Narrative Essay Structure and Utilitarian Justice: Study Notes

Course Context and Objectives

  • The instructor guides students to reflect on a difficult moment: after it passes, what did you rely on to get through? The point is that even when a moment stands out, there are consistent parts of yourself you drew on.
  • Purpose: develop awareness of internal resources and how they surface during challenges; prepare students for deeper writing work and self-assessment.

Attendance, Roll, and In-Class Atmosphere

  • The instructor runs through which students are present (Steven, Ace, Maya absent, Taj, Hayden, Savannah, Tabitha often missing, Alexandria, Lily, Michael, Makayla, Ava, Efra, Riley, Brody, Parker, Jonathan).
  • Acknowledge not everybody is present; some students may need to be spoken to outside class.
  • This session precedes the final days of the first essay; planning for the next assignment begins.

Upcoming Assignment: Compare and Contrast Essay on Utilitarian Justice

  • After the current essay, students will write a compare/contrast essay on utilitarian justice versus retributive justice.
  • Utilitarian justice (key idea): sentences are selected with rehabilitation and community reintegration as primary goals; punishment duration (T) is tied to community-approved tasks and aims to rehabilitate the accused and reintroduce them into the community.
  • Retributive justice (contrast): punishment is determined by a court/jury with fixed time (often years) based on the crime; focus is on desert and punishment rather than rehabilitation.
  • The teacher will provide two articles about utilitarian justice; students will debate pros and cons in their paper and may propose a solution.
  • Core questions for the debate: strength of rehabilitation and community accountability vs. risks of inconsistency, potential injustice, or abuse; how to balance harms, fairness, and social protection.
  • Overall aim: move students toward argumentation, critical evaluation, and proposing practical solutions.

Key Concepts: Utilitarian Justice vs Retributive Justice

  • Utilitarian justice components:
    • Sentences may be set or influenced by community input; emphasis on rehabilitation.
    • Community punishment often involves tasks or service aimed at benefiting the community.
    • The ultimate goal is reintegration, not merely punishment.
  • Retributive justice components:
    • Sentence lengths and consequences are determined by courts and juries; punishments are fixed or clearly mandated by law.
    • Emphasis on deserved punishment, deterrence, and societal anger/retribution.
  • Ethical implications:
    • Pros of utilitarian approach: potential for lower recidivism, actual reintegration, community involvement.
    • Cons of utilitarian approach: risk of inconsistency, potential undervaluing of individual rights, possible exploitation of community preferences.
  • Real-world relevance:
    • Ongoing debate about balancing rehabilitation with accountability; how different justice models affect communities and individuals.
  • Formative assignment goals:
    • Compare and contrast two articles, articulate pro and con arguments, and propose a solution or improvement.

Structure: Narrative Essays vs. Traditional Five-Paragraph Form

  • Common student error: too much detail in some paragraphs or too little detail in others.
  • Key objective: move the reader from description to turning points; introduce new, pivotal information; maintain pacing.
  • Narrative structure in class: not bound to the five-paragraph template; organize according to the flow of the story and what needs to be understood.
  • Important concept: transitions should show cause-and-effect and progression (the idea of a Goldberg machine or mousetrap sequence: one action triggers another, leading to the final event).
  • What to include in each section:
    • Early sections: establish setting, participants, and initial stakes.
    • Middle sections: reveal turning points, reveals, and evolving tensions; embed moments that advance the story, not just descriptive fluff.
    • Later sections: escalate to new information, suspense, or twists; avoid overlong digressions on feelings if they delay the core arc.
    • Final sections: reflection and the meaning or lesson learned; avoid overloading with sentiment; connect back to the core question or theme.
  • Question to guide revision:
    • What would I want to know if I only heard the story without living through it?
    • What is essential for understanding the turning point or key twist?
    • What information can be cut or condensed without weakening the narrative?
  • Pacing and paragraph length:
    • Typical paragraph length: about
    • 5\leq n \leq 7 sentences (typical).
    • Some paragraphs may be longer or shorter: as short as 3\leq n \leq 4 or as long as 10\leq n \leq 15; occasionally a paragraph may be as long as 20\leq n \leq 25 sentences, but such length requires a strong reason.
    • If you include a single-sentence paragraph, ensure it carries a crucial transitional or emphatic purpose.
  • Key writing strategies:
    • Identify the turning point and plan the narrative to lead to it smoothly.
    • Use transitions to move from one significant moment to the next with intent.
    • Balance description with action and important plot details; avoid dwelling on minor descriptive minutiae.
    • Use dramatic moments strategically; some scenes deserve detail, others should be compact to keep momentum.
    • Consider ending sections with a cliffhanger or a rhetorical question to engage the reader, without leaving the story unresolved for too long.
  • Narrative flexibility:
    • Narrative essays can deviate from rigid structures; the organization should follow the story’s flow and the reader’s need to understand the turning points.
  • Common pitfalls:
    • Over-describing setup without advancing the plot.
    • Reiterating feelings without linking them to a concrete turn or lesson.
    • Ending with excessive reflection that slows resolution.
  • A practical demonstration of pacing in a kitten-fostering essay critique is provided below.

