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Chapter 11: Affiliation and Love

Chapter 11: Affiliation and Love

Chapter Outline

  • The Nature of Affiliation and Love

  • Contextual Factors

  • Who is Attractive?

  • Evolutionary Perspective on Mate Attraction

  • What is Love?

  • Relationship Satisfaction

  • Final Thoughts: Does Facebook Make You Lonely?

What is a Relationship?

  • Definition:

    • A relationship exists between two individuals when they influence one another.

    • A relationship is considered close when the influence is strong, frequent, enduring, and interdependent.

The Nature of Affiliation & Love

  • Need for Affiliation: The desire to interact with others.

  • Need to Belong: The desire to form and maintain close, durable relationships.

    • Affiliating helps achieve goals and avoid negative outcomes from social rejection/ isolation.

  • Social Rewards Associated with Affiliation:

    • Presence of others can enhance mood.

    • Achieves positive attention and praise.

    • Provides emotional support, reducing anxiety and fear.

    • Facilitates social comparison.

  • Reinforcement-Affect Model:

    • Preference for interactions with emotionally rewarding individuals; gravitating towards those linked to positive experiences.

  • Social Exchange Theory:

    • Views interactions in terms of tradeoffs, seeking to maximize gains and minimize losses.

    • Applies to both material and non-material rewards.

  • Hatfield’s Equity Theory:

    • Individuals prefer relationships where the benefit-cost ratio is balanced for both partners:

    • Communal Relationships: Concerned about others' welfare, give without expecting return.

    • Exchange Relationships: Based on reciprocal exchange of benefits.

Contextual Factors

  • Liking:

    • We tend to ingratiate ourselves to those who reciprocate our affection.

  • Proximity:

    • People like and develop friendships with those who are geographically close.

  • Familiarity:

    • The Mere Exposure Effect indicates that repeated exposure breeds liking.

  • Similarity:

    • Homophily: Preference for those similar to us.

    • Matching Hypothesis: Couples often pair with similar levels of attractiveness.

Components of Attractiveness

  • Physical Preferences:

    • Symmetrical faces are deemed more attractive.

    • Gender Differences:

    • Females prefer males with features indicating health and vitality.

    • Males are attracted to women displaying signs of health, youth, and reproductive capability.

    • Averaged faces are generally perceived as more attractive.

Perceived and Actual Benefits of Physical Attractiveness

  • Stereotypes:

    • Attractive individuals are presumed to have more positive traits.

  • Actual Benefits:

    • Attractive individuals experience greater popularity, job opportunities, and overall favorable outcomes.

Evolutionary Perspective on Mate Selection

  • Sexual Selection:

    • Evolution through reproductive advantages.

    • Intrasexual Competition: Competition among same-sex individuals for mates.

    • Intersexual Selection: Choosing partners based on specific traits.

  • Differential Parental Investment:

    • The sex investing more in offspring being more selective in partners, while the less invested engages in competition.

  • Mate Preferences:

    • Females seek males with status, resources, and ambition.

    • Males seek females who are fertile and healthy.

Social Role Theory

  • Explains gender differences in mate preferences based on social and biological factors.

  • Women: Seek dominant males capable of providing.

  • Men: Favor females fulfilling caregiving roles.

Variability in Mate Preferences

  • Preferences can vary across time and context based on individual circumstances and life stages.

Sexual Selectivity & Sexual Behavior

  • Differences in Preferences:

    • Males tend to prefer more partners and casual sex compared to females.

    • Males express higher desires for future partners.

  • Error Management Theory:

    • Cognitive biases evolved to address sex-based adaptive issues.

Romantic Jealousy

  • Definition:

    • Psychological arousal due to threats of infidelity.

    • Acts as a form of mate guarding.

  • Gender Differences in Jealousy:

    • Men experience jealousy related to paternity uncertainty; women fear loss of investment.

What is Love?

  • Passionate Love: Intense longing characterized by physiological arousal.

  • Companionate Love: Affection and intimacy in stable relationships.

  • Triangular Theory of Love:

    • Composed of Passion, Intimacy, and Commitment leading to various love types.

Two-Factor Theory of Emotion

  • Emotional experience arises from physiological arousal and cognitive labeling.

  • Studies:

    • Schachter & Singer's experiments and Capilano Bridge study.

Love on the Brain

  • Brain Systems Linked to Love:

    • Attraction/Romantic Love, Lust/Sex Drive, and Attachment.

    • fMRI studies show differential brain activation in response to romantic partners.

Same-Sex Attraction

  • Evolving Understanding:

  • Erotic Plasticity: Variation in sexual desires over a lifetime.

  • Exotic Becomes Erotic Theory: Suggests same-sex attraction emerges under certain circumstances.

Attachment Style

  • Patterns of Behavior in Relationships: Vary by anxiety and avoidance dimensions.

Relationship Satisfaction

  • Positive Illusions:

    • Partners tend to view each other more positively than they see themselves.

  • Self-disclosure Importance: Key for relationship development.

  • Attribution Styles:

    • Satisfied couples create relationship-enhancing attributions for behaviors.

  • Satisfaction Over Time:

    • Trends in satisfaction varies among relationship types.

Dating in the Virtual World

  • Online Dating Trends:

    • 37% of singles use dating websites; a significant match rate for online connections.

    • Use of algorithms for compatibility with caution about honesty in profiles.