Week 11 Module 10: Communication and Feedback

Prework 1

My situation: me and my friend had a clash of plans on the same day and we had to talk to each other to sort out what was going to happen and how we could accommodate both our needs while maintaining our friendship.

I feel frustrated and a little stressed because our plans for the same day overlap, and I really want us both to enjoy our time without feeling rushed or left out. I value our friendship and want us to find a solution that works for both of us. I would appreciate it if we could discuss our priorities and see if we can adjust the schedule so that we both get to do what we were hoping for, or maybe find a compromise that makes the day enjoyable for both of us

When you scheduled your plans on the same day as what we had already organised,
I feel stressed and torn because I want to spend time with you but I understand you also have important plans you want to attend to or you may have forgotten.
Because it’s important for me to honor both our plans and maintain our friendship without causing tension or disappointment.

I would like us to discuss and adjust our schedules so that we can each get time for what we were hoping to do, or find a compromise that works for both of us,
Because this will help us both feel considered and keep our friendship positive.

What do you think?

Prework 2

1. Opening / Establishing Credibility (Ethos)

• Ethos: Establishes himself as credible and relatable. He shows he understands American history and values, positioning himself as a thoughtful, informed leader.

• Why effective: Builds trust with the audience from the start.

2. Addressing Emotional Context (Pathos)

• Pathos: Evokes pride in American opportunity; creates an emotional connection to shared values of freedom and equality.

• Why effective: Inspires hope and identity with his audience.

3. Presenting Problems Logically (Logos)

• Logos: States societal problems clearly, using logical reasoning to highlight the gap between ideals and reality.

• Why effective: Appeals to reason and sets up the need for action.

4. Personal Experience & Relatability (Ethos + Pathos)

• Ethos: Demonstrates integrity by acknowledging personal complexity.

• Pathos: Connects emotionally by sharing personal and communal struggles.

• Why effective: Humanizes Obama, making him trustworthy and relatable.

5. Offering Solutions & Rational Arguments (Logos)

• Logos: Presents a rational plan for social improvement.

• Pathos: Also inspires hope and moral responsibility.

• Why effective: Combines logical argument with emotional motivation.

6. Closing / Call to Action (Ethos + Pathos + Logos)

• Ethos: Positions himself as a responsible leader.

• Pathos: Inspires shared purpose and hope.

• Logos: Logical reasoning that collective action can produce real change.

• Why effective: Persuasive, memorable ending that motivates action.

Summary:
Obama’s speech is a masterclass in integrating Aristotle’s persuasion:

• Ethos: Credible, relatable, morally upright.

• Pathos: Evokes hope, unity, pride, empathy.

• Logos: Presents logical reasoning and solutions.

Listening block

I allow my feelings to distort my listening (e.g. I feel guilty and as a result interpret what you say as a criticism of me). NO

I make mental judgements about the person, or about the rights or wrongs of what they are saying. Yes and NO, it depends on the context of the situation.

I get preoccupied with something that was said earlier in the conversation. NO

I start to think about solutions before I have got enough information about the problem. YES

I jump to conclusions. NO

I daydream. NO

I get pre-occupied with something that is worrying me or concerning me. YES

I worry about my performance or success in this interaction with them. YES

I wonder what they think of me. YES

I feel defensive and want to avoid hearing something. NO

I filter, so that I focus only on what interests me or confirms my own views. NO

I hear what I want or expect to hear the other person saying. NO

I try to keep a point/idea in my head because I don’t want to forget it. YES

• I try to listen to other things going on around me. SOMETIMES

• I stereotype the person. NO

• I argue in my head with the person. NO (although I think about the conversation)

• I get immersed in my own emotional responses to what is being said. NO

• I can be impatient and pre-occupied with getting on. NO

• I rehearse what I am going to say next. YES

Prework 3

In highschool, one friend exaggerating information to another friend. This friend would then come back to me with that mis-information. This made me upset because it led to misunderstandings and strained our friendships. We talked about it later and managed to sort everything out.