Practical Examples: Horror Essay and the Kittens Essay – Pacing, Focus, and Detail

  • Horror essay example: exploring why horror movies are popular and how fear is elicited.
    • Possible opening approaches: start with directors targeting a feminine audience, or the history of the masculine monster, or the core element of fear (existential dread, the uncanny).
    • Types of fear discussed:
    • Existential dread and the uncanny (something feels off).
    • Shock/horror and transient fear (a jump, then relief).
    • Build-up to a crescendo (tension rising).
    • Fear as an empowering experience (involvement, survival).
  • Lesson for students: do not spend too much time on enumerating fear types; keep focus on the central subject and the narrative arc.
  • Kittens foster essay critique:
    • Strengths observed:
    • Clear setup: meeting the kittens and the mother cat.
    • Major issues identified:
    • Too much space spent describing kittens and their appearance across multiple paragraphs.
    • The twist (starting a kitten-fostering business) is delayed too long; the reader learns about it only in the 4th paragraph.
    • The ending overemphasizes abstract feelings (confidence, self-reliance, farewell) instead of concrete details about the business and its impact.
    • Overuse of adjectives and grand phrasing creates a sense of weight that isn’t matched by the actual content.
    • Recommendations:
    • Consolidate initial kitten-descriptions into fewer paragraphs; keep only essential details that support the scene.
    • Move the business start and its challenges earlier to create a clear turning point.
    • Introduce concrete details about the business (types of cats cared for, systems used, conflicts, outcomes) rather than primarily emotional reflections.
    • Use direct writing to describe events and preserve emotional moments for the reflective portion after the action.
  • General takeaway from the kittens example:
    • When a story emphasizes action or change, ensure the details chosen actually illuminate that change.
    • Pacing should align with the story’s most important developments; avoid lags in setup when a twist or turning point is available.

Group Work and In-Class Practice

  • Plan for small-group work (~10 minutes):
    • Task: identify the conflict in each student’s story, determine the turning point, and decide how much detail to devote to different sections.
    • Questions to guide groups:
    • What is the central conflict or tension?
    • Where is the turning point, and why is it pivotal?
    • How much time should be spent on background versus new information?
    • What is the next piece of information that will propel the narrative forward?
  • Materials:
    • Students may bring printed copies for quick feedback; otherwise the instructor will review via the class website.
  • Real-world practice:
    • Students should be prepared to discuss their progress in writing and how their conflict is developing in their essay.

Read-Aloud and Revision Techniques

  • Benefits of reading aloud:
    • Helps identify dragging sections, awkward pacing, and places where transitions fail.
    • Helps ensure the writing sounds natural and keeps the reader engaged.
  • Reflection vs. action balance:
    • The final sections should connect the narrative to a meaningful takeaway or lesson, not just a summary.
    • The writer should show how the lesson alters the writer’s behavior or perspective, with concrete examples.
  • Use of rhetorical questions:
    • Placing a question in the reader’s mind can create a subtle cliffhanger and encourage continued reading.
  • Ending with a twist or question:
    • A well-placed twist or a provocative question can keep the reader thinking beyond the final line.

Connections to Foundational Principles and Real-World Relevance

  • Foundational writing principles touched on:
    • Clarity of purpose and audience.
    • Efficient and purposeful detail.
    • Effective pacing and structure shaped by the narrative arc.
    • The balance between description, action, and reflection.
  • Ethical and practical implications discussed:
    • In the utilitarian justice discussion, the ethics of rehabilitation vs punishment and the risk of inconsistent application.
    • In narrative writing, the ethical responsibility to accurately portray events and avoid misrepresenting people involved in real stories.
  • Real-world relevance:
    • The skills practiced—critical analysis, clear argumentation, and precise storytelling—apply to academic writing, journalism, and professional communication.

Quick References and Formulas

  • Paragraph length guidelines (typical):
    • 5 \leq n \leq 7 sentences per paragraph.
    • Some paragraphs may be longer: 10 \leq n \leq 15 sentences.
    • Some may be shorter: 3 \leq n \leq 4 or even a single sentence for emphasis.
  • Core thematic questions to guide revision:
    • Where does the topic shift to a new, essential point?
    • What information will surprise or inform the reader?
    • What details are necessary to understand the turning point and its consequences?

Final Note

  • The instructor emphasizes practical, direct writing with purposeful pacing, clear turning points, and a balance between scene description and meaningful reflection.
  • Students are encouraged to engage in writing as a process: revise by group discussion, read aloud, and bring concrete details that illuminate the central conflict and its resolution.