Close Relationships

Course Announcements

  • Tomorrow, postings are due by 11:59 PM, available until Sunday.

  • Exam Three is scheduled for next Thursday in class.

    • Format will be the same as previous exams:

    • 20 questions total (choice questions)

    • Links to 1 or 2 films

    • 2 short answer questions, totaling 50 points.

  • Ensure login for algebra is functioning, as it will be needed for the exam.

Exam Preparation

Content Covered in Exam Three

  • Chapter 7: Attitudes, Beliefs, and Consistency

    • Knowledge required on:

    • Textbook material

    • Lecture uploaded by the instructor

  • Chapter 9: Prosocial Behavior

    • Two parts covered

    • Study both textbook and lecture slides.

  • Chapter 11: Interpersonal Attraction and Rejection

    • Familiarity with textbook and lecture slides is necessary.

  • Chapter 12: Relationships

    • Focus on lecture slides primarily; can review textbook if needed.

Optional Review Session

  • An optional review for Exam Three will be held in-person next Tuesday at 8 AM.

    • Conducted by Kylie, aimed at revisiting the material mentioned.

  • Attendance is optional; typically, about half the class attends these sessions.

  • Review will encompass:

    • Chapters from the textbook.

    • Lecture notes.

Schedule of Remaining Semester

  • After Exam Three, only two chapters will be covered:

    • Prejudice and Intergroup Relations on the following Tuesday.

    • Aggression and Antisocial Behavior on the Thursday thereafter.

Thanksgiving Break

  • Tuesday, November 25th, will be off due to expected family travels for Thanksgiving.

  • Regular Thursday class is already off for the holiday.

  • Post-Thanksgiving, two review days will be scheduled to cover all course material leading up to the final exam:

    • First Review: Part One on the first Tuesday after Thanksgiving.

    • Second Review: Final Day on December 4th, potential changes to format with examples.

Overview of Today's Lecture: "What is Love?"

Topics Covered

  • Exploration of definitions and concepts surrounding love.

  • Two primary types of love.

  • Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love.

  • Brief overview of attachment styles.

What is Love?

  • A universally intriguing subject, difficult to define despite widespread fascination across disciplines.

  • Neuroscience Findings: Different parts of the brain activate for different types of love.

    • Example: Romantic love activates the anterior cingulate cortex (ACC), associated with high emotions.

    • Other forms of love include:

    • Love for friends, pets, and nature.

  • Cultural Perspectives: The Greeks categorized love into four domains:

    • Storge: Love for family.

    • Philia: Love for friendship.

    • Eros: Romantic and passionate love, also includes sexual passion.

    • Agape: Selfless love for a higher power.

  • Philosophical Note:

    • Socrates considered love to be a kind of madness, linking love to mental madness in extreme cases.

Representation of Love in Literature and Music

  • Love has been explored in classic literature (e.g., Romeo and Juliet, Pride and Prejudice) and music (e.g., The Beatles, Adele).

  • Statistical Insight: Approximately 67% of song lyrics revolve around romantic love.

Definitions and Dimensions of Love

Social Psychologists' Definition

  • Love: An emotional state combining intimacy, attachment, and care, motivating closeness and investment in others.

    • Multidimensional with affective, cognitive, and behavioral components.

    • Example: Love can manifest as an action (choice) rather than just feeling.

Components of Love

  • Intimacy: Warmth, emotional support, and understanding developed over time.

  • Passion: Quick, intense physical attraction and emotional highs/lows; often fades over time.

  • Commitment: Decisions to maintain long-term relationships despite fluctuations in passion.

Types of Love

  1. Passionate Love: Intense longing and attraction, often experienced early in relationships.

    • Characterized by physiological arousal and idealization of the partner.

    • Example: Romeo and Juliet as an illustration of passion.

  2. Companionate Love: Deep affection and emotional security; characterized by stability, grows stronger over time.

    • Example: Long-term partners supporting each other and sharing responsibilities.

Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love

  • Introduced by psychologist Robert Sternberg in the 1980s.

  • Components create eight types of love:

    1. Non-Love: Ordinary interactions without intimacy, passion, or commitment.

    2. Liking: Intimacy without passion or commitment (e.g., friendships).

    3. Infatuation: Passion without intimacy or commitment (e.g., crushes).

    4. Romantic Love: Intimacy and passion, but no commitment.

    5. Companionate Love: Intimacy and commitment, but no passion.

    6. Empty Love: Commitment without intimacy or passion (e.g., a long-time relationship lacking connection).

    7. Fatuous Love: Passion and commitment without intimacy.

    8. Consummate Love: Combination of intimacy, passion, and commitment (ideal relationship but rare).

Attachment Styles

Overview

  • Early childhood relationships shape adult love patterns according to attachment theory.

  • John Bowlby, in the 1950s, introduced secure attachment, which generally leads to healthier relationships.

  • Mary Ainsworth expanded this with the Strange Situation study, showing how early bonds affect later relationships.

  • Attachment styles observed in infants can also appear in adult romantic contexts.

Attachment Styles Breakdown

  1. Secure Attachment:

    • Orientation towards love that is balanced and trusting.

    • Key Traits:

      • Comfort with closeness and independence.

      • Ability to express needs and emotions.

      • Effective conflict resolution and trust.

    • Outcomes:

      • Higher satisfaction and communication.

  2. Anxious Attachment:

    • Characterized by seeking constant reassurance; fear of abandonment.

    • Traits include hyper-awareness of partner’s moods and interpreting distance as rejection.

    • Often causes anxiety in relationships.

  3. Avoidant Attachment:

    • Equates independence with safety; often suppresses emotions.

    • Behaviors may include a reluctance to engage in deep relationships and an appearance of detachment.

    • Results in feeling fewer positive emotions overall.

  4. Fearful/Disorganized Attachment:

    • Alternates between the desire for closeness and the fear of being hurt.

    • Associated with past trauma or ambivalent caregiving experiences.

    • Leads to erratic and unpredictable relational behavior.

Significance of Change in Attachment Styles

  • Attachment styles can change but require conscious effort and self-awareness, often facilitated by therapy.

Questions & Interactions

  • Invited students to describe love in one word, generating diverse responses such as:

    • Simple, selfless, vulnerable, confusing, pure, painful, overwhelming.

  • Discussion of how attachment styles shape expectations and behaviors in relationships; encouraged exploration of personal attachment styles.

Suggested Activities

  • Students encouraged to take an online quiz to identify their attachment style and reflect on personal insights.