How do good conversations work? Philosophy has something to say

Introduction to Conversation in Philosophy

  • Speaker: Stephanie Ross, Professor Emerita of Philosophy at the University of Missouri-St Louis.

  • Relevant Works: Author of "What Gardens Mean" (1998) and "Two Thumbs Up: How Critics Aid Appreciation" (2020).

  • Central Question: What makes for a successful conversation?

Purposes of Conversation

  • Functions of Conversation: Many purposes are served by conversation, including but not limited to:

    • Imparting information

    • Asking questions

    • Forging connections

    • Venting emotions

    • Changing attitudes

    • Gaining status

    • Urging action

    • Sharing stories

    • Advising

    • Amusing

    • Comforting

    • Challenging

  • Philosophical Implications: Understanding how conversations work reveals insights into language and human functioning.

Historical Perspectives on Successful Conversations

British Philosophers: 18th Century Thought

  • Impression and Ideas: Focus on transferring ideas between minds as a measure of conversational success.

  • Problem of Other Minds: We cannot confirm that another person has fully grasped our meaning, leading to limitations in this approach.

  • Limits of Language: Words are often more complex than simply labels for objects in the world, complicating our understanding of communication.

Contextual Importance

  • Context Affects Meaning: The significance of an utterance depends greatly on the context in which it is delivered.

  • Example: "The bus is coming" could be an urgent call to action or a warning, depending on the situation.

Speech Act Theory

J.L. Austin's Contributions

  • How to Do Things with Words (1962):

    • Locutionary Acts: The act of saying something meaningful.

    • Illocutionary Acts: The intended meaning behind a statement; its 'force.'

    • Perlocutionary Acts: The accomplishment of specific outcomes through words (e.g., promising, marrying).

  • Conditions for Success: Certain conditions must be met for the intended outcomes of speech acts to succeed.

H.P. Grice's Cooperative Principle

  • 1975 Contributions: Cooperation is central to successful conversations.

    • Cooperative Principle Definition: Grice famously defined a cooperative conversational contribution as: "Make your conversational contribution such as is required at the stage at which it occurs, by the accepted purpose or direction of the talk exchange in which you are engaged."

    • Four Maxims:

    • Maxim of Quantity: Provide the right amount of information.

    • Maxim of Quality: Be truthful.

    • Maxim of Relation: Stay relevant.

    • Maxim of Manner: Be clear and orderly.

  • Impact of Violating Maxims: Non-adherence can undermine communication and result in misunderstandings.

Elements of Receptiveness in Conversation

  • Characteristics of a Good Interlocutor:

    • Willingness to engage

    • Deference to the other participant’s contributions

    • Curiosity and interest in the conversation

  • Flowing Conversations: Conversations are often characterized as "flowing" when both parties share a communicative goal.

Variability in Conversational Engagement

  • Differences in Engagement Levels:

    • Some people are naturally reticent; others may dominate conversations.

    • Interest, admiration, and attraction can enhance conversational enjoyment.

    • Historical context: Salons and coffeehouses in the 17th and 18th centuries valued wit and erudition.

Barriers to Successful Conversations

  • Conversational Attitudes: Different personal attitudes towards topics and each other can affect dynamics.

  • Power Dynamics: Power imbalances can inhibit fair participation in discourse, particularly in gendered contexts.

  • Deborah Tannen’s Analysis:

    • Cultural Perspectives on Gender:

    • Men view conversation as a status game.

    • Women view conversation as a means to connect.

    • Troubles Talk: Men often seek quick solutions; women tend to share similar personal experiences.

The Danger of Being Talked At

  • Definition: "Being talked at" occurs when one participant dominates the conversation and belittles the other.

  • Pygmalion Syndrome: Characterizing others as objects to be shaped or filled with knowledge, especially in gendered contexts.

Recognition of Micro-affirmations and Micro-aggressions

  • Micro-affirmations: Small acts promoting others' success that can support positive interactions.

  • Critique of Micro-affirmations: Concern that these acts can be inequitably distributed and create undue power dynamics.

Conclusion

  • Valuing Good Conversations: What constitutes a good conversation is complex and remains a contentious issue.

  • Encouraging Reflection: To foster good interactions, the article emphasizes: "To create lasting bonds, reflect on features of effective conversation, aiming for satisfying, thoughtful, and memorable exchanges." The significance of enhancing conversational skills is universally recognized.