Goals That Support Wellbeing
Goals and Wellbeing
Importance of Goals
- Research indicates goals are crucial for wellbeing.
- Lyubomirsky's research: People striving for personally significant goals (e.g., learning, career change, raising children) are happier than those without strong ambitions.
- Happy people usually have a project they are working on.
Quality of Goals
- The quality and content of goals matter.
- Goals supporting wellbeing should be:
- Authentic
- Intrinsic
- Approach-oriented
- Harmonious/Congruent
- Flexible
- Include change of activity
- Have an intimacy component
Authentic Goals
- Goals should align with personal values, not imposed by others (parents, friends, partners).
- Avoid externally or extrinsically regulated goals.
- Goals focused on money, power, or avoiding guilt are less likely to increase happiness.
- Authentic goals lead to greater happiness.
Achieving Authenticity
- Ensure goals match values and strengths.
- Steps:
- Consider a life domain (studies, work, family, health, hobbies).
- Identify a loose goal in that domain (e.g., spending quality time with friends).
- Use top strengths to help achieve goals. Using strengths promotes authenticity.
- Example: Using humor or kindness to spend quality time with friends.
Intrinsic Motivation
- Goals should be intrinsically motivating: interesting, enjoyable, inherently satisfying.
- Pursue goals because they are rewarding, satisfying, and meaningful.
- Intrinsic goals facilitate personal growth.
- Extrinsic goals are pursued for money, ego boost, power, or fame.
- Extrinsic goals are a means to an end (gaining reward or avoiding punishment) and can cause anxiety and interpersonal problems.
- Find a balance between intrinsic and extrinsic goals, being aware that extrinsic goals are less satisfying.
Approach vs. Avoidance Goals
- Frame goals as approaching a desired outcome rather than avoiding an undesirable one.
- Example:
- Approach: Become fitter and eat healthier.
- Avoidance: Avoid putting on too much weight.
- Example 2:
- Approach: Spend more quality time with partner.
- Avoidance: Not to fight with partner.
- Avoidance goals are linked to less happiness, more anxiety, and distress.
- Approach goals promote wellbeing, while avoidance goals detract from happiness.
Goal Harmony/Congruence
- Goals should complement one another.
- Conflicting goals (e.g., aggressive career climbing vs. family time) can cause stress.
- Emmons and King found that goal conflict relates to somatic complaints (headache, stomach ache) and stress.
- Goal conflict reduces the likelihood of acting on or thinking about goals, leading to dwelling on problems and goal ambivalence.
- Solution: Stop overthinking, start acting, and ensure goals are congruent.
Goal Flexibility
- Be flexible and adaptable with goals as life circumstances change.
- If goals cause excessive stress, consider giving up commitment rather than effort.
- Carver and Scheier: Giving up effort instead of commitment is short-sighted and self-destructive.
- Focus on replacing burdensome goals with more valuable ones.
- Giving up commitment frees time and energy for more valuable goals.
Activity Goals
- Pursuing activity goals leads to greater happiness.
- Changing circumstances (e.g., new car or laptop) does not provide lasting happiness due to adaptation theory.
- People adapt to circumstances but not new experiences.
- Activity goals (e.g., joining a running group) provide continuous new challenges and opportunities.
Intimacy Goals
- Goals related to intimacy (e.g., being a good listener or role model) are linked to greater happiness.
- Power goals (e.g., convincing others you are right) counteract personal happiness.