women feel bad about the economy, after being told this they offered appliances to women (groceires, handbags, clothing, makeup)
They found that when women are worried about a recession they spend less money on everything else but they increase their spending on products that are designed to enhance attractiveness (makeup, and clothes)
Why does it occur?
Women in hard times want to attract wealthier mates
This affect occurs among wealthy and unwealthy women. This is universal and not rational.
How does the economy affect males attitudes toward economic redistribution