Avoiding Informal Language and Redundancy Part 2

AVOIDING INFORMAL LANGUAGE IN ACADEMIC WRITING

• Author: Miss A. Timbe, John Jay College, Centre for English Language Support (2007)

1. Introduction

• Academic writing requires careful consideration of ideas.

• Informal writing can lead to misconceptions about the seriousness of ideas.

• Editing for informal language is crucial for academic integrity.

2. Informal Language

2.1 Generalizations

• Examples:

  • "Criminals are dangerous."

  • "Americans are overweight."

2.2 Vague Language

• Examples:

  • "School is a big thing in my life."

  • "They arrested some people at the march."

  • "Drinking while driving is bad."

2.3 Use of "You"

• Using "you" may lead to ambiguity:

  • Example: "When you work with a patient who is very ill, you need to be patient."

3. More Formal Language

• Be more specific:

  • "Violent criminals can be dangerous."

  • "Two-thirds of Americans are overweight."

• Use specific terms:

  • "School is an important part of my life."

  • "They arrested some protesters at the march."

• Replace "you" with specific groups:

  • "When nurses work with a patient who is very ill, they need to be patient."

4. Instances of Informal Language

4.1 Informal Words and Expressions

• Examples:

  • "My aunt has a lot of kids."

  • "The criminal justice system is messed up."

4.2 Phrasal Verbs

• Informal Example: "I looked up information about nursing positions."

• More Formal: "I researched information about nursing positions."

4.3 Contractions

• Example: "Many patients don’t listen to their doctors."

• More Formal: "Many patients do not listen to their doctors."

4.4 Incomplete Sentences

• Example: "I chose to attend a CUNY college. Because it is near my home."

• More Formal: "I chose to attend a CUNY college because it is near my home."

5. Exercise

• Exercise 1: Identify informal language in a paragraph about the death penalty. Revise to enhance formality.

• Example: "Some people don’t think that the death penalty is humane..."

6. Identifying Informal Language

• Generalizations, vague language, and informal expressions should be revised to achieve formality:

  • Use specific language and strong verbs.

7. Use Formal Vocabulary

• Casual words may not suit academic essays:

  • Example Revision:

    • Informal: "A couple of researchers have found out that..."

    • Formal: "Several researchers have discovered that..."

8. Choose Strong Verbs

• Prefer strong verbs over phrasal verbs:

  • Example:

    • Informal: "The veteran researcher has churned out many articles."

    • Formal: "The veteran researcher has produced many articles."

9. Avoiding Redundancy

9.1 Defining Redundancy

• Refers to repeating points or phrases unnecessarily.

9.2 Examples of Redundant Language

• Example: "Remember to pack the necessary essentials" → "Remember to pack the essentials."

• Example: "Many uneducated people who have never attended school..." → "Many uneducated people..."

9.3 Common Redundant Phrases

• Phrases like "let me add/suggest" or "it should be noted" are more suitable for speeches.

9.4 Redundant Variants

• Avoid redundant degrees of comparison: "More preferable" and "Most unique" are incorrect due to the meanings of 'preferable' and 'unique.'

9.5 Preposition Redundancies

• Examples of unnecessary prepositions:

  • Comprise of, emphasize on, stress upon

10. Conclusion

• Academic papers should have clear, concise points supporting your argument.

• Avoid repetitive writing to enhance clarity.

• Focus on effective communication over length.