Recall and Recognise:
I recognized the situation where a friend exaggerated information to another, which then came back to me as misinformation. I recalled how this led to misunderstandings and tension in my friendships.

Comprehend and Interpret:
I understood why this misinformation caused upset and how miscommunication can impact trust and relationships. I interpreted the situation as an opportunity to see the consequences of unverified information.

Relate and Connect:
This experience connected to broader lessons about social dynamics, honesty, and communication. I related it to other times when misunderstandings affected relationships, noticing a pattern in how trust is built and broken.

Critically Examine:
I examined my own response and emotions critically, reflecting on why I felt frustrated and how my reactions might influence the situation. I also considered the perspective of the friend who shared the misinformation, understanding they may not have intended harm.

Evaluate and Self-Assess:
I evaluated the effectiveness of the way I addressed the situation. Speaking openly with my friends and clarifying the misunderstandings worked well, but I realized I could have stayed calmer initially. I assessed my conflict-resolution skills and emotional responses.

Transform and Plan:
I plan to apply these lessons in the future by verifying information before reacting and approaching conflicts with empathy and patience. This experience has transformed my understanding of communication, trust, and interpersonal relationships, helping me develop stronger social and emotional skills

“I” Statement Activity

Situation:

One group member frequently misses scheduled meetings and doesn’t respond promptly to messages, which slows down the project and causes stress for the team.

Assertive “I” Statement:

“I feel concerned and stressed when our scheduled meetings are missed or when messages go unanswered because it makes it difficult for the rest of the group to coordinate our work and meet deadlines. I value your contributions and want us to succeed as a team, so I would appreciate it if you could attend the meetings we schedule and respond to messages within 24 hours. This will help everyone plan their work better, reduce last-minute pressure, and ensure we can submit a high-quality project on time. I’m happy to discuss any challenges you’re facing so we can find a solution together.”

READINGS

Here are concise notes on the key concepts from Wood's (2011) chapter "Listening and Responding to Others":

🧠 Importance of Listening

• Listening vs. Talking: Listening is at least as important as talking in communication.

• Time Spent Listening: The average person spends 45% to 55% of waking time listening to others.

• Effective Managers: HR professionals rank listening as the number one quality of effective managers.

🧭 The Listening Process

1. Being Mindful: Focus on the people you're interacting with; it's an ethical commitment to attend fully to others in particular moments.

2. Physically Receiving Communication: Involves hearing sounds, interpreting nonverbal behaviors, and reading lips or ASL.

3. Selecting and Organizing Communication: What we attend to depends on physiological influences, expectations, cognitive structures, social roles, and membership in cultures & social communities.

4. Interpreting Communication: Putting together all that we've selected and organized to make sense of communication.

5. Responding: Includes expressing interest, asking questions, voicing our own ideas on a topic, and communicating attentiveness.

6. Remembering: We forget a lot of what we hear; after eight hours, we recall only about 35% of the information.

🚧 Obstacles to Effective Listening

• Situational Obstacles: Message overload, message complexity, environmental distractions.

• Internal Obstacles: Preoccupation, prejudgments, lack of effort, not recognizing diverse listening styles.

🧩 Forms of Ineffective Listening

• Pseudolistening

• Monopolizing

• Selective listening

• Defensive listening

• Ambushing

• Literal listening

🛠 Guidelines for Effective Listening

• Informational and Critical Listening Skills:

  • Be mindful

  • Control obstacles

  • Ask questions

  • Use aids to recall

  • Organize information

• Relationship Listening Skills:

  • Be mindful

  • Suspend judgment

  • Strive to understand the other’s perspective

  • Express support

🎯 Listening Goals

• Listening for Pleasure: Enjoyment without the need for analysis.

• Listening to Discriminate: Distinguishing between different sounds or messages.

• Listening for Information: Gaining and evaluating ideas, facts, opinions, and reasons.

• Listening to Support: Understanding and responding to others' feelings, thoughts, and perceptions in affirming ways.