adult relationships
Overview of Relationships and Singlehood
Page 1: Course Introduction
Psych 210: Relationships & Singlehood
Instructors: Nicholas Velotta, Nicole McNichols
Page 2: Topics Covered
Modern Marriage
Ethical Non-Monogamy
Queer Relationships
Examining Singles' perspectives
Page 3: Models of Marriage
Historical Timeline of Marriage Models:
Practical Model (1700s-1850):
Family members relied on each other for economic production, child care, education, elder care.
Companionate Model (1850-1965):
Breadwinner-homemaker dynamic, distinct roles in domestic vs employment spheres.
Self-Expressive Model (1965-Present):
Emphasizes free choice, passion, sexual satisfaction, and self-growth.
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs & Marriage:
Physiological + safety needs in agrarian society.
Love + belonging needs during industrialization.
Self-actualization + expression in modern society.
Page 4: Impact of Reduced Resources
Reduction in spousal time and psychological resources.
Increased stress levels across personal and relational domains.
Page 5: Mount Maslow Framework
Developed by Eli Finkel, Ph.D.
Applies Maslow’s Hierarchy to intrapersonal relationships.
Page 6: High Altitude vs Low Altitude
Metaphor for Relationship Resources:
Less oxygen signifies fewer resources to fulfill psychological needs.
More oxygen indicates better access to basic needs.
Page 7: Re-Oxygenating Relationships
Strategies to improve relational health:
Optimize Resources: Use therapy.
Invest in Intimacy: Focus on developing closeness.
Expect Less from Partner: Utilize outside resources for emotional and social needs.
Page 8: Intimacy and Eroticism
Pepper Schwartz's Companionship-Passion Dilemma:
Balances emotional intimacy with sexual passion which thrives on novelty.
Page 9: Keeping Desire Alive
Importance of novelty and exploration in intimate relationships.
Page 10: Esther Perel's Insights
Balancing Connection and Distance:
Passion relies on duality of connection versus autonomy.
Fundamental need for safety and adventure in relationships.
Page 11: State of Intimacy
6000+ users report on diverse gender relationships via a wellness app.
Page 12: Keeping Desire Alive
Importance of exploration and novelty.
Stagnation in sexual intimacy leads to decreased desire over time.
Page 13: Intentional Sexual Planning
Couples should actively plan to explore new dynamics.
Habit formation around exploration is key to sustaining intimacy.
Page 14: Exploring with No Experience Needed
Couples of all experience levels can benefit from exploring eroticism and intimacy.
Page 15: Healthy Communication
Open discussions about sex linked to higher satisfaction and frequency.
Communication can ease anxiety surrounding sexual discussions.
Page 16: Trust and Intimacy
Trust issues can impact intimacy, but do not preclude exploration of eroticism.
Need for emotional safety to foster vulnerability and pleasure.
Page 17: Sexual Longevity
Desire for ongoing sexual fulfillment across the lifespan.
Users aged 20 to over 40 report similar engagement levels.
Page 18: Gottman’s Bid for Connection
Viewing conflict as a form of connection.
Page 19: Ethical Non-Monogamy Concepts
Overview of consensual non-monogamous structures such as polyamory, swinging, and monogamish relationships.
Page 20: Compersion
Recognizing the positive emotions from a partner's romantic connections with others.
Page 21: Infidelity Terms
Replacement of terms like infidelity with non-judgmental labels like "extra-pair copulation” (EPC).
Page 22: Common Myths about CNM
Higher levels of trust and lower jealousy in consensual non-monogamous (CNM) relationships.
Correlation between CNM and increased sexual frequency, communication, and satisfaction.
Page 23: Myths Busted
CNM is not exclusive to any racial demographic; initial data indicates no racial differences.
Not limited to sexually adventurous individuals; group sex is common fantasy.
CNM practices encourage better sexual health standards compared to traditional monogamous relationships.
Page 24: Revising Standard Narratives
Mixed mating strategy and critique on gender norms in sexual relationships.
Emphasizing collaboration in partnerships rather than competition.
Page 25: Physical Aspects and Dynamics
Functions related to sexual selection:
Orgasm asynchrony, sperm competition, and female reproductive strategies.
Page 26: Flinstonization
Exploration of societal names and perceptions around the evolution of family structures.
Page 27: Historical Aspects of CNM in the U.S.
Discussion on the historical context surrounding CNM frameworks.
Page 28: Insights into Queer Relationships
The evolution of notions of intimacy and partnership beyond stigma.
Page 29: Non-Traditional Family Structures in Queer Communities
Frameworks redefine commitment and fidelity in queer spaces.
Page 30: Communication in Queer Relationships
These relationships demonstrate less adherence to gender scripts and exhibit better egalitarianism.
Page 31: Sexual Dynamics Across Relationships
Variations in sexual frequency and dynamics observed in CNM relationships.
Important aspects of communication and diversity in sexual encounters.
Page 32: Going Solo: The Rise of Singles
Increase in the number of singles in America; approximately 118 million.
Page 33: Benefits of Being Single
Independence from partner's goals and enhanced freedom for personal pursuits.
Page 34: Solo-Poly Concept
Engaging in multiple intimate relationships while maintaining independence.
Page 35: Downsides of Singlehood
Loneliness issues and the negative societal perceptions of being single.
Experience of discrimination and feeling excluded from couple-centric social settings.
Page 36: Hesitance in Dating
Indecision about dating due to uncertainty in personal life scenarios.
Page 37: Dating Challenges
Acknowledgment that the dating process can be imperfect